He moans against my lips as I kiss him back, my hands roaming over his back impatiently. I’ve never felt this restless before, this needy. Silas kisses me harder and grinds his hips against mine, igniting a new type of desire in me. He’s hard, and knowing he wants me that badly has me feeling something I’ve never felt before. It makes my awkwardness melt away, and I slip my fingers underneath his t-shirt.
“Ray,” he moans, pulling away a little to look at me. “You’re going to drive me insane. Do you have any idea how difficult it is for me to take things slow with you?”
“Don’t then,” I plead.
He leans in and presses a lingering kiss to my lips. “I love you,” he whispers. “I love you so fucking much. I’m done keeping the words buried within. I love you.”
Silas wraps his arms around me and turns us over, so I’m lying on top of him, and I can’t help but giggle as I push myself up against him. I look into his beautiful emerald eyes, my heart racing. “I love you so much more, Silas.”
He smiles at me, and I lean in to kiss that smile right off his face. He’s right. This is a moment I’ll remember for the rest of our lives.
Chapter Twenty-One
Silas
The last couple of weeks have flown by in a daze of happiness overshadowing our sorrows. There are nights Alanna still cries herself to sleep, and more often than not, she dreams of her father, waking herself up with the force of her tears. Despite that, our days are filled with happiness and hope for the future we’re working towards.
I was worried she’d lose her spirit, but she hasn’t. Whenever she gets discouraged, she adds something to her digital scrap book depicting our life together. My crazy girlfriend has already picked out our home and our car, as well as the color scheme for all of it. I can’t wait to someday sit in a living room of our own, her vision come to life.
I check my watch as I head to our room. Alanna should be back any time now. We’ve managed to coordinate her shifts at the supermarket with my work, and we’ve gotten into a good routine. During the day, she goes to school and I attend my lectures, and afterwards we both go to work. As much as we can, we leave our evenings open for each other. We’re blessed that we have Ricardo’s support. While our circumstances aren’t ideal, it could’ve definitely been much worse. We’ve made sure to count our blessings as we work toward a better future.
“Si!”
She walks into our room and smiles at me, her eyes shimmering with love. This will never get old. I’ll never tire of seeing her after a long day.
Alanna runs up to me, and I catch her as she jumps into my arms. Yeah, this will never ever get old. She wraps her legs around my waist, and I turn around with her in my arms, pushing her up against the bedroom door as my lips find hers. She moans against my lips, her body moving against mine as I kiss her, taking my time with her.
“Did you know? I was starting to feel a little tired,” I murmur against her lips in between kisses.
Alanna giggles and captures my bottom lip between her teeth teasingly. “Then let me recharge you.” She threads her hand through my hair and grips tightly, her touch possessive as she deepens our kiss. Alanna’s hands move over my back, her fingers slipping underneath my t-shirt. Things have been moving fast between us lately, and I know she wants more, but I’m worried she’s using lust as a distraction from her grief, and I don’t want her to regret anything between us. I want her to take her time and be really sure. I have every intention of spending the rest of my life with her, so I can wait as long as she needs me to if it means we’re building a solid foundation.
I tear my lips off hers reluctantly and drop my forehead to hers, my breathing ragged. “I desperately need a shower, baby.” A cold one, preferably.
I put her down carefully, and she looks at me through narrowed eyes for a moment, but then she nods. I disappear into the bathroom instantly, my heart racing. This woman will be the death of me, without a doubt. How much longer can I resist her? I want to take my time with her and let her experience every step of a relationship slowly, one after another, but fuck. I want her so fucking badly. It was only last week when I made her come on my fingers for the very first time. I’ll need to be much much more patient.
I let my eyes fall closed as I wrap my hand around my cock, images of Alanna flooding my mind. I don’t think she realizes what it does to me to have her in my space like this. Seeing her wearing my t-shirts, falling asleep with her in my arms, kissing her whenever I please. Then there’s the way she’s touching me lately, her hands wandering every time I make out with her. I thought I’d die when her fingers wrapped around my cock last night. Just one touch, and I’m ready to burst.