“She’s very ambitious,” I offer.
“Was.” Abbu’s face darkens. “I know you’re on the right track, Ishu.” He places a hand on my shoulder and peers into my face, cracking a smile. As if this is the highest compliment he can give me. It kind of is, from Abbu.
“Thanks, Abbu,” I say. “I’m keeping my head down and staying focused.”
“You’ll tell us what happens with the Head Girl thing?” There’s hope in his voice, and I don’t want to give him more hope and then crush it. So I just nod my head.
When I become Head Girl, I tell myself. I’ll let them know then.
On the bus to school, I put in my headphones and hit shuffle on my Spotify. I want to avoid thinking about the upcoming interview, and somehow find myself on my Instagram page. It’s pretty bare—I’m hardly ever on it. But I’ve been tagged in so many pictures since I started hanging out with Hani. I scroll through the pictures of us on our first date, where we look happy, if a little uncomfortable with each other. Then there are pictures of all of us during our triple date at Captain America’s. I have such a forced smile on my lips that I have to stifle a giggle as I scroll past the photos.
I shake my head and click out of my picture tags. I definitely can’t let myself get distracted this morning, even though I’ve spent equal amounts of time thinking about Hani as I have about this interview.
I’m about to close out of my Instagram when I see a picture of my sister on my feed. I quickly scroll back up to it. The picture is of her and Rakesh, dressed up. She’s in a bright red dress that makes her brown skin glow; he’s in a suit and tie. They’re both grinning with their arms wrapped around each other like this is the best day of their lives.
The caption reads:
thank you so much for the engagement party @gemmabakesscones, couldn’t have asked for a better night or a better bunch of friends to celebrate with. Lucky to be marrying the man of my dreams!
The picture is from last night and was only uploaded this morning. The more I look at, the more I feel a lump rising in my throat, and a prickling behind my eyes. Did Ammu and Abbu know about this? Were they invited? Or have we got to a point where we don’t even bother inviting each other to big life events like this?
Is Nik really going to get married without Ammu and Abbu? Without me?
This must have been why Abbu was reassuring me that I was on the right track. Ammu and Abbu have given up on Nik. The thought of it unsettles me. Fills me with a kind of dread I’ve never felt before. Sure, I knew that they were angry at her. I knew that she was frustrated with them. I know what Abbu and Ammu are like.
But I didn’t think they were really going to go this far. How could they miss their eldest daughter’s wedding?
By the time Principal Gallagher calls me into her office for the interview, I’m a mess of emotions. My nervousness about the interview and becoming Head Girl has somehow combined with the sudden dread of Nik getting married without the rest of us. I try to take a deep breath and forget about the latter as I step inside the principal’s office and take in her plush maroon carpet and cream walls covered with all kinds of academic certificates. I can’t let my emotions sabotage my chances at Head Girl, even if it suddenly doesn’t feel that important anymore.
“Ishita.” Principal Gallagher gives me a tight smile as I sit down. Ms. Proudman, the guidance counselor, is supposed to be in here with us too, but there isn’t a chair for her. Instead, there are two chairs placed on either side of me, like they’re expecting more people to interview with me.
“Good morning, Ms. Gallagher,” I say hesitantly, trying to maintain my friendliness and politeness. “Um, are we expecting more people?”
Principal Gallagher maintains a tight smile as she takes me in.” Actually, we are … postponing the interview this morning.”
“Oh … then why—”
Before I can ask the question on my lips, the door to the office bursts open and Ammu and Abbu pour in.
“Is everything okay?” Ammu asks, at the same time that Abbu demands, “What happened?” in a gruff voice.
“Mr. and Mrs. Dey, please take a seat.” Principal Gallagher fixes them with that same tight smile and points to the two chairs on either side of me. I feel a sense of dread rising up within me. Something is wrong. Something must be gravely wrong for my parents to have been called in. There’s something sinister behind Principal Gallagher’s smile.
My parents sit down, Ammu on my left and Abbu on my right. But there’s no comfort in having them here. Actually, it feels kind of suffocating, and for some reason all I can think about is Nik and how quick they were to cast her out when she wasn’t exactly who they wanted her to be.