He pumps harder into me, and this time, I scream as I come around his cock and fingers.
Kirill kisses me through it, my tongue wars with his even as he suffocates me.
He knows exactly how tight I get when he steals my breath and he never shies away from repeating the move over and over again.
But if I’d hoped he’d be done, I’m proved utterly wrong.
He throws me back down on the grass again, ass in the air, and keeps going at a maddening pace.
On.
And on.
And on.
Until I nearly faint.
Until I can’t think of the sentence “it’s only physical” anymore.
There’s definitely nothing purely physical about this.
19
KIRILL
“Give up already.”
Sasha growls deep in her throat as she lunges at me. This time, I provoked her so thoroughly that she doesn’t stop and think about strategy.
She’s mindless, brimming with adrenaline and an unhealthy dose of rage.
Sweat trickles down her temples and throat and slips under her sports bra right between her tits. Am I annoyed at sweat for taking the place that’s rightfully mine? Possibly.
I step out of the way when she tries to high -kick me, then I push her in the opposite direction. She falls on the grass, but it’s not hard enough to cause permanent damage.
Or any damage, really.
She’s always asked me to take her seriously and go all in, but that’s impossible. I’ll only hurt her, and I’d rather cut off my arms than do that.
I know she gets off on practicing and violence. She’s a true product of the military life and has unknowingly turned into one of those soldiers who can’t survive without physical stimuli.
And while I relate to the feeling to an extent, I don’t make it my entire personality like some of my men. And Sasha.
We’ve been at the cabin for two and a half weeks, and whenever I’m not fucking her brains out, she demands a match. These morning duels have become a routine that she looks forward to every time. She even dresses for the occasion.
Now, I would like to point out that the tight sports bra and these tiny shorts hugging her toned legs are a huge distraction. If I didn’t know better, I’d say she was doing it on purpose to scatter my attention.
“Are you done being beaten up for sport?” I cross my arms and stare down at her position on all fours and lower my voice. “We can move on to a more entertaining activity.”
She glares up at me, jumps up, then holds her hands up in guard. “I’m not done.”
A battle cry echoes in the air before she goes in with a punch. I engulf her fist in my palm. “Stop being stubborn. If I decide you won’t get a hit in, you won’t.”
“Ugh.” She pushes with all her strength. “I’m not giving up.”
“In that case, we might have to stay here all day.”
“I don’t care!”
“Well, I do. I prefer other pleasurable physical activities.”
“Dream on, asshole.” She ducks and tries again.
I grab her by the waist while holding her hand so that her back is against my chest. Then I lower my head and whisper in her ear, “I promise you’ll enjoy what I have in mind more than this. In fact, it’ll help reduce that anger.”
“You’re making me angrier right now with your stupid nonchalance.”
“I can also fix you some herbal tea to purge the strain.” I nibble on the shell of her ear.
“Kirill!” she grunts, obviously on the verge of exploding.
“Yes?”
“Fight me seriously and stop playing around.”
“I refuse.”
“But why?” She narrows her eyes. “You think so little of me?”
“No. I’m just not a fan of the idea of hurting you.”
“Really?” She elbows me and slips out of my hold. “You did that just fine when you announced your engagement to Kristina while I was standing right there.”
“You’re never going to forgive me for that, are you?”
“I don’t know. Maybe I won’t. I might consider it if you take me seriously.”
“You’re the one who asked for this, so don’t come crying to me when you can’t walk.”
She grins and doesn’t waste any time. Sasha comes at me with all her might. I push her to the ground, enjoying the feeling of having her trapped underneath me a bit too much.
After a few moments, she manages to escape and tries to high-kick me. I circle her ankle and yank. She loses her balance and hits the ground again.
Usually, she’d jump right back up, but she remains unmoving.
I didn’t put power behind the pull, so she should be fine.
Right?
“Ow,” she grunts, balling into a fetal position and holding her stomach.
“Fuck.” I run to her side. “Are you okay?”
Her face is contorted, eyes half closed and sweat beading on her upper lip.
Fucking fuck.
I reach a hand toward her. “I told you not to fucking fight me! Where does it hurt? Can you move—”
In a fraction of a second, she rolls onto her back and kicks me in the face, then jumps away while wearing a shit-eating grin. “Got you!”
I touch the throbbing spot in my cheek with the back of my hand. The little fucking— Without a word, I turn around and head toward the cabin. My tendons nearly snap with tension and my head feels like it’s at the point of exploding.
Sasha soon falls in step beside me and pushes my shoulder with hers. “Don’t be a sore loser. Let’s continue.”
I say nothing.
“Oh, come on. You throw me down all the time. You don’t see me acting butthurt.”
She does—all the time, whining and grumbling like a fucking baby. Sasha seems to have the memory of a goldfish about some things but has no problem recalling all the grudges she holds against me.
“Is it so wrong for me to win even once?”
No reply.
“Are you seriously pulling the silent treatment on me because I kicked you?”
I face her so suddenly, she crashes into me before stepping back.
Her throat bobs with a swallow when her eyes meet mine. “Why…why do you look so scary?”
“I thought you were seriously hurt because of me. Don’t you ever, and I mean fucking ever, do that shit again. Do you hear me?”
Her throat works up a swallow. “I didn’t think…”
“You obviously didn’t. If you want to hit me so badly, I’ll just stand there and take it. Don’t do that fucking nonsense again.”
“It’s not that I want to hit you.” Her voice shakes and she clears her throat. “I don’t want to hurt you either, but you’re a provocative asshole who never takes me seriously.” She touches my hurt cheek. “Is it very painful?”
“I’ll survive.”
“Come on.” She pulls up on the corners of my lips with her forefingers. “I won’t do it again. Can you stop with the long face?”
I don’t even know why I’m so fucking enraged about this.
No. Actually, I’m well aware of the magnitude of these emotions.
When I thought Sasha had died, a part of me believed it was because of me, and that only made me spiral further out of control.