Frowning over his response, I soak in the way his features softened. He likes Rachel, respects her maybe. Yet, it seems like whatever they have going on is on two different levels of understanding.
“I don’t like your father,” he continues, brushing his knuckles across my jaw. “But I don’t hate him either. He distracts my mom.”
Swallowing is hard with my heart lodged in my throat. “You talk to her more. That must mean you want something from her. She loves you so much.”
His touches stop, his knuckles lingering against the edge of my chin. He doesn’t make eye contact with me, but his gaze drifts across every piece of my face like he’s looking for something, searching.
“I do it for you,” he hums under his breath.
Without another word, he settles on his side and draws me into him. My shoulder presses against his chest, and I don’t bother fighting him when he repositions us so we’re both laying on our sides. This time we’re facing each other, but I can’t look at his expression.
I focus on his shirt, the way his chests rises and falls, and I exhale slowly. “Why did you bother coming here? Be honest.”
His hand finds mine between us. He guides my palms to his chest and leaves them there, curling one of his arms around me until our bodies have no room left between us. Without mobility of my hands, I can’t push him away.
Do I want to?
We spend a while listening to each other’s breathing. After enough time passes, I settle into the bed, letting one hand drape around his side and the other fall onto the mattress.
“You didn’t say goodbye,” he whispers.
I close my eyes and breathe in his scent.
“I was coming back.”
His silence tells me what I already know.
He doesn’t do well with goodbyes either.
The longer we lay in silence, the more my body settles back into comfort until my lids get heavy. I’m half asleep when I feel his hand go to my hair and brush some behind my ear. I’m too tired to worry about what his touch will do to the fragile strands.
He leans toward me. “I was worried about you, Em. That’s why.”
His voice fades.
The room fades.
But his warmth lulls me to sleep.
Chapter Twenty-One
I wake up alone by the time the sun is finally up. It takes me a while to get my stiff limbs to cooperate enough to stretch and climb out of bed. After changing into leggings and a sweatshirt, I head to the kitchen where I smell bacon.
To my surprise, Kaiden is at the table with a plate of pancakes in front of him. Grandma smiles at me when I walk in and transfers a few of the fluffy cakes on a plate for me, along with some fruit on the side. Glancing at the empty seat next to Kaiden and the one at the opposite end that Mama usually sits in, I weigh my options.
I sit in Mama’s seat.
“How did you sleep, Emmy?” Grandma finishes cooking before turning off the burners and joining us at the table. She sits between Kaiden and I, poking at the eggs on her plate.
“Um…” I clear my throat, not making eye contact with Kaiden. “Good. I slept good.” I stab a strawberry and pop it into my mouth, looking over my shoulder at Mama’s open bedroom door. “Where is Mama?”
Grandma hesitates. “She left for work already. She mentioned something about an early meeting with the school.”
I press my lips together and nod.
I focus on my pancakes, when Grandma adds, “Tomorrow is the last day before break for them, so she’ll be home the rest of the week.”
There’s so much hope in her voice, and I wonder if she believes everything will be okay. Mama has always been great at avoiding me when she wants to, and I doubt now is any different than when I lived here.
My voice is quiet. “Good.”
Kaiden sees right through my false brevity. When I glance up, his head is tilted to the side as he studies me. His plate is already half empty, so I wonder how long he’s been up.
I fidget in my chair. “What are your plans today, Grandma? Do you still see Betty across the street?”
She smiles. “The two of us planned on doing some shopping later today. If you’re interested in tagging along, I’m sure she’d love to hear all about your new school.” She gives Kaiden a small nod. “You’re welcome too, of course.”
To my surprise, he smiles back. It looks weird on his face, considering there’s usually a scowl in its place. “Em actually told me she’d show me around town.”
Grandma’s sculpted white brows arch before she looks at me. “Did she now?”
Kaiden’s lips waver. “Yeah, she told me she’d show me her favorite spots. I’ve been looking forward to it since she said something last night.”
Closing my eyes, I internally sigh. I don’t go anywhere besides the bookstore, and that’s been closed for a month now according to their website.
Grandma hums out a non-committal reply, amusement spattered on her face. The corners of her lips are crinkled in a barely-there smile, but I know she knows.
I cut my pancakes. “These are good.”
“You say that a lot,” Kaiden responds.
I peek up at him. “Say what?”
“Good.”
“What’s wrong with good?”
“It’s a lie.”
Grandma laughs. “You two are interesting together, I’ll give you that.” She scrapes her chair backwards, grabbing her plate and standing. “I’ll leave you to it, then.”
Together? “Grandma—”
She gently pats my shoulder before walking out of the room.
Kaiden is grinning from across the table.
“What?” I grumble, picking at my food.
“So, you slept well, huh?”
I’m silent.
“Didn’t wake up at all?” he presses.
My shoulders drop. “Why did you tell her I was showing you around? She knows that you’re lying.”
He seems genuinely surprised. “How would she know I’m lying?”
Shaking my head, I push around the fruit before setting my fork down. “I never got out much when I lived here, okay?”
He snorts. “Did you ever have a life? You don’t do anything in Exeter either.”
My nostrils flare. “There are reasons.”
His fork clinks against the glass plate, causing me to stare at his waiting expression. “I have all day, Mouse. What aren’t you telling me?”
Narrowing my eyes, I scoff. “What aren’t you asking, Kaiden? You’re so worked up over your own bullshit that you don’t ask anyone about themselves. You assume.”
“That isn’t—”
“Don’t lie,” I cut him off. “You make stupid assumptions about everybody and everything. You shut down when things don’t go your way and you blow up when people try to help. Yet, you never ask anybody about anything that’s relevant because you’re trapped in your own little world.”
His lips part, but nothing escapes them.
Taking a deep breath, I focus on finishing breakfast before tackling the rest of the day. I don’t want to go shopping with Grandma and Betty, but I also don’t want to chauffer Kaiden around. He’ll complain about how little there is to do here or give me crap about my only true happy place being a musty old bookstore that has more dust than books on the shelves.