My breath hitched. “You promise?”
He nodded. “I promise.”
Moments later, Joey’s legs gave out beneath him, and he went crashing to the floor.
I CAN’T GO IN THERE
JOEY
Drifting in and out of consciousness, I could hear two familiar voices going back and forth around me.
“This car is a bucket of shit.”
“I know.”
“Seriously, your dad’s a mechanic and this is the best he can come up with?”
“Just shut up and drive, Podge.”
“Shutting up now.”
“Molloy.” Lips mashing together, I twisted my head to one side, and groaned in approval when my nose burrowed between her warm thighs. “Mm.”
“Shh, Joe, it’s all good,” she soothed, stroking my cheek with her hand, as she cradled my head in her lap with the other. “Just sleep it off, okay?”
Obliging the wonderful fucking voice that belonged to the best face I’d ever seen, I let my eyelids flutter shut, and nuzzled into her warm lap, feeling safer than I had in years.
Maybe ever.
“You make me feel safe.”
“Oh, Joe.”
“I love you so fucking much it hurts.”
“I know, baby. I love you, too.”
“Don’t send me away again, Molloy.”
“I won’t, Joe.” Her hand was on my hair again. “Shh, now. Just sleep it off, baby.”
“What did he take?”
“Some type of powder.”
“Crushed oxy?”
“Don’t think so. Something stronger.”
“Coke?”
“He’d be bouncing off the walls.”
“True.”
“I think it might be heroin.”
“No way. He’s not that reckless.”
“Can you snort heroin?”
“Shit, Aoif, I don’t know.”
“Neither do I.”
“Fuck.”
“Listen, I need you to do something for me. I need you to search his room. Go through every pocket of every pair of jeans you can find. Search his wardrobe. His chest of drawers. His nightstand. Every drawer. Every fucking inch of his bedroom. His school bag. His gear bag. There’s a hole in the side of his mattress. Check that, too. He’s using again, which mean he has a stash. Whatever you find, flush it. Can you do that for me?”
“You’re not coming inside?”
“I can’t go into his house, and I can’t bring him back to my place like this. Not with my mam at home.”
“It’s grand, Aoife. I’ll look after him. You know the drill. He needs to sleep it off. He’ll be grand after a few hours kip.”
“Don’t leave him, okay? Please, Podge. Not when he’s like this.”
“I won’t.”
“I mean it. Because he could get sick in his sleep and choke on his—"
“I won’t leave him, I promise.”
FROM BAD TO WORSE
AOIFE
Mam was waiting for me at the front door when I got home from school on Tuesday evening.
“Well?” she asked, tone hopeful, as she stepped sideways to let me inside. “Did you tell him? Is he coming over?”
Yes, I told him, but he was on another planet and didn’t hear a word of it.
Shaking my head, I dropped my bag in the hallway, and hung my coat on the banister, feeling thoroughly deflated.
“Aoife.” Her expression fell. “You need to tell the boy.“
“I know,” I quickly cut her off, moving for the kitchen, as my body thrummed with anxiety. “I tried. He was busy.”
Busy losing his mind.
“We’re all busy, Aoife,” Mam offered, closing the front door and trailing after me. “There’s never going to be a right time to have this conversation, but it has to be done.”
“I know,” I repeated, shoulders knotted with tension, as I rummaged in the fridge. “I tried.”
“Do you want me to talk to him for you?”
“What?” Slamming the fridge door shut, I swung around to gape at her. “No, Mam. Jesus!”
“If you don’t tell him soon, it’s only going to make matters a million times worse.”
My eyes narrowed. “I’m trying, Mam, but it’s not something that spills off the tongue easily, okay. What am I supposed to do, huh? Just blurt it out in class?”
“You should call him,” Mam said, moving to place a reassuring hand on my shoulder. “If you can’t tell him face to face, then do it over the phone.”
“Mam, I already tried.” Swallowing down the lump in my throat, I implored her with my eyes to understand. I felt broken enough from this afternoon’s shit storm without my mother pouring on the pressure. “Just let it go, okay?”
“You need to do this, Aoife,” she pushed. “You have the hospital on Friday and Joey needs to be there. He needs to know that he’s about to become a father. He has rights, you know.“
“A father?” Kev deadpanned, and I swung around to find him standing in the kitchen doorway.
“Kev, you really shouldn’t eavesdrop on people,” Mam admonished, pressing her hand to her chest, as she scolded my brother. “It’s not nice.”
“Joey Lynch is going to be a father,” he repeated, eyes locked on mine. “Which clearly means you’re going to be a mother.”
“No, I’m not,” I lied, red-faced and flustered, as I stepped around Mam and moved for the kettle. “Don’t be thick.”
“I’m not thick,” my brother was quick to shoot back, stalking into the kitchen. “I happen to be your twin, you know? I could sense something was off with you for a while now.” He shook his head. “And now it all makes sense.” He turned and glared at Mam. “The two of you have been joined at the hip for days now. Whispering and sneaking off together,” he sneered. “Because she’s pregnant.”
“Stop saying that,” I strangled out, feeling weak. “It’s not true.”
“Bullshit,” he argued, tone vehement. “You’ve been a nightmare to live with for weeks. It’s like mood swing central in this place – not to mention all of the school Mam just let you skip.” He looked me up and down, eyes narrowing in disgust. “It’s because you let that waster get you pregnant?”
“That’s enough, Kev,” Mam warned, speaking up for me when I couldn’t. “You need to back off right now, young man. This has nothing to do with you, so just drop it.”
“Nothing to do with me?” he spat, looking furious. “Are you joking? I live here, too, you know. If she’s bringing a baby into this house, then I have a right to know, and so does Dad.”
“Stop it,” I begged, feeling the blood drain from my face. “Just stop talking, Kev.”
“At first, I thought you were just getting fat, but now it makes sense. All the weird food you’ve been eating is because of pregnancy cravings.”
“Kevin!”
“You can’t even deny it, can you?” he argued, ignoring our mother’s protests, and keeping his furious eyes on me. “Because there’s no denying that belly you’ve been trying to hide.”