I repeated this every time my line went out. I pushed, and I pushed hard, until the final horn went off, signaling the end of the game.
We won, 4-2 and I scored two of those goals. I assisted one other.
The team must’ve planned it because as we went through with the other team, my own team circled around and each one went past me. They hit my shoulder before going to Titi and rattling the glass in front of her. She was going crazy. Tiny arms in the air. Her cheeks were red. Dried tears on her face, but I knew they were from the game, from happiness. That’s how she was. She’d also head to bed as soon as the game was done, because this would exhaust her for the next two days.
I was the last one to go over. I pulled my helmet off as I stopped in front of them. My mom stood, pointing to the bench section and back to Titi. I frowned, not sure what she was asking, but nodded. I started back there, and once I saw my mom picking Titi up, her tiny legs dangling helplessly before she tucked them in. I knew what she wanted, what Titi wanted, and my sister’s eyes were wide and unblinking. She wasn’t looking away from me.
I tried smiling at her but had to turn away.
Jesus.
I was emotional.
My mom carried my sister to me, a blanket over her legs, and at the bench section, I stepped in and took my sister into my arms. I waited, my mom fixing the blankets over her legs until she was fully covered, and Titi tried to wrap her arms around my shoulders.
“Settle in. It’s easier to cradle you.”
She did, relaxing back, and I held her like she was a baby.
The guys had gone back to the locker room, but I saw Coach waiting. I gestured to the ice, and he gave me a nod.
I stepped out, my sister in my arms.
The people in the stands had started to disperse, but people took forever so there was a decent amount still standing by their seats. I felt their attention.
Titi was crying, and trying to gasp for breath, but she was smiling so hard while she was doing it.
I did a circle and Titi tipped her head back, beaming up at me. “Again.”
I went again.
“Again.”
I did a third.
By then, the team was back, and they were watching me.
Titi’s hands were in the air, her head fully back as I was holding her, and she wiggled. “Again, Cruz. Again!”
I went a fourth time. This time, the team stepped on the ice and skated with us.
She saw the guys and began trying to sit up. She wanted to see them now.
I jerked my chin up at Labrowski, “One second.”
I went back to our mom, and she saw what was going on. She came down and helped me adjust Titi so she was sitting more upright but I could still hold her securely. The blankets were wrapped around her legs again. Before I went back on the ice, she leaned forward and said to Titi, “One last time. That’s it.”
“But–”
“Your brother is tired.”
That quieted Titi, and she leaned back against my shoulder this time.
One last round and the guys went with us. Titi watched the whole time, waving her hand at them. Half the guys were waving back. They didn’t know what else to do. That was Titi. She was three feet from someone and waving like they were three miles away, you waved back. You had to. And you were smiling because she was beaming like she just saw the world for the first time.
I took her back when we were done.
Titi wrapped her arms around my neck. “Love you, Cruz.”
I hugged her, kissing her forehead. “Love you back, Titster.”
She giggled, and I was guessing it was Dawn, her new helper, who stepped in and took her from me. She was put back in her chair and covered all up so she wasn’t chilled. I waved a last time as the girl started to push her toward the wheelchair accessible entrance.
My mom held back, wiping tears away from her face.
The guys trailed past me, going to the locker room again.
My coach was last, stopping beside me before giving my mom a nod. “Ma’am.”
“Thank you for tonight, Coach.”
He grinned faintly. “I’ll give you a moment.” He said to me, “You got the night off.”
“Thanks, Coach.”
When he left, my mom stepped closer and gave me a hug. She squeezed me so hard, whispering to me, “I love you so much.”
“Love you too.”
My mom sighed, stepping back, “I need to go and help Dawn.”
“Titi will be exhausted.”
“She’ll fight it as hard as she can, but you know how tired she’ll get. She’ll be zonked until Monday, but it was worth it. No game tomorrow?”
I shook my head “One and done with this team. We’ll get them on the next rotation. Thanks for coming.”
“Thank your coach for helping make it happen.”
“He didn’t know Titi was my sister.”
“All the more reason to thank him.” She gave me a last hug, saying again, “Love you and so proud of you!”
A third hug before she pulled away, hurrying toward where Titi was taken. Normal circumstances, they’d get a hotel and I could see them tonight or in the morning, but not with Titi. They had a two-hour drive back home because she’d need her bed and her specialized equipment. She always slept better in her own bed.
“She’s gotten smaller. I didn’t know that could happen.”
I tensed, not able to believe she’d approach me now.
Sabrina Burford, who went to my high school, was standing on the other side of the plexiglass. Her face was ashen, and I saw her blink back some tears before she tried wiping them away.
A rage of fury began rolling through me. “Eat shit, Sabrina.”
I headed in, knowing she better not gasp in outrage. She should’ve been expecting my response, especially after tonight.
She didn’t, but I was in a mood.
I wanted to get drunk and fuck the rest of the night. I wanted to forget the reason my sister was how she was.
After getting to the locker room, showering and changing, I texted Mara.
Me: I need a full night.
There’d be parties galore going on tonight, but she responded as if expecting my text.
Mara: I’m at your truck.
24
MARA
He had showered, and he was dressed in a hockey sweatshirt and jeans. He looked edible, but I saw him in there. Saw her. Saw how he loved her, and my chest burned from envy. I had no idea what it was like having a family member love you as much as he loved his sister, or how much she loved him.
And his mom. She was everything my mom wasn’t. Giving. Loving. Enduring.
Could see that in two seconds.
I knew he’d need something. His sister was half asleep before she left the arena. The high she had, she’d crash, and he would know that. As he approached me at his truck, I saw it was eating him up.
He blew out a ragged breath, seeing me. He stopped, almost glaring before raking a hand through his hair.
There was tension between us. Had been since he found out about my ex, ramped up the night I got mad about the puck bunny. It was simmering under the surface the whole time. The sex was good, but there was a harder element to it than normal. An edgier element, like he was punishing me. I got it. I did. A part of me was punishing him, too.
But, I needed him as much as he needed me tonight.
“The guys want to celebrate.”
I gave a nod. “You said a full night. I’m yours for the night.”