Leo blinked, taking two long breaths. “Boyfriend?”
I chuffed a laugh, turning and striding to my car. The words that burst out of my throat without permission were immature and hasty, but I didn’t care. “Ex, now.”
“Whoa, whoa, wait,” he said, catching up to me and taking me by the elbow to spin me toward him. “What do you mean ex?”
“You completely disrespected me,” I screamed through my tears, chest tight. “I asked you not to. I begged you. And you did it anyway.”
Leo’s face leveled out more with every word. “Mary.”
“No,” I ripped my arm out of his grasp. “I can’t believe you.” I shook my head, tears blurring my vision. A short laugh chopped out of me. “Actually, I can. I really fucking can. I should have known better.”
I hated myself before the next words even left my lips, but I wanted to hurt him. I wanted him to feel loss like I felt in that moment.
A small part of me remembered feeling this way before with him, seven years ago, when he hurt me and I was desperate to return the favor.
“You don’t really care about me,” I said. “You just wanted a prize, something to have on your arm and get in fights over. You didn’t stop to think twice about what I wanted, how this would impact me and my fucking dream. I have worked for years for this. Years, Leo. Imagine if I did this to you, if I tore through the stadium and ripped a cheerleader off the top of a pyramid by her hair for ogling you or bragging to her friends in the bathroom how you’d fucked her into the next decade at a party last year.”
Leo had completely sobered now, all the fight gone from him as he rushed me and pulled me into him. He held me tight, brushing his fingers through my hair.
“I’m sorry,” he breathed.
His knuckles were bleeding.
So was his eyebrow.
“I’m so sorry,” he said again when I didn’t pull away. “You’re right. I was stupid. I just—”
“Didn’t think,” I finished for him, sniffing and pulling away. “Yeah. I know.”
He crumpled. “Stig, I—”
I held up one hand to stop him. “Don’t you understand?” The realization hit me like a boulder, one that fell from a skyscraper and squashed me like a bug. I sniffed, searching his gaze. “I trusted you.”
That nearly broke us both, and I tore away from him, needing to get away from his touch.
“I trusted you not to hurt me. You promised me I could.”
“I would never hurt you,” he said, voice booming.
“You already did.”
His nostrils flared, jaw hinged tight as his eyes glossed over just like mine. But he didn’t move, didn’t try to touch me again, didn’t try to argue. He just stood there waiting for me to absolve him.
And I couldn’t.
“Leave me alone, Leo,” I pleaded softly, bringing my eyes to meet his. “I need you to leave me alone.”
He swallowed. “What if I can’t?”
“Then you’ll prove that you really don’t care about me at all.”
Twenty minutes later, I pulled up to Giana and Clay’s.
They made up the couch for me without asking a single question, and Giana held me as I cried until I fell asleep.
Leo
Twenty-four hours ago, everything was different.
My biggest worry yesterday had been football. We had an away game against our rivals in two weeks after our bye this weekend, and it was all we could focus on. If we won, not only would it be a rivalry win, but it would secure a bowl game for us.
Coach had also told me there would be multiple scouts at this game — scouts who had been visiting our campus throughout the season with their eyes on our seniors.
On me.
Yesterday, I was full of hope. I had sped home with nothing but excitement flowing through my veins as I rushed to tell Mary. Yesterday was a whole different world, a completely different universe.
Today, I woke up in hell.
Mary never came home last night, and she ignored every single text and phone call from me. The only solace I found came at almost midnight when Clay texted me and told me she was at his and Giana’s place. I’d sucked in a breath of relief so fierce I’d nearly collapsed.
But even though I knew she was safe, I still couldn’t sleep.
Because safe or not, I’d lost her all the same.
Every time I thought the words, my stomach would roll so violently I nearly puked. Then, I’d immediately shove the thought down, suffocating it before it had the chance to invade my brain again.
I didn’t lose her.
I couldn’t lose her.
My chest was on fire all night and well into the morning, even as I got myself ready for the day. All I could see was Mary’s eyes when I realized what I’d done, the way she looked at me like I’d just proven every doubt she had about me correct.
And I guessed I had.
I didn’t think about it from her perspective until it was too late. Hell, I didn’t think about it at all. It was disrespectful to step in like some big bad motherfucker when she’d already told me she’d handled it. It didn’t make anything better when I clocked that stupid bicho in the mouth. It didn’t even make me feel better. All it did was piss me off more because he stood right back up, and then, he hurt Mary even more.
Because of me.
And to add more shit to the pile, Nero had me by the balls, too. If he went to the police, if he pressed charges… my career would be snuffed out before the flame had the chance to catch.
There was a bottomless pit of doom in my stomach with so much uncertainty. I didn’t know if Nero really wouldn’t press charges or if I’d walk into a media shit storm at the stadium. I didn’t know if Mary meant leave me alone as in for the night or forever.
It couldn’t be forever.
I convinced myself that somehow it would all be okay as I dragged my ass to practice. Despite how dead I felt inside, how hard it was to breathe not knowing where I stood with Mary, I managed to put it all away and show up for my team. I balled out at practice, and to everyone on that field, I was just fine. I was better than fine. I was on fire.
Everyone, that was, except for Clay, Zeke, Riley, and my roommates.
They all watched me like a bomb that would detonate with one wrong step.
When practice was wrapped and we were in the locker room, they cornered me.
“What the hell happened?” Riley demanded in a hushed voice. “Why are your knuckles scabbing and why did Mary sleep on Clay’s couch last night?”
I filled them in as emotionlessly as I could, locking everything down because otherwise I knew I’d fall apart right then and there. And as a leader, as their captain — I couldn’t do that in front of my team.
By the time I finished, they were all silent, their brows pinched together.
“Shit,” Zeke said.
“Yeah,” I agreed.
No one had time to offer a word of advice before Coach Lee’s voice boomed through the room.
“Hernandez,” he said, and all eyes whipped to where he was standing in the doorway of his office. He tilted his head toward it with his lips pressed into a hard line.
Fuck.
I closed the door behind me once I dipped into his office, and when I sat down across from him, we both sat there silent. Coach finally let out a frustrated breath and said, “We both know why we’re here, so let’s not fuck around.”