“Did you have sex with her?”
“What?” He stopped walking and swung me around to look at him. “No, I didn’t have sex with her. Why would you even ask me that?”
“Don’t get all high and mighty on me,” I laughed, playfully shoving his chest. “I know you’ve been with girls in the past.”
Darren sighed heavily. “Not like that, I haven’t.”
“Well, I think she likes you,” I offered up, falling into step alongside him once again. “She was looking at you with those gooey eyes.”
“Gooey eyes,” Darren chuckled. “You’re a dope.”
“She was,” I laughed. “I’m surprised she didn’t swoon when she saw you.” Clearing my throat, I pressed a hand to my forehead and mimicked, “Oh, Darren Lynch. Is that you my eyes can see? Be still my beating heart!”
“You’re such a little shit,” my brother laughed.
“And you’re a dark horse,” I shot back with a wink, ribbing him with my elbow. “Got anymore blondes lurking around school, waiting to fall at your feet? Because I’ll be happy to take them off your hands.”
“Pack it in,” he chuckled, with a rueful shake of his head. “Honestly, it’s not like that. She’s just a good friend.”
“Don’t worry, Dar,” I laughed. “I know you’re gay. I’m only messing with ya—“
“Jesus Christ, Joey!” Darren hissed, clamping a hand on my shoulder. He looked around us, eyes wild and panicked, before he released a breath and muttered, “Not so loud, okay?”
“Why do you do that?” I demanded, good mood forgotten, as I shook his hand off, feeling my temper rise. “Why do you hide who you are?”
He shook his head, blue eyes laced with pain. “Joey.”
“No, it’s bullshit, Dar,” I pushed, unwilling to let it go. “I’m not ashamed of you, and you shouldn’t be either.”
“I’m not ashamed of myself,” he replied quietly.
“Well, good,” I snapped. “Because you don’t have shit to be ashamed of.”
“Yeah, well, according to Dad, I have.”
“Yeah, well, fuck Dad,” I spat. “He’s the one who should be ashamed of himself, not you.”
“You do realize that up until six years ago, being gay was a punishable crime in this country?”
“Yeah, and so were condoms and any other form of birth control,” I growled. “Which just goes to show that the laws are bullshit.”
“Joe…”
“This country is backwards, Darren, you know that,” I argued. “Yeah, it’s getting better now, but we both know that the foundations on which our laws are built upon have a lot less to do with common sense than religion.”
“I really don’t want to talk about it, Joe.”
“Well, I don’t want to see you walking around the place with your tail between your legs when you have no reason to,” I countered. “It’s bullshit, Darren. Every word that comes out of that man’s mouth is utter bullshit, so don’t let him make you feel bad about yourself. Dad’s living in the dark ages, so don’t you dare let him drag you back there with him.”
“What do you propose I do, Joey?” he asked in a weary tone. “Go toe to toe with him?”
Yes. “You can take him.”
“No, I can’t,” he replied. “Besides, not every disagreement in life has to result in a dog fight.”
“In our lives it does,” I corrected hotly. “So, you better get your head in the fight and make damn sure that you’re the biggest dog.”
“Like you, squeaky?”
“I might not be the biggest dog in the fight,” I begrudgingly conceded. “But I always have the sharpest teeth.”
“Kind of like the saying; it’s not the size of the dog that matters, it’s the fight in the dog?”
I nodded. “Now you’re speaking my language.”
Darren gave me a strange look. “So, in your mind, it’s a dog-eat-dog world that we’re living in?”
“It’s not in my mind, Dar. It’s a fact.”
“You know,” he mused in a melancholy tone. “I can’t figure out if that backbone of yours will be your saving grace or your downfall.”
“Whichever way it goes is fine by me,” I said with a shrug. “Because I couldn’t care less.”
“That’s not true,” he argued. “You care.”
“No,” I laughed humorlessly. “I really don’t.”
“I need you to start caring, Joey.”
“I care,” I grumbled. “I care about you, and Shan, and Tadhg, and Ols—“
“I need you to start caring about you, Joe—”
“Holy shit.”
My feet came to an abrupt stop the minute my eyes landed on a tall blonde, with the face of an angel, sitting on the wall at the entrance of the school.
“What?” Darren demanded, looking around us. “Where’s the fire?”
“There.” Struck dumb at the sight of her, and with all notions gone of continuing any further conversation with my brother, I pointed to the girl whose long blonde hair was splaying all around her in the breeze. “Her.”
“I don’t know her,” my brother noted. “She must be a first year.”
Looking like nothing my eyes had ever seen, I watched as she sucked on a Chupa Chups lollypop, entirely uninterested in the lad attempting to talk to her, while her long legs dangled from the wall.
“Jesus Christ.” I blew out a breath. “I don’t care if you’re gay or not, lad. You can’t deny that girl is the best-looking thing your eyes have ever seen.”
It was at the exact moment in time that her gaze flicked to mine.
The minute our eyes collided, I felt a pang of heat shoot straight to my chest.
Holy fuck.
When I met her gaze head on, I fully-expected her to blush and look away.
She didn’t.
Instead, she tilted her head to one side and studied me with a similar look to the one I was sure that I was sporting.
Arching her brow, she slowly removed the lollypop from her mouth, and gave me an expectant look.
My gaze flicked questioningly to the dark-haired lad still trying and failing to garner her attention before returning to her face.
With a defiant tilt of her chin, she gave me a look that said what are you waiting for?
Well shit.
What was I waiting for?
“Steady up, baby brother,” Darren chuckled, as he forcefully walked me up the path towards the main building and away from the blonde. “She’s cute, but don’t throw your hat in the ring just yet. I promise there will be fifty more girls in your year that look just as lovely.”
Doubtful.
“I don’t want fifty more girls,” I replied, twisting back to find her still watching me. “I just want that girl.”
“Oh, to be a first year again.” Laughing, Darren dragged me along with him until she was out of sight. “If I’ve taught you nothing else these past twelve years, then remember this; keep your temper in check, your head in the books, your ass off the streets, and your hands off girls that look like that.”