Into the Fading Twilight (Starlight Grove, #2) (71)

So whatever this was, I wasn’t down with it. I grimaced as I got to my feet and made my way to the front door. Opening it, I couldn’t deny the wave of disappointment I felt as Waylon filled the front porch, his Irish Wolfhound, Lucy, at his side.

He frowned as he took me in. “Somebody steal Christmas?”

My scowl only deepened. “Did you need something?”

“Was coming to ask if you and Sky wanted to come up to the house for boysenberry pie tonight.”

It wasn’t his fault, but those words were a knife to the gut. Images of the picnic on the back deck filled my mind. The pie taste test. The way Nova made every damn thing better.

Waylon’s frown only deepened. “Why do you look like I just offered you arsenic?”

“Skylar’s at a sleepover at Owen’s. I think they’re working on decimating their collection of Halloween candy,” I answered. “I’m just trying to catch up on work.”

His fingers hooked into the straps of his overalls as he rocked back on his heels. “I’m seein’ we have bigger problems than pie.”

“Way—”

He held up a hand to cut me off. “Don’t.” Those dark-brown eyes focused on me in a way that shut me up. Waylon rarely got serious, but I could tell he was about to. “I know you were nearly grown when you came to live here.”

My gut tightened as flashes of memory caught in my mind. Getting off the plane and then having to make the hour-and-a-half drive to the ranch. Mav still recovering from his injuries. Dex having a nightmare as he dozed in the van. Orion shoved into the back corner, not talking to anyone or touching them. Wylder trying to hide how much it all affected him.

And God, I’d felt like I didn’t have a right to be affected by it. Because I hadn’t been there. Not when they needed me.

“So I may not have a right to say any of this,” Waylon went on.

I flashed back to the here and now. “You have a right to say anything. You’ve been more father to me than anyone. You gave us back a sense of family.”

Waylon’s eyes misted at that. “Best thing you could ever tell me.”

“It’s the simple truth.”

“The truth is rarely simple.” Waylon’s gaze leveled on me again. “But I’m gonna give it to you now anyway. You’re lettin’ your life pass you by.”

I jerked as if those words were bullets.

“You take care of Sky, make sure she has everything she needs, but you don’t take care of you. All you do is work. Throw yourself into it like some sort of atonement. The rare extra time you have is spent with the Hourglass Network. Same thing. There’s no time for you to live.”

“Waylon, I—”

“Give me a minute,” he said, cutting me off. “I see the connection you got with that girl.” His eyes flicked to the apartment above my garage. “I see what you did for her. What you keep doing for her. Don’t miss out on something beautiful because you think you don’t deserve it.”

Fucking hell.

My jaw worked back and forth as I stayed silent, trying to process what he’d just said. “You some Bigfoot-hunting, cuckoo-clock-making, alpaca-wrangling therapist?”

Waylon barked out a laugh. “You know it.” He tapped the little embroidered Bigfoot on his overalls as if to punctuate the point.

“I can’t go there,” I said quietly. “For many reasons.”

He scowled. “Give me the number one.”

“It could get me fired. How about that?” I challenged.

Waylon pinned me with a hard stare. “And you’re telling me you couldn’t have a heart-to-heart with Sherri and step aside? Sure, she might give you a slap on the wrist, but I highly doubt she’d fire you.”

It was my turn to scowl. It was a refrain so similar to Nova’s that it made my gut churn. But there was something else, too. A fear I hadn’t given voice to, not once.

“It’s wrong.” The words were out before I could stop them. I hadn’t realized I even felt that way until the feeling slipped free.

“Why the hell would you think that?”

“I saved her. I kept her alive. It gives it sort of … I dunno, a power imbalance. Maybe she’s just grateful I saved her.”

Waylon stared at me for a long moment. “Boy, did someone hit you with the stupid stick this morning?”

“Excuse me?”

“You heard me. That girl up there.” He gestured to the apartment with a jabbing motion. “She may have been through hell, but she’s sharp as a tack. She’s also working through it. I’ve seen her put just about every one of you in your place when you need it, and yet you think she’d show interest in you just because she thought it was the sort of gratitude she owed?”

“I don’t know. I just—”

“It’s called flowers or cookies or a homemade pie. That’s a thank-you. Not looking at you like you’re the only thing she’s ever wanted.”

Everything in me tightened, muscle winding tight around bone. “You think she looks at me like that?”

Waylon barked out a laugh, then shook his head. “The stupid stick definitely got you this morning.”

I glared at him. “You’re not helping.”