I抎 never been separated from my family for that long. A weekend in our lake house had been the extent of it. Suddenly, I was terrified. I was used to having a tight-knit family and always someone to talk to. In the future, I抎 have to pick up a phone, and that meant being careful what I said because you never knew who was listening. I swallowed. Of course, there would be Santino?but he and I weren抰 really on speaking terms right now. I had every intention to change that in Paris, but I wasn抰 sure if our relationship would ever reach a level that would make me feel comfortable sharing problems with him.
A soft knock rang out.
揅ome in,?I called but nothing happened. Instead another soft knock sounded. I got up and went over to the door. I found Bea抯 little face looking up at me when I opened the door. She held her favorite stuffed animal in her arms, a pink pig called Peppa. I抎 watched too many episodes of the series with her to feel the same joy seeing the well-loved toy as Bea did.
揅an I come in??Bea asked with a sweet smile. I opened the door wide. 揙f course.?
Bea tiptoed in almost shyly, regarding my suitcases warily. She bit her lower lip, clutching Peppa Pig even closer.
揑s everything all right??I asked, getting down on my haunches in front of my little sister.
揑 don抰 want you to go. I抣l miss you too much.?
Tears sprang into my eyes. I hugged her tightly. When I抎 made plans to go to Paris, I hadn抰 thought about what that would mean for Bea. She was only five. I抎 miss so much of her growing up while I was gone. I pulled back and pushed her blonde hair out of her eyes. 揑抣l come visit often. And maybe you can visit me in Paris as well. Then we can go to the Eiffel Tower and have hot chocolate in one of the artsy caf閟 near Montmartre.?
揥hat抯 that??
揂 beautiful part of Paris up on a hill. You抣l love it.?
She nodded gravely, then held out her pig. 揟his is for you.?
I took it. 揊or me??
揝o you抣l remember me in Paris.?
揃ut it抯 your favorite.?
She nodded again, looking even more serious. 揑 want you to have it so you won抰 forget me.?
揃ea, I could never forget you. I抣l call often and I抣l send you pretty clothes so we can match even if we抮e not in the same city.?
She beamed up at me. 揥ill you come back for my birthday??
揑抣l come back even before that. I have a long list of events I抦 still supposed to attend, so you抣l see me very often.?
揙kay,?she said, sounding slightly mollified. 揅an we watch Peppa Pig together??
It was almost seven-thirty, Bea抯 bedtime, but I agreed anyway. We settled on the bed together, Bea snuggled up against my side. I opened an episode of Peppa Pig on my iPad. We had already watched it a while ago, but I doubted there was a single episode we hadn抰 watched at least twice. Mom poked her head in a few minutes later, probably wanting to bring Bea to bed.
My little sister had fallen asleep beside me.
Mom smiled, her eyes glistening.
揇on抰 get emotional,?I whispered.
She smiled apologetically as she crept closer to us and perched on the edge of the bed. 揑抣l bring her to her room.?
揕et her sleep here.?It had been a while since she抎 spent the night in my bed. Mainly because she was a restless sleeper and I couldn抰 sleep with her kicking and turning all night. But tonight, I wanted to hold her close.
Mom nodded, then kissed Bea抯 and my forehead before she left. I actually had to push back tears. I hadn抰 thought I抎 feel overly emotional leaving Chicago and my family behind. Not because I didn抰 love them or enjoy being with them, but because I was looking forward to experiencing something new.
And it wasn抰 as if I抎 be alone in Paris. I抎 always have Santino by my side. Though, if he kept up his sour mood, that would probably not be the most pleasant experience.
Dad had come over to my apartment to say goodbye the night before my flight to Paris. Now he was watching me pack my suitcase with an air of silent disapproval that he was a master at.
揧ou know what I think about this. My opinion hasn抰 changed,?Dad said while I tried to shove another pair of pants into my already crammed suitcase. We were of course flying first class so I could have taken three suitcases with me, but I was too lazy to pack that much and so I chose to cram as much stuff as possible into a single piece of luggage.
揧ou haven抰 held back your opinion, Dad. And you know I agree with you. I don抰 want to go and it抯 most likely a bad idea, but as I keep telling you, I don抰 have a choice.?
揥e always have a choice.?
I sighed, giving up on fitting the pants into the suitcase. 揧es, we do. But sometimes the choice is only between pest and cholera.?
揑 could go in your stead. Valentina and Dante trust me. They抣l let me watch Anna.?