It was Steph.
‘Ollie! Oh my goodness, are you okay?’
‘Um, yes? Why wouldn’t I be? What have you heard?’
‘I’ve heard absolutely nothing! That’s why I spent half the night lying here staring at the ceiling planning your funeral speech, trying to come up with poignant yet uplifting words about how you got eaten by a pack of wild wolves.’
‘There aren’t any wild wolves in the UK.’
‘That’s not the point! I was worried sick!’ Frustration hummed down the airwaves. ‘Have you checked your phone at all in the past twenty-four hours?’
‘I’ve not really had any signal.’
‘You’ve clearly got signal now!’
I checked my phone. Steph had started sending me texts at lunchtime yesterday, and these had increased in frequency and frenzy until midnight. I also had six missed calls.
‘Sorry. If any of these came through I didn’t hear them ring.’
‘How could you not hear them, alone in a forest at night? What else is there to hear? I presume you are in the forest, as planned?’
I flashed back to last night, the laughter, the stories, the animated conversation. My phone had been in my rucksack; there’s no way I’d have heard it.
‘Steph, you know how long my life was controlled by the phone ringing every time I was out by myself. You can’t blame me for turning it to silent.’
‘I’m not your mum, Ollie,’ she huffed. ‘I’m your best friend, sensibly checking in considering you were spending the night alone in the middle of nowhere.’
‘I know. I’m sorry you were worried, but I’m fine. Everything’s fine. Better than fine, actually. If you’re free this evening I’ll tell you about it, but for now I really need to boil some water and find somewhere to do a wee.’
‘So you were alone?’
‘Um, what?’
That woman. She hadn’t raised three headstrong brothers and survived social work for eight years without developing some skills.
‘Again, as your best friend, I’m checking that as well as being alive and well, you’ve not slipped off the No-Man wagon and ended up, I don’t know, camping in Mr May’s garden or something.’
I held the phone away from my ear until I was sure I’d got my voice under control. ‘I can promise you I slept out in the forest, as planned.’
‘Alone?’
‘No, actually, I wasn’t alone. I spent the whole night snuggling a handsome male.’
I could almost hear Steph rolling her eyes. ‘You’re talking about Nesbit, aren’t you?’
Reassured that I was safe, well and sticking to the plan, Steph let me get on with my day on the condition that I called her once I was home. While my stove was heating up water for my tea, I brushed my hair and teeth, then braved another peek at Sam’s decking, where he now appeared lost in his book. Feeling it would be rude to simply pack up and leave, but reluctant to stray towards temptation, I stood at the edge of the fence and called hello.
He immediately came strolling over. ‘Are you joining me for breakfast?’
‘As appealing as that sounds, you know it’s against the rules.’
‘Even though you’ve completed a night alone in the woods?’
‘Was I alone?’ I asked, squinting at him. ‘Or were you camped just the other side of the fence, making sure I didn’t burn down the forest or cause any other incidents?’
He laughed. ‘I was safely tucked up in bed. Scout and Willow would have let me know if anything untoward was happening.’
‘Barked it out in Morse code? Doggy sign language?’
‘Or tapped out a text with their nose. Anyway, my question was, what time is the solo challenge over, and you can hang out with humans again?’
‘Not until I’ve walked home.’
‘Okay.’ Was that a brief flicker of disappointment on Sam’s face, or merely my imagination? ‘I’ll leave you to it, then. Oh, and congratulations! You should be proud of yourself. It’s a big deal, camping in the woods by yourself.’
‘Thanks.’ As Sam walked away, I took a moment to do precisely that – it was a big deal, for me at least. He stopped a few feet from his decking, turning back to call out, ‘Oh – and if you follow the path on the other side of the stream towards the pine trees, there’s some toilets about fifteen minutes away. I presume using my bathroom is also against the rules.’
I wasn’t sure that it was, but I was hardly going to ask him now. I was sure that I wasn’t going to risk relieving myself behind a nearby bush, as originally planned, with Sam’s enormous windows overlooking the forest for miles. Grateful for the information, I drank my tea, packed up and headed for home.