Aurora looked at me for a moment longer before stepping away. Mac pushed in to take her place.
“I’m a panther, like Mom,” he said quietly. “Aurora is a tiger, like Dad.” He winked before turning away. “Just so you can stop wondering.”
I chuckled and faced the island again. Too bad Mac seemed like the black sheep of the family,
because I could tell I’d get along with him perfectly. Everyone else, however, might be a trial.
NINE
AUSTIN
AUSTIN SAT on the couch beside his mom in Kingsley’s study. The place had gotten quite a refresh since Austin saw it last. Maybe adjourning to smoke cigars and drink brandy was a thing of the past.
“I don’t have words for the apology I owe you,” he told her, his stomach in knots. “‘I’m sorry’
doesn’t cut it, and I know that. I should’ve told you I was leaving. I should’ve had the guts to explain face to face instead of taking off in the middle of the night.”
She studied him for a long moment, showing no emotion, not even in her eyes. That had always been her way. The pain his father had unleashed on her had taught her to hide everything away. That was something she’d admitted to him once, and only the once, after drinking too much gin.
“I understand why you left, Austin,” she finally said. “I agreed with it. Maybe I didn’t like the way you did it at first, but given the state of the pack after you left, I understood why it was necessary.” She took a deep breath. “What I don’t understand is why, in all this time, in over fifteen years, you never once called. Or wrote. You never once told me that you were alive.”
The air went out of him, and he sagged where he sat.
“I should’ve called,” he said softly. “I know that. But the truth is…I was lost. I didn’t know where I was headed or where I wanted to end up. I didn’t know if I’d survive the darkness within me, or if it would emerge in the wrong town or with the wrong creature and that would be the end of me.
Eventually I found a forgotten corner of nowhere and just…” He shrugged. “I didn’t intend to be an alpha. I didn’t take the title or claim the territory for a long time. I just…went to sleep, I guess. I didn’t want to trouble you with my life. With my directionless existence. I knew it wouldn’t sit well, and I didn’t intend to change my mind. I figured it was for the best to take a back seat.”
After another pause, she said, “What made you change your mind?”
“A woman walked into my bar after starting her life over. She wouldn’t be defeated. She wouldn’t yield. She entered her first magical battle as a Jane, fearless. She rose to her true potential— keeps rising to her true potential against impossible odds. Somewhere along the way…I realized I wanted to join her.”
“Love is truly a miracle. But has she seen you? Really seen you?”
“She has seen all the parts of me that you’ve always advised me to hide. She’s seen my rage and my twisting darkness. She’s seen my ruthless possessiveness. She’s allowed me to be open and honest and expressive. I haven’t hidden anything from her, and yet she loves all of me anyway.”
She looked away, emotion registering in her eyes, but when her gaze returned, they were steely again.
“But is she able to handle all of you?” she asked. “Seeing it…and being forced to temper it for the sake of your young or your family are two different things.”
His heart felt heavy, and he understood now why he’d always been so afraid to love after Destiny.
Why he’d tried to find a hole in the world and sink into it, comforted by obscurity. It was this language, damning him for the sins of his father. Casting doubt on him because of his genetics. When he was young, he hadn’t controlled his inner darkness, that was true, but it was because no one had taught him how. No one had helped him find balance with his beast. He’d instead found the opposite, a woman who’d exploited him, further convincing his family he was unstable.
As an adult, though, he’d learned his way. Jess had helped him. And, in turn, he’d helped her.
They’d learned from each other.
With sudden clarity came understanding. He would no longer suffer at the hands of his father. He would not live in the past. It was time to look forward. To protect their future.
With confidence, he looked his mom right in the eyes and said, “She cannot only handle all of me, she wants to. You have no idea what her beast is capable of. What she is capable of. We’re a good match.”