Take this one, now halfway across the room. It’s on its own, which is rare, so it must be some kind of scout. But is it afraid? No. Is it focused? Yes. It probably has a nest of baby ants waiting for it to return with news of a new food source.
This place is clean so it won’t find much, but top marks for trying. I like a trier.
I put my hand up to my head and wish it did not hurt so much. Too much thinking. I am wondering what exactly the police are thinking. How much they really know?
I need to be like that little ant. Keep focused. Keep my thoughts on the road ahead. On the baby ants back in the nest. On the future and the task in hand.
I bet you didn’t know that the worker ants are actually female. That surprised me too. I looked it all up when I was a kid. The queen ant lays the eggs and the male ants die very soon after mating. Then the female worker ants take care of everything.
I remember putting the book down after learning all that and thinking – wow. Realising that you need to look out on the world in an entirely different way.
It’s like my USP now. Knowing all this. Knowledge is power. Once you realise that the females can be in charge and the males had better watch out, you look at everyone differently. You behave differently. You know.
It doesn’t frighten me because I realise that most other people don’t realise all of this. So I have stored the secret away and made myself stronger.
So let me tell you this. I know about the worker ants and the dead male ants and I am not going to let the system beat me.
I am not giving up. I am not letting them win.
I have come this far and I swear on that little ant’s life, I am not giving up now.
CHAPTER 43
THE PRIVATE INVESTIGATOR
Matthew checks his watch. He’s spent more than an hour on campus and has drawn a complete blank. Ahead of him is a large, red-brick building with an impressive first-floor terrace. It has smart glass edging the whole area, and he can see a waitress delivering food and drinks. Good. He skipped breakfast and is starving.
It’s well signposted inside and soon he’s sitting at a table, enjoying the view across the parkland that divides the study halls from the student accommodation. It’s an appealing environment and he wonders if Gemma and her friends have ever sat here. Probably. Almost certainly. Seems a prime spot.
The thought chills him. Gemma in the past – carefree and complete with no idea of what lay ahead.
He closes his eyes to regroup, then opens them to look around properly. He’s surprised at the age range. Mostly mature – clearly not students. He’s just processing this as a waitress appears and he orders coffee, water and a panini.
‘I’m surprised you’re so busy?’ he says as she sets out his cutlery and napkin. ‘I thought everything would be winding down.’
‘Far from it. Conference and summer-school season straight after the graduations. Busier than ever.’ She tucks her order book into the pocket of her black apron. ‘Just as well. I need the overtime.’ And then she’s gone and Matthew realises there’s much he doesn’t know about the rhythm of university life and finances. No wonder the chancellor’s paranoid about the bad press. The question mark still hanging over the inquiry. No wonder she wants tomorrow’s final ceremony. The confidence boost. The signal that life must go on . . .
Across the courtyard in front of the building, Matthew watches a small group of teenagers following a woman wearing a university tabard. She has a clipboard and is pointing out various buildings and then waving her hand towards the blocks of accommodation in the distance. Some kind of open day? Summer course?
The teenagers are asking questions just as his waitress reappears with his order. Matthew leans back as she puts the panini down, thanks her and is just reaching for his cutlery when he looks up to see Amanda staring at him.
‘News travels fast.’ He tries to make his tone light. She’s been very helpful, recommending the counsellor for Amelie, and he doesn’t want to fall out with Amanda. But she won’t be pleased. Him poking around the campus. ‘Do you fancy a coffee? I’m treating myself to brunch.’
‘No time, unfortunately. Just wondered if I can help you?’
‘Oh dear. Am I in trouble?’ Matthew bites into his panini to find it too hot. Melted cheese scorches his tongue and he takes a gulp of cold water. ‘Sorry. Always do that. My wife says it’s because I’m greedy. No patience.’
Amanda smiles and sits in the chair opposite. ‘Some members of staff contacted my office. Said you’d been asking questions again. Just wondered if I can help?’