“Then I’m going with you,” I say.
“Rosalina,” Kel says.
“I want to help prepare for my father’s arrival and be at his side while he’s healing. Kel, you and the other princes need to restore magic to Castletree. Besides, Astrid and Marigold are still in Spring.”
“Keep Hammergarden is well fortified,” Ezryn says. “We will be safe there. You know I would sooner cut out my heart than let harm befall Rosalina.”
“I suppose you’re right,” Keldarion grumbles.
“And also, I have to get your sword,” I say, suddenly remembering.
“I assumed the Below took it,” Keldarion says.
“No, I threw it into the lake so no one would find it,” I say. “But you’ll have to get it before you go back to Winter. That’s your plan, isn’t it?”
Ezryn tightens his fists. “Do you still intend to pass on your Blessing?”
What? How could Kel consider such a thing?
“I do not know,” Keldarion says. “First, we must replenish Castletree’s magic, then devise a plan to retrieve the necklaces. I will not pass on the rule of Castletree in such a state.”
I run my fingers along his rough knuckles. “Think carefully about this, Kel. You were meant to be High Prince of Winter.”
He gives a low sigh and kisses my hair. Sleep begins to take me, even though it’s morning. “Please stay,” I mumble. “Both of you.”
64
Keldarion
“You can sleep,” Ezryn says. “I’ll keep watch.”
Drowsiness pricks at my consciousness, but I won’t let it take me. “I don’t want to miss a moment of this.”
Rosalina lies huddled between us. Her head rests on Ezryn’s arm, her back pressed against my chest. She’s deep in sleep, body twitching every so often in dreams. Lying here with my mate and my best friend, with the afternoon light drifting in through the curtains, is a relaxing respite I have not felt in an age. “I thought you might have been asleep yourself,” I whisper to him.
“No,” Ezryn says.
I chuckle. “Should have known. Your whole body would rattle with your snores.”
Ezryn gives a quiet laugh, and I’m struck with the bitter edge of sadness that I do not remember the last time we laughed together.
He regards me, and I can tell by the tilt of his helm, it’s something serious. “I know why you didn’t tell me about your bargain with Caspian.”
“I was ashamed.”
“More ashamed than me for what I did at my Blessing? Your parents—you, Kel—were the only ones I could tell. Your family sheltered me against myself. Shame has never been a barrier between us.”
“Ez …”
“After you defied your father and they banished Caspian, I begged you not to follow him. But you confided in me that you were going to Cryptgarden anyway. It was later that I discovered the truth of his plots, how he was working for the Below the whole time. One of his very own minions betrayed his true intentions to me. And when you didn’t return from the Below, it forced me to retrieve you with your army. The army you told Caspian came at your order.”
“If he found out you led that army, he would have killed you.”
“He tried to kill you.”
“I knew I could survive it.” I massage my wrist, still unsure if I have.
“That was the last secret you ever told me.”
I swallow in a dry throat. He’s not wrong.
“You didn’t tell me of your bargain with Caspian, nor when your own mate walked through these very castle doors.” He gives a long sigh. “You lied to him for me, Kel. But you never forgave me.”
I stay silent because he speaks the truth.
“Even though I have been proven right again and again, you will not forgive me.”
There are no words, because again, it is the truth. So often I have wondered what would have happened if Ezryn had not followed me to the Below that fateful day. Had he not harmed those Caspian held dear. If I had not taken the blame for it … Would things have been different?
No, you idiot, I chide myself. Of course, they wouldn’t. We had already made our bargain, and by Sira’s account, that had been another one of his schemes. Maybe that hurts more than the later betrayal. I’d always blamed Ezryn, thinking that his actions had caused Caspian to switch sides. To betray me.
But like the Prince of Thorns had told me when he left me on the side of that mountain, he’d been planning the betrayal from the moment he knocked on Castletree’s door, seeking refuge.