He was silent for a moment, as though trying to decide what to say. “Is it not obvious? My heart remains unchanged.”
I thought I would feel nothing but loathing for him. Yet his simply spoken confession stirred something in me. Weak—that was what I was, and I cursed myself for it. Despite the tenderness of his words, I would never forget the vicious things he had done. He had claimed he cared for me, and then taken everything I held dear. If this was his love, I did not want it.
I looked down at the floor, trying to appear confused. Torn. Undecided. “What you said before . . . about us. Our future. My mother. Did you mean it?”
He leaned closer to me, so close, a lock of his hair brushed my cheek. “Are you no longer angry with me?” Though his voice was soft, his stare was watchful and assessing.
I drew a deep breath, trying to calm myself. “I was angry before. Furious. How could I not be after what you had done?” Lifting my chin, I met his gaze. “But you were right. What matters most is my mother’s freedom. It’s why I joined the army, what I’ve worked for all these years. And there’s also—” My voice trailed away then, though I hoped the implication was clear. That he would mistake the heat coloring my cheeks for desire, and not the shame it was.
“You said you could help me free her. How?” I asked urgently, like I was trying to test his sincerity rather than convince him of mine. He would not expect a disadvantaged opponent moving to attack rather than defend. It would be a reckless move, foolish, even. But what did it matter when I had nothing more to lose?
“Once we overthrow the Celestial Kingdom, with the might of the dragons behind us, nothing will be beyond our reach.” His tone was guarded, though his eyes shone startlingly bright.
I forced myself to nod, inwardly seething that he believed the dragons were his to command. Even against their will, even though they might die from serving him so. As though it would be a fair battle tomorrow, instead of the devious tactics he had planned to ambush the soldiers who had fought with him before.
I buried my revulsion in the warm smile on my lips. “Do I have your word?” How it stung, letting him dangle before me the thing I wanted most in the world. More so, because it was still out of my reach.
He blinked slowly, in seeming disbelief. Yet his mind was ever sharp. “Are you willing to sever all your ties with the Celestial Kingdom?” he countered, seeking the slightest crack in my composure.
Did he mean Liwei? I slipped on a mask of indifference. “The Celestial Kingdom means nothing to me. The emperor imprisoned my mother. The empress treated me with spite and disdain. As for their son—” Here, I let a teasing note slide into my voice. “Are you still jealous of him? He hurt me once, and I only helped him after because I hoped he would plead for my mother.” It was what Liwei had accused me of before. Just what Wenzhi might believe given his own lack of scruples.
I stepped closer to him until the silk of our robes grazed. “You were my choice, even before we left to find the dragons. My anger these days past had nothing to do with him, but you—what you did, how you lied to me and broke my trust.” My tone gentled, now low with promise as I tossed my head back. “Oh, I haven’t forgiven you yet—it will take a while. Though it depends . . .”
“On what?” he wanted to know.
“On whether you can make things right between us.”
He stared at me, his arms folded over his chest. I knew that look of his, deep in thought, weighing each word spoken against what he knew. Did he recall the coolness between Liwei and me in the Mortal Realm? My promise to him on the rooftop? The best lies were indeed those steeped in truth.
Finally, he dropped his arms, his expression softening. “Stay with me, and I promise to free your mother once we defeat the Celestial Kingdom. Your family will be mine, too.”
He spoke the words with the gravity of a vow, one which would have brought me such joy just days ago—but now, turned my stomach. Yet hope sparked in me, too, that he had believed my lies. That I still had a chance.
“I will hold you to that.” I drew out each word softly.
His eyes shone molten silver as he raised a hand to cradle my cheek. Our embrace in the mortal village flashed across my mind, when I had craved his touch and longed for more. But I knew what he wanted of me now, and I would not give it to him. I could not kiss him again; I was not that good a liar.
“Shall we have a drink? To celebrate?” I suggested then.
“If you wish.” He dropped his hand, raising his voice to call for an attendant, who entered with a deferential bow.