Spiral (Off the Ice, #2) (76)

Alarms go off in my head. Too close. Too much. Too good.

To distract myself, I run a loofah over her back. When I feel her under my palm, and smell her sweet scent, I can’t help it. Making sure she’s taken care of doesn’t have to mean I’m compromising my rules. I want to show her that she’s not too much. That she deserves to be taken care of.

With a hand on the bare skin of her waist, I pull her against me, and leave light kisses where her neck meets her shoulders.

“You did so good tonight,” I whisper.

She shivers, turning her head in the other direction.

I tidy her twisted bun, knowing she won’t want to get her hair wet. There’s no stopping the way I feel right now, because even with the worst pain I’ve ever felt in my body, I recognize how good she feels this close to me.

“We c-can’t,” she stutters.

“Can’t what, Sage?” I whisper against the shell of her ear. “I can’t touch you like this?”

I trace a slow finger down her spine. My rules were muddied the moment I felt her lips on mine. But I never wanted Sage to feel like she had to perform some impossible role just because I was breaking a rule for her. I want her to know that if I touch her, it’s because I want to. Because right now, she needs it and I want to give it to her.

She whimpers. “What are you doing, Elias? You’re celibate.”

“I’m celibate,” I whisper. “But you still deserve to feel good. I can do that. Let me make you feel good, baby.”

She grips the side of the tub so tightly her knuckles turn white, but she doesn’t move.

I’m sure she feels my heart hammering against her back too. “Let me take care of you.”

Her breath hitches as if those words have never been spoken to her. “I don’t need to be taken care of.”

Minutes pass without another word, and her declaration lingers in the air. It’s as if it’s a practiced sentence. Like she actually believes that shit.

“You know, the ones who say that usually need it the most.” I’m careful when I brush a strand of hair behind her ear, delicate and gentle, just like she needs. “If you think that’s the truth, I’m going to show you it’s not.”

After a long silence, she whispers, “I don’t expect you to prove anything to me.”

“I don’t need you to,” I say.

No one has ever taken care of Sage Beaumont, and I have the inclination to be the first.

My fingers find her smooth thigh under the water, and slip to her core to feel her arousal. She’s squirms under my touch, desperate for a release. Shaking with nerves and anticipation. “Tell me what you like, Sage.”

“You,” she says on a gasp.

Fuck. I insert two fingers, unable to wait any longer. She moans so loud, I have to clench my jaw to keep from doing the same. This is about her. “Ride them.”

She moves faster, then her uncertain gaze finds mine. “I don’t want to hurt you.”

“The only thing that would hurt me is not seeing you come. Take what you need, Sage.”

She doesn’t hesitate this time. Sage rides my fingers, her moans echoing as she reaches her climax, her head resting in the crook of my neck. She curses, and squeezes her eyes shut when she comes on my hand. Beautiful.

My body aches from the effort of restraint. “Turn around,” I grunt against her temple.

She turns, straddling me, mindful of the bruises starting to purple my skin.

I brush my palm against her cheek, and she leans into the touch. “No more jokes?” I ask.

She smiles weakly, her hazel eyes hot with desire. “Now you know how to shut me up.”

“I never want to shut you up. You’re the only person I ever want to talk to.”

With a hand at the nape of her neck, I draw her lips to mine, kissing her until I moan with pleasure. I could never get tired of feeling her yield to me, relinquishing control and allowing me to hold her completely.

“Can I touch you?” she asks. “You should get to feel good too. I’ll do whatever you want me to.”

Jesus. Her words are like a honey trap. The sincerity on her face only makes my shaking head want to nod. If I feel her fist wrapped around me, I’ll never recover. Never be able to placate the part of me that doesn’t want to let her go. And that’s the last thing she needs.

I know I’m testing the bounds of my self-control, but I can handle it. I can handle this. To make her happy even if I’m fucking miserable.

“Making you feel good makes me feel good.”

She doesn’t seem convinced. “I want you to come with me.”

Having this woman tell me what she wants might be my favorite thing.

“How’s this?” I bring her attention to where I wrap my hand around my erection. She watches my rhythmic movements through the soapy water, and her throat bobs.

“Is that—do you have piercings?” She barely contains her shock. The shiny metal piercing gleams under the soapy water. Her hands rest on my thighs, and the touch makes me shudder. I got the piercings in college, so no girl has ever seen them. Now, with Sage toying with my self-control, I hold back from asking her to touch them with her tongue.

“Long story.” Sage doesn’t need to know the reckless shit the guys and I did at Dalton.