Mutter Scheck came into the bow triumphant, holding a plate filled with tender, glistening pink. ‘Come, my girls,’ she said. ‘Come and have your treat!’
I glanced at Thea lying next to me. She shook her head.
‘Hanne!’ Mutter beckoned to me. ‘If you’re not quick it will all be gone.’
‘I’m not hungry,’ I said, and I felt Thea relax next to me.
‘Not hungry?’ Mutter bustled over and put a greasy hand to my forehead. ‘You’re quite hot. Thea? You too?’ She eyed us appraisingly. ‘Some meat might do you good. Give you some strength.’
‘Give it to the others,’ I said, lying back down. I felt Thea find my hand and hold it.
‘Thank you,’ she whispered. ‘The smell has been giving me a headache all day. I feel like someone has split my skull with a cleaver.’
‘Do you need some water?’
Thea nodded.
I pulled her mug from its hook and crawled out of the berth to the dipper. I could hear men laughing beyond the curtain, my father’s voice telling Rudolph Simmel to bring the boys on deck down for their share. Magdalena Radtke’s voice urged him to try the trotters. They were her specialty, she was saying.
I filled Thea’s mug and returned to her bunk, my stomach growling.
‘Everyone’s having a lovely time, aren’t they?’ she murmured, hand over her eyes.
‘They do seem a bit happier.’ I passed her the water.
Thea wrinkled her nose as she sipped.
‘What is it?’
She wiped her mouth on her sleeve. ‘Where did you get this from?’
‘The water barrel.’
‘It doesn’t taste right.’
‘Really?’ I took the mug from her hand and placed my lips where hers had been. It was dead water, whiskered water, and my stomach rose in revulsion. I spat it back into the mug. ‘That’s disgusting.’
‘Are you sure it is from the drinking barrel?’
‘Of course.’
‘It tastes poisonous.’
‘Did you swallow it?’
Thea opened her eyes and stared at me. ‘Yes.’
We told Mutter Scheck, who then informed the elders. Only a handful of the water barrels, it turned out, were new barrels. The rest were used and the water, while in store, had absorbed their histories: whiskey, wine, vinegar. There was nothing they could do about it, Dr Meissner told the elders. They must either wait for rain or put up with the taste – or thirst. He was not responsible for the mistakes of the shipping agent.
Uneasiness and displeasure swept throughout steerage as people repeated the doctor’s comments to one another.
Even Mutter Scheck could not hide her contempt. ‘The man is an idiot. He tells us to thirst and then orders us to take rations of salt fish.’
Thea’s headache persisted into the night and the next day, and I blamed the noxious drinking barrel. I asked Mutter Scheck’s permission to go into the main quarters and take water from the open barrels there, and for one and a half days I was able to convince myself that Thea was better for it. But when that barrel was emptied and the next opened, it was worse than the one in the bow.
As days passed and the temperatures grew even warmer, we forgot the taste of purity and blocked our noses by habit. I began to wait until thirst stuck my tongue to the roof of my mouth before picking up the dipper. My stomach swelled. Cramped. I became accustomed to clenching my fists against the narrow walls of the water closet. And I blamed the foul water for Thea’s persistent headache. For five days she grew increasingly listless and distracted, until finally her headache was so bad that she could not stop whimpering from the relentless pain of it. Anna Maria came every day and smoked her bed with juniper, offered her the last of her remedies, but I could see the Wend’s anxiety at having so little at her disposal.
I tried to comfort Thea. At night I held her hand and stroked her hair and fetched damp cloths for her forehead, but the smell of them was the same as the rancid water and she could not bear it. I stole up the hatchway and asked the nightwatchman for sea water. The salt dried to her white hair. I brushed it out with my fingers as she tried to sleep.
‘It won’t be long and we’ll have fresh water again,’ I whispered to her. ‘The wells we dig will be filled with clear water. I’ll plant a pear over yours to make sure it is sweet.’
The corners of her mouth flickered in an attempted smile.
‘It hurts to talk?’
She nodded.
‘Rest, then,’ I said. ‘I’ll stay with you.’