You've Found Oliver (You've Reached Sam, #2)(44)

She writes down a few more things on the board. Then she hands out blank paper. A few people move their desks to the windows. I take out a pen and think about what to write. My mind goes back to the home, since that’s what we’ve been focusing on. Memories are anchored in space. Maybe that’s why I struggle with these assignments. Because I’ve blocked so much out. But a home can be made anywhere, right? Like the places I’ve known all my life. I have memories attached to every inch of Ellensburg. Of course, a lot of these were with Sam. The two of us sitting by the lake together. Watching the sunset on our walk home. Riding our bikes around the neighborhood.

Maybe that’s why I don’t want to move away. Because I can still feel his presence everywhere. I don’t remember what I had for breakfast yesterday, but I remember what movie we watched on his couch when we were snowed in that winter. Or the time he carried me on his back when I hurt my knee playing soccer. Whatever broken home I inhabited, at least he was a part of it. He was always there for me. The only place left to see him is in my dreams. But I keep waking up from them.

Maybe if I went back more than six months—maybe I could have saved you.

I continue writing until the end of class. Then I tuck the paper into my bag and head out.



* * *





It’s raining a little tonight. Mom texted me a few hours ago, asking if I wanted to come home for dinner. She’s been sick for almost a week now but seems to be feeling a lot better today.

We make orange chicken and broccoli, which I might have slightly burned. Mom says it gives it a “nice char.” At least the rice is cooked perfectly. Of course, she serves the food on the ceramic plate we made. She’s been wanting to take another pottery class together.

“I can look into it tomorrow,” I say.

“Are your classes going well?”

“They’re fine. Just a lot of catching up to do.” I take a bite.

“And how was your trip to Seattle? I’ve been meaning to ask you.”

“It was fun,” I say casually. “They had this really big street fair. You know, played some games, had some corn dogs.”

“Which friends did you go with?”

“His name is Ben.”

“Ben…” She repeats his name. “Don’t know if you’ve mentioned him before.”

I take another bite. “He actually lives in Seattle. I was visiting him.”

“How do you two know each other?”

“He’s a new friend. But we’ve been chatting for a while.”

“It’s quite the commute to meet someone, don’t you think?”

“It’s not the first time we met,” I explain. “He’s visited me, too. I showed him around Ellensburg. He goes to the University of Washington. He’s a first year like I am. He studies astronomy.”

“Well, that’s a very good school.”

“Yeah, he’s really smart,” I tell her. “He’s really into space and stuff. For his graduation gift, he picked out a telescope. Isn’t that funny?”

Mom nods with approval. “Sounds like a refined young man. Hopefully, I’ll get to meet him one day.”

“Yeah. Hopefully.”

I don’t say anything else because I’m realizing that might never happen: the two of them being in the same room together. The thought of this breaks my heart a little. So I push it out of my mind.

At least Ben and I can see each other. For now, that’s all that matters to me.





Chapter

Seventeen



I wake up early to call Julie. She’s been traveling around Northern Europe for the past few days, sending me photos of her trip. We haven’t had the chance to talk over the phone. She should have returned to Copenhagen this morning. I’ve been waiting all week to catch up with her.

It always takes ages for her to answer. Will you pick up already.

“Julie? Are you there—”

“Sorry, I literally just got home,” she says finally. “Long day again. We went to this gorgeous harbor bath. I’ll send you a photo of it. Apparently, everyone’s into cold plunging here. I didn’t do it, obviously. But it was interesting to watch.”

“Honestly, that sounds nice right about now.”

“It’s supposed to be good for your health. I really wish you could visit. I miss you.”

“I miss you, too.”

“What have you been up to? Tell me everything.”

“Oh, you know…school, work, Ben.”

“Right, the new boy. How are things going with him?”

It feels strange keeping things a secret from her. I wonder if I should just tell her already. “The distance is still a lot. But we’re making it work so far.”

“That’s good to hear. Are you seeing each other again this weekend?”

I sigh. “I wish. He has this research presentation. He’s been stressing about it all day. We’re making plans to see each other next week though.”

“What kind of research does he do?” she asks.

“He’s an astronomy major. So something smart like that.”

“Why don’t you go to his presentation and surprise him? I bet he’d really appreciate that.”