His lip twitched with distaste. “My men have impeccable discipline. But there will be difficult times in this war, and is there any amount of discipline that will stop you from crawling to water in the desert?”
I was the water in this metaphor. But did that mean that Glaea, a country populated by many humans, was the desert? That didn’t make any sense.
He took me far beyond the outskirts of camp, out into the rocky plains, where the grass was so tall that it tickled my thighs. The ground beneath it was rocky and uneven. “Watch for that,” he muttered, pointing out a particularly rough patch of gravel and guiding me around it.
“I know,” I said, stepping around it easily, and felt his stare grow a little more intense.
He was interested in me.
That was good—to capture curiosity. It couldn’t keep me alive forever, but it would keep me here long enough to earn his trust. Maybe curiosity was the real reason why he was willing to take the risk of having me join him.
It was a powerful thing.
He led me down a steep incline through narrow openings in the rocks, the grass now gone in favor of jagged stone. I knew this area—I’d killed his last seer not far from here. He brought me to the edge of a lake, all the way down to where the water lapped at shores of gritty sand.
At last, he released my arm and leaned against a sheer stretch of rock. “I need you to seer for me.”
Atrius, I was already certain, was not a man who liked to have things handed to him easily. If I wanted to earn his trust later, and make him believe that he had earned mine, I would need to make him work for it. People did not believe in the value of what was too freely given, and I needed him to believe in me.
So I said, “What makes you think I will?”
He let out a rough exhale, almost a laugh. Then he stared out over the lake.
“Can you see this?” he said.
“In all the ways that matter.”
“What does that mean?”
“It means that I know the water is still and flat. I can sense that there are no ripples in it. I know that there are rocks on the other side, more on the west, and grass on the eastern edge.”
“Those are facts. That’s not the same as seeing it.”
“In what way?”
“When you see the moon rise, some might say there’s something more to it than coordinates in the sky.”
For some reason, I found myself unwillingly thinking of my little painting of the sea.
It’s the ocean.
No, it is paper.
The memory hit me with an uncomfortable pang I didn’t want to look at too closely. I shrugged it away.
“Why are you asking me this?”
“Just wondering if you’re smart enough to know the value of things that can’t be quantified. Like the value of the offer I made you.”
“I don’t think it was an offer. Offers can be accepted or rejected.”
“You can reject it.”
“But you’ll kill me after.”
He didn’t say anything. Just gave me a grim little half-smile.
“I don’t like forcing people to do things,” he said. “Bad way to earn loyalty. And I do require your loyalty, and your services. I can take them permanently, or you can offer them temporarily. I can get them by your fear or your choice. I’d rather the latter, but I’ll do either.”
“So why do you care?”
He shrugged. “Seems a shame for my generosity to go unappreciated.”
I was silent for a long moment. I let him believe it was because I was considering his words, but instead, I was considering how much I should let him win now.
I should give him something. Not all of it—that would be too easy. Plus, the thought of rolling over for him…
It made me think of his entry on our shores. Raeth’s body beneath his armies.
I was supposed to be the good actress, the perfect spy, playing my role without complaint. My personal feelings shouldn’t matter. And yet… I couldn’t shake that anger when I considered the possibility of complete acquiescence.
No. Not yet.
But I’d give him something.
“The Arachessen are more effective and persuasive than you can possibly know,” I said haltingly.
“I’ve had plenty of experience with cults.”
I hated how dismissively he called us a cult.
“They’re worse,” I bit out. “Worse than you can imagine. They see everything. As long as I remain in Glaea, it’s only a matter of time before they find me.”
“I already told you that—”