The confusion in Theo’s eyes flips like a light switch. “Oh. Oh. Because when life gets them down, they keep swimming, so Atlas was saying life will no longer… okay.” His mind is still going a mile a minute behind those eyes. He starts to shake his head as he pushes himself off the floor. “I still think it’s cheesy,” he mutters. Theo’s phone buzzes right as he stands. “I gotta go—my dad’s here.”
Josh is back in the living room. “You aren’t staying over?”
“I can’t tonight; my parents are taking me to a thing in the morning.”
“I want to go to a thing,” Josh says.
Theo is pulling on his shoes when he hesitates. “Yeah, I don’t know.”
“Where are you going?”
Theo’s eyes flash briefly to mine, and then back to Josh. “It’s a parade.” He says it quietly, but also like it’s a warning.
“A parade?” Josh tilts his head. “Why are you being weird? What kind of parade is it? A pride parade?”
Theo swallows like maybe him and Josh haven’t had this conversation, so I’m nervous on Theo’s behalf. But I’ve been around Josh enough over the last several months to know that he values his friendship with Theo.
Josh grabs his shoes and sits next to me on the couch and starts putting them on. “What are you saying? I’m not allowed to go to a pride thing because I like girls?”
Theo shifts from one foot to the other. “You can go. I just… I didn’t know if you knew.”
Josh rolls his eyes. “You can tell a lot about a person by their taste in manga, Theo. I’m not a dumbass.”
“Josh,” I say.
“Sorry.” He grabs a jacket from the closet. “Can I stay over at Theo’s tonight?”
Josh’s casual attitude about this monumental moment between the two of them reminds me so much of Atlas.
Considerate Josh.
But his question about leaving with Theo kind of stumps me. My eyes widen slightly. I’ve only lived here four days. Josh hasn’t asked me permission for anything before, and Atlas and I haven’t really laid ground rules. “Yeah, sure. But let your brother know where you are.”
I really don’t think Atlas will mind. Now that we live together, we’re going to have to tackle things like this when it comes to Josh and Emerson. Who parents who, when, how. It’s kind of exciting. I like figuring out life with Atlas.
My mother still hasn’t returned with Emerson yet, so once Josh and Theo have left, the house is quiet and empty for the first time since we moved in. I’ve never been here alone before. I spend my alone time walking through rooms, looking in cabinets, familiarizing myself with my new house.
My new house. That’s fun to say.
I go out back and sit in a chair on the deck, staring over the backyard. It’s the perfect backyard for a garden. Almost unheard-of for a place this far into the city. It’s like Atlas searched for a house specifically for the perfect garden space just in case I ever came back into his life. I know that’s not at all why he chose this house, but it’s fun imagining he did it for that reason.
My phone rings, startling me. It’s Atlas returning an earlier call with a video chat.
“Hi.”
“What are you doing?” he asks.
“Picking out a spot for my garden. Josh wanted to stay over with Theo, so I let him go. I hope that’s okay.”
“Of course it is. Did they help you at all?”
“Yeah, we got most of it done.”
Atlas looks relieved by that. He runs a hand down the side of his face like he’s releasing stress. It looks like it’s been a busy day, but Atlas tucks it away beneath a smile. “Where’s Emerson?”
“My mom is on her way back with her.”
He sighs like he’s sad he couldn’t get a glimpse of her. “I’m starting to miss her,” he says. The words come out soft and fast, like he’s a little bit scared to admit he’s starting to love my daughter. But I caught his words, and I’m keeping them next to all the other sweet things he’s ever said to me. “I’ll be home in about three hours. Will you be awake?”
“If I’m not, you know what to do.”
Atlas gives his head a little shake, and his mouth ticks up in the corner. “I love you. Be home soon.”
“I love you, too.”
As soon as we end our call, I hear Emerson’s sweet voice, so I immediately turn around. My mother is standing in the doorway holding her. She’s smiling like she caught some of that conversation.