Again, I don’t love that she immediately knew who Maddie was talking about. But I’m not sure why I care. It’s not like I have hopes where he’s involved. And, honestly, my outgoing, gorgeous sisters have way more of a chance with him than I do. Oh, and you know, the most important part: I want a stable relationship. Will in no way equals stable.
Propping her face mischievously on her fists, Maddie aims a look at Amelia. “Okay—be honest with us, did you and Will ever hook up?”
“Gross, no!” Amelia says with a genuinely disgusted look. “First of all, Will is like my brother at this point, and the thought of that literally makes me gag. Second of all, I’ve just never been attracted to him.”
“Never?” asks Emily with a studying expression. “You’re telling me that even when he started working for you, you never once found that beautiful muscular man attractive?”
Amelia shrugs. “I don’t know what to tell you. He just never did it for me. I think he’s a great guy, but he’s not my type. Noah on the other hand…”
We all three groan.
“We’re going to kick you out of our group if you continue to act lovesick over our brother,” says Maddie.
“I am lovesick over your brother. Hence the upcoming wedding!” She pretends to flick Maddie in the skull.
“But that’s no excuse to act like it on girls’ night. I mean, dammit, Amelia, at least do the polite thing and pretend you’re sick of him for our sakes,” says Maddie before wincing.
Emily is already handing me a pen as I flip open my spiral pocket notebook and add a tally next to her name.
“How many more do I have until I have to pay up?” Maddie asks.
“Three.” I close the No Swear Notebook and wish I could throw it off a cliff. What started off as an attempt at humor on my end has turned into a full-fledged part of my character that my siblings won’t let me escape. Everyone gets a tally mark when they say a curse word and then has to pay twenty bucks when they hit their twenty swears in a month. It hasn’t made anyone swear less, to be honest. Instead, it’s made us regular contributors to various nonprofit organizations around the town because that’s where I donate our spoils each month after everyone pays up. Just call us a bunch of philanthropists.
“Back to Will, do you think he likes slightly bossy women with blonde hair?” Emily asks, obviously kidding but still kicking up an urge inside me to jump to my feet and yell No! You can’t have him!
I stay quiet.
Maddie apparently has the same thought as me. “No way! If anyone gets to date Will, it’s me. Obviously, he’s the bad boy type and needs someone like me to complement him.” She bats her eyelashes playfully. I love her dearly, but I’m dreaming of plucking out each one of those lashes in this moment.
Amelia—bless her—then looks at me. “You know, I think he’d do better with someone like Annie.”
Madison barks a laugh at this. Emily chuckles too. “Anna-banana and Will Griffin? No. Absolutely not,” says Maddie, chuckling the whole time.
I smile softly and try very hard not to show that my stomach is twisting up in a tight knot.
“I think I have to agree with Maddie on this one,” says Emily. “Annie is so soft and sweet and virginal. Can you imagine her with someone like Will? He’d eat her alive.”
I think Emily meant for that to sound upsetting, but for some reason, it’s not sounding all that unappealing to me. Something I would never admit to my sisters, because, yes, they unfortunately know I’m a virgin and remind me every day of my life.
“Hmm,” says Amelia, with narrowed eyes and a soft smile in my direction. “What do you think, Annie? Would you and Will be good together?”
Immediately my cheeks go hot. If I say yes, my sisters will laugh and continue to point out all the obvious reasons we’re not right for each other. I already know all the reasons （I’m a homebody—he’s adventurous. He has dated countless women—I can’t even get a guy to finish a date with me）， so I decide to skip the embarrassment. “All I want is a nice guy who is going to be there for me every day.”
“See,” says Madison with a playful scoff. “Definitely not Will—BuzzFeed’s sexiest bodyguard and serial dater. And because Annie will wait until she gets married to have sex, and Emily is too bossy for Will, I think I should be the one to bring Will home for a night.”
Emily hits her with a pillow. “How about none of us bring Will home, and we all remain friends?”