Amelia doesn’t do that to me.
However, in this situation, I still don’t want to tell her the truth. Because the truth is, today when Will’s hand touched mine, my entire body felt electrified. When he had his arms around me, I breathed deeply. I breathed deeply, people! And honestly, having him play-fight with me over the letter was the most fun I’ve had with a person in…maybe my whole life. Which is not good because Will is absolutely not the man for me, and I’m not sure I can trust myself not to grow feelings for him over the next couple of weeks when I’m already so clearly attracted to him.
I can’t tell Amelia any of that because then she’d be over on the sidelines watching me a little too closely. Even worse, she might tell Will, and then he’d pat me on the head like everyone else does and tell me my attraction to him is cute. No, this secret is better kept to myself, where I can work alone on squashing any desire toward him.
“I’m worried it’s going to be weird,” I say, keeping my chin nice and level as I deliver that lie because I know for a fact it’s not going to be weird. No part of talking to Will over the last two days has felt weird. In fact, it’s felt good.
“Weird how?”
I sigh. “Weird like…embarrassing. A man who is super good at dating is going to see how terrible I am at it and internally laugh at me. Possibly externally laugh too. There might be pointing and chortling.”
Amelia shakes her head. “You’re looking at it all wrong. A man who is super good at dating is offering to systematically walk you through the steps so you can go off and date someone else nonawkwardly and fall deeply in love so you never have to date again. And really, you have nothing to lose. You’re not trying to date Will, and he’s not even into relationships, so there are zero prospects or expectations on the table. It’s a no-pressure, stringless way to learn how to date.”
I take in a deep breath. “You’re right.”
“I know I am,” she says with a sassy smile. “But now the question is, are you going to tell your siblings?”
“No.” The answer comes out quickly even though I haven’t previously given it any thought. It’s a knee-jerk reaction but feels like the right decision when I say it out loud. I want to do this privately.
I adore my sisters, but in addition to the way they often treat me like a child, they tend to be overly opinionated when it comes to my life—and this is one situation I’d like to navigate on my own without their input, suggestions, or teasing. I can see it now: Emily would create a long list of all the reasons this plan isn’t going to work, and Maddie would make crude jokes about the Bad Boy tutoring the Good Girl, and I just…ugh. I’m tired of it. I’m so tired of that narrative looping around me day in and day out. I’m tired of everyone so neatly placing me in a box and tying a silk ribbon around it and then telling me to sit and stay.
If I want to spend my days learning to date with the dangerously sexy bodyguard, I will.
So no, I’m not going to tell them. I’m not going to tell anyone because this isn’t open for discussion.
CHAPTER TEN
Will
“What’s so bad about the town?” asks Liv Nolsen, my boss, from the other end of the phone line. She is trying to persuade me to extend my stay in Rome, Kentucky, as one of Amelia’s permanent agents rather than transferring to Washington, D.C., and guarding a high-profile politician after the month is out, as I’m requesting. I’ve been here one weekend, and I’m already bored to death.
Usually I’m placed with other celebrities when I’m not working for Amelia—partly because they request me after having seen me on either BuzzFeed and social media, or met me while I worked for one of their famous friends. Amelia is the only celebrity who hasn’t made me want to rip my hair out, though.
And truthfully, my favorite assignments have been providing security for politicians. Why? Because shit gets real for them. It’s rarely dull guarding someone whom half the country hates. And when I’m busy, I don’t have time to stop and think about anything else. I don’t have time to worry whether I’m lonely or whether I made the right career choice. I just work and stay on the move, and my mind remains blissfully clear.
So about ten minutes ago when my boss said she was contemplating keeping me in Rome at the request of Amelia’s team, I felt sick. Not because of Amelia—I’ll gladly provide security for her on each and every one of her tours. But in this sleepy town long-term: no.