“But it’s not all about you, Lia. You might be the bride, but I’m the groom, and there has to be pieces of me in the wedding planning as well. My mother knows what that is.”
“Well, maybe if you talked to me about what you wanted, I could help pick those things out.”
He blows out a heavy breath. “You’re creating a fight over nothing. Like I said, something has gotten in your head, and you’re trying to find any excuse not to . . . not to go through with this. And if that’s the case, Lia, just tell me now. I don’t want to get to our wedding day and have you run out on me because you finally found the courage to do so.”
“Brian, I’m not trying to get out of this,” I say, feeling defeated. “I’m just trying to get you to understand where I’m coming from. I want us to be okay. I want you to be on my side. To want me. To not think I’m going through some sort of crisis because I changed my hair. I mean . . . are you going to judge me when I walk down the aisle? Are you going to think my dress is ugly? Is that something I should worry about?”
“No, my mother sent me a picture. It’s a pretty dress.”
I pause and tilt my head to the side. “Your mother . . . sent you a picture of my dress?”
“Yes, she wanted to make sure I approved.”
“That’s not . . . that’s not something you need to approve. That’s my decision.”
“Do you hear yourself?” he asks. “You’re being so selfish. This wedding isn’t just about you, Lia.”
“I didn’t say it was,” I yell. “God, you’re so infuriating. I’m so glad you freaking came here to fix things. Good job.” I move toward the kitchen and grab myself a sparkling water.
“Does any of this have to do with Breaker?”
I pause, the hairs on the back of my neck spring to attention, and I feel my inner rage spike to DEFCON 1 levels.
“I swear to God, Brian,” I say as I spin on my heel. “Bring him up one more time, and I will end this engagement, this wedding, and this relationship. This has nothing to do with him and everything to do with us and our disconnect.”
“I don’t feel a disconnect.”
“Because you’re not here,” I shout. “You’re so blind, so clueless. I mean, hell, I’m offering to put your dick in my mouth, and you can’t even fathom the idea. You should want your dick in my mouth.”
“You want to suck me off?” he yells. He sits down on the couch and leans back. “Fine, Lia. Suck me off.”
“You’re such an asshole,” I say as I walk back to the bedroom.
BREAKER
“I don’t feel very good,” I say as JP and Huxley walk me to my apartment.
“Because you had three shots of Scotch in ten minutes, realized your mistake, tried to counteract with buttery croissants and water, and now your stomach has no idea what to do with itself,” JP says.
“If you puke on my shoes, I’ll murder you,” Huxley says.
“Why did I have to come home? I don’t want to hear her having sex.” I rest my head on Huxley’s shoulder. “I bet she’s a sweet moaner.”
“Can you not speak so closely to my face?”
“I bet she has the best-tasting pussy ever, like . . . a fresh field of flowers.”
“When was the last time you ate pussy?” JP asks as we reach my door. Huxley unlocks it and lets us in.
“I can’t remember, but I bet you hers is fantastic.”
“Just dump him on his couch,” Huxley says.
“No, my bedroom. I want to smell the pillow she used the other night. It smells like her. I want to clutch it.”
“I don’t think I’ve ever seen a more embarrassing display of a man,” JP says. “If only Kelsey didn’t take my phone away so I couldn’t record anything.”
“Kelsey is an angel sent from the heavens above,” I say while clutching JP. “And Lottie, well, she’s funny, and I like that she busts your balls all the time, Huxley. I’ve never seen a woman put you in your place like her. God, the way you grovel around her, talk about embarrassing. But that’s what I’d do with Lia, I would worship the ground she walks on.”
“That’s great,” Huxley says as he pushes me back on my bed. I tumble onto it with a plop.
I hold my feet up and say, “Shoes. Please take off my shoes.”
Huxley points at me, then JP, and says, “Go ahead, remove the shoes.”