“An associate?” I ask.
He shakes his head. “No more from me until I get a little from you.” He takes a deep drink from his bottle then puts it back down on the table.
“You were a job. I was . . . having trouble with my boss and he wasn’t happy with me. When I got assigned to you, I wasn’t sure if this was a real job. Not in the usual way. My boss . . . he liked to play games. Test me to make sure I was still loyal. Needless to say, I wasn’t sure if you were playing me too.”
Ryan’s eyes narrow as he tries to understand what I’m saying, since I’m not being as clear as I should be. “That sounds . . . fucked up. Your boss seems like an incredible asshole.”
My laugh surprises us both. “You have no idea.” It’s so much harder than I thought it would be to just be honest. “If the associate that warned you someone was selling the details on your shipments was the same guy you were talking to in the motel corridor in Tennessee, then you met my boss.”
He leans forward, the laid-back attitude long gone. “I didn’t know you heard us talking. Is that why you freaked out and left? And yeah, that was him. But he was your boss?” His eyes glaze over as he tries to sort through his confusion. “He told me you were the one stealing files from me.”
“Yeah, that sounds about right. Pitting two people against each other is his favorite pastime.” Or should I say was his favorite pastime. “He thought it provided the best results. One side working against the other, no one trusting anyone. And he conveniently watches from the sidelines.”
We’re studying each other. Comparing what we once believed against what we’re learning about each other right now.
“When did he tell you it was me? And why would you stay with me when you found out I was betraying you?” I ask. Ryan keeping me around made sense when I thought he was Mr. Smith.
“He texted me just before we left the police station. Asked me to meet him. Said he had some information for me. That’s where I went when I dropped you here and told you I needed to go by my office.” He laughs, but it’s hollow. He looks off toward the backyard. “It’s easy to see how he played me, looking back. Told me someone approached him, offering a partnership since they knew he’d used my services in the past, and thought he’d like to cut out the middleman. But he made me believe he was on my side. Was making sure they didn’t succeed. He told me you were using me to get close enough to get my financials, my client records, shipments records. Handed me ‘proof.’ Said you were meeting with your contact in Atlanta to give them the rest of the stuff you had on me, and they promised to help get you out of this trouble with the police. I agreed to stick close to you. I wanted to know who was behind this. Who sent you to do their dirty work. I was so fucking pissed off. I sat in my car in the driveway and read through everything he gave me.”
Ryan finally turns to look back at me, leaning forward in his chair with his elbows resting on his knees. “But then I was more confused than ever,” he says, his voice strong but quiet. “Everything he gave me as proof of what you had taken from me was altered. The dates of big shipments were a week later than what I planned. The cargo smaller. The buyers’ names changed. It didn’t make sense. And it was enough for me to doubt what he was trying to make me believe. And then I went inside. I went looking for you. And I found you in the shower and you were so . . . broken. Crying so hard I thought you’d break in a million pieces. It was the exact same way I felt. I knew there was a big piece I was missing.” He gives me a sad smile. “I was going to ride it out and see where we landed.”
His stare is so intense I have to look away. Coughing to clear the lump in my throat, I finally say, “He wasn’t the only one playing a game. I needed him mad at me. Madder than he already was. I needed to lose his trust completely. But I also didn’t want you to lose your business to him. I didn’t want it to become another cog in the wheel of his organization. So I changed the details.”
Ryan reaches forward, his hands sliding around the legs of my chair, and pulls me a little closer. “Tell me the rest of it.”
Taking a deep breath, I tell him about Devon and Amy, without giving away their names. I tell him about Eden, North Carolina, and living in that trailer with Mama until she died. I tell him about Mr. Smith and George and how I didn’t know they were the same person until it was almost too late. I told him about the woman who claimed to be me and how her life and James’s were cut short just so Mr. Smith could make a statement.