He releases me slowly, as if it pains him to do so. And then he’s gone, striding toward the captain’s cabin. Technically, I’m supposed to be headed down to the crew’s quarters, but I follow my instincts and circle around to the helm instead. In the time that we were aboard the Audacity, I saw Nox there more often than Hedd. If the captain spent the last day partying like Bowen suspects, I bet he put them in charge.
Sure enough, I find them leaning against the wall with their eyes closed. Sleeping? Not sleeping? I’ve seen what they can do with their elemental magic, and I have no desire to be on the other end of that. “Nox.”
Their eyes fly open and the breath is jerked from my lungs. It happens so fast, I don’t have time to even make a choked sound. I claw at my throat, but it’s not my body betraying me. It’s Nox’s magic.
“What the fuck are you doing here?” They grab me by the throat and spin around to pin me to the wall. Only then do they allow me to breathe. Barely. “You should be at the safe house recovering. I expected Bowen to have a death wish, but you seemed much more practical. It’s a pity I was wrong.”
“I think so, too.” My voice is so raspy, it’s nearly incomprehensible.
“I’ll ask you one last time.” Menace radiates off them in waves. “What are you doing here?” This is not the charming, flirty pirate I interacted with a handful of times on the trip here. This person is dangerous. If I don’t find the right words, I have no doubt that they’ll kill me.
I spent a lot of time on the ride over considering all the charming, manipulative things I can say to get them on our side. They all fail me now. There’s only the truth. “We came to kill Hedd and his supporters. We want to know who’s running the network of safe houses, because there is a network; don’t tell me there isn’t. We want to help—by serving on a crew that’s loyal to the cause, not the C?n Annwn. Like you. Like the people on this crew.”
Nox’s face gives nothing away. “Not all of them.”
“Not all of them,” I agree. My lungs finally feel like they’re fully expanding again. It’s everything I can do not to suck in great inhales. “But those loyal to the C?n Annwn aren’t the reason you haven’t taken over, are they? It’s Hedd.” If Bowen wasn’t entirely sure he could take the captain in a fight without losses, then there’s no way Nox can do it.
They all but confirm my suspicion when they lean in close, pressing harder on my throat. “Regardless of what you think you know, that motherfucker is damn near unkillable. As long as he is captain of the Audacity, things will remain the same.” They push me away with a disgusted sound. “You came back here for nothing. All you’re going to do is die.”
I really fucking hope they’re wrong. “And if we don’t die? If we succeed, will you help us?”
Whatever response they may have had is lost in a roar that I swear shakes the very boards beneath my feet. It’s the only warning I get before the door to the captain’s cabin blows off its hinges and crashes into the sea. A body flies through the air and hits the railing hard enough to splinter it. He staggers to his feet, and I have to press my hands to my mouth to stop myself from crying out.
Bowen.
He looks like shit. Hedd obviously got off a few good punches, because one of his eyes is already swelling shut, and he’s bleeding from the mouth. He’s steady on his feet, though. That has to mean something. It has to.
The being that comes through the door is barely recognizable as human. I thought we saw the full transformation into berserker in the fight against the mermaids, but that obviously wasn’t true. Hedd is easily seven and a half feet tall, and broad enough that he has to come through the door sideways. Each of his meaty arms have doubled in size, but they’re not perfectly proportioned. He looks like a clay doll that a child molded into the approximation of a warrior. That lack of grace should slow him down, at least in theory, but he’s fast on his feet. Too fast.
He charges Bowen, and even as I scream, it’s already too late. They collide in a crash of limbs and topple through the splintered railing and into the water.
CHAPTER 34
Bowen
I EXPECTED HEDD TO BE DAMN NEAR COMATOSE FROM PARTYING. That’s what made me hesitate. Even now, even hating him as much as I do, the thought of murdering a man in cold blood was one step too far. That moment of hesitation cost me.
Now I’m sinking to the bottom of the fucking sea with Hedd’s hands around my throat in an unbreakable grip. I pummel him in his face, but I might as well be punching the tide. He doesn’t feel it. If I’m doing any damage, it’s so minuscule as to be nonexistent.
The fucker doesn’t care that he’s drowning alongside me. Or maybe he’s not. I always suspected that in his berserker form, he can hold his breath for significantly longer than a normal human. It’s the only reason I can think of that Nox hasn’t killed him yet.
None of that is helping me right now, though.
Even with the thin shield of my power protecting him from crushing my throat, he’s doing a damn good job strangling me. Black spots dance across my vision. A handy trick, that, considering we’re surrounded by blackness at this depth.
Desperation is a live thing inside my chest. I can’t afford to lose control. We’re too close to the ship. I may not have killed the crew last time, but there’s no guarantee I can avoid it if it happens again. Even with my weakness, I could slaughter the lot of them on accident. I could slaughter Evie.
I have to … I need to …
The cold pressure of the depths presses against me as hard as Hedd’s hands. And we just keep sinking. His body is denser than a human’s. He’s acting the part of an anchor, pulling me down. He can survive this pressure. I don’t think I can. Not for much longer.
There’s no help for it. I have to strike now.
I press my hands to his chest and give a soundless roar of my own. I channeled my power into his ribs and sternum and heart, wave after wave after wave. It’s like fighting a mountain. But even mountains crumble eventually. On my fifth blast of power, Hedd’s grip weakens on my throat. I hit him again twice more for good measure. The final blast since his body is spinning away from me into the depths. I don’t have time to make sure I finished the job.
My lungs shriek for oxygen and my limbs feel leaden and slow as I start to fight my way to the surface. In desperation, I use my magic to propel me, but I’m once again dancing too close to my limits. It sputters in fits and starts. Or maybe that’s my brain slowly losing control.
Fuck. I always knew there was a possibility I would die by drowning. It’s a reality for anyone who lives their life at sea. But I don’t want to go out like this, not so soon after finding Evelyn. For all that she holds half my heart, there’s so much about her I don’t know. A lifetime of little details, each a treasure to unveil and discover. I’ll never get a chance now.
The water shifts around me. I tense, sure that Hedd has somehow come back from the dead to finish the job. But there’s no one around me. Only the water moving under my body and pushing me upward. Faster and faster until my upper body breeches the surface. I choke and gasp and frantically fight to ensure I don’t go back under, but the water is solid beneath my feet.