“Ah, Kaikeyi,” he said at last, as if only just noticing me there. “I wished to speak to you.”
“Yes, Raja,” I replied, keeping my head bowed. I grasped our cord firmly in my mind. It was the same thickness as my smallest finger.
“I am headed off to battle in a few days. The warlord Sambarasura has become too greedy, too arrogant. It is time for me to put him in his place.”
“That is all,” he added, when I did not respond. “Have you nothing to say to me?”
I met his eyes, opened my mouth, and discovered that words would not come out. Despite Manthara’s information, I found myself tongue-tied.
Dasharath’s face fell. He turned away from me. “You may go, then,” he said, and the rudeness of the dismissal shook me from my stupor.
“Take me with you!” I blurted inelegantly.
Dasharath turned back around in shock.
“My king,” I added, sending waves of deference and longing through our golden connection. “Please. It would be an honor to accompany you.”
He squinted at me, then reached out and grasped my chin, tilting my head side to side as if searching for something. “You wish to come to the camps?”
“Yes,” I said softly.
“They are filled with men. Soldiers. Far cruder and baser than you are used to.”
I held my tongue, for now was not the time to remind him that I had been raised with seven brothers and had heard many crude and base things. “I can bear it, for the honor of staying by your side.”
Pretty words, flattery. Such things may have been the art of women, but they were the weakness of powerful men. A well-placed strum of the cord between us with my mind certainly did not hurt my case.
“Very well,” he said slowly. “I will consider your request.”
He kissed me then and led me to his bed.
When he was spent, and we were lying beside each other, Dasharath raised himself on an elbow to look at me. “You may come with me to the battle,” he said gruffly. “And you may spend the night here if you wish.”
I wanted nothing more than to leave, to race barefoot to the women’s quarters and climb into my own bed, alone. But I mustered a small smile. “You honor me, Raja. I will gladly stay by your side.”
Soon Dasharath’s breath turned soft and even, and I turned away, my back to him. I willed myself someplace else, in a vast field in Kekaya, astride my fastest horse, and as the imaginary wind whipped through my hair, I found brief haven in sleep’s dominion.
I awoke the next day before Dasharath and slipped away. He did not like company in the morning, and I did not want to risk his good favor. I found my way back to my chambers without incident and sat on the edge of my bed, stroking the cool silk cover beneath my hands.
“Ah, there you are.” Manthara’s voice came from the next room. I jumped, despite myself.
“Manthara?” I called out.
“Who else would it be?” she replied, walking into my bedroom. “When you did not return last night, I assumed you would be accompanying Raja Dasharath today. I took the liberty of packing your garments and ensuring that a palanquin would be prepared.”
“Why—I mean, of course,” I said.
There was no point in protesting to Manthara, who did not have the power to change this arrangement. In Kekaya, palanquins were used only for the elderly and the sick, and it would have brought my father great shame to see me riding in one. But here, a radnyi would never be allowed to ride off on a horse. With a sudden pang, I thought of Yudhajit, imagined how he would have laughed at my predicament.
I banished that thought from my mind and rose. “Do you know when we depart? He told me nothing.”
“Because you need to know nothing.” Manthara put her hands on my shoulders. “You are a radnyi now. Do not worry yourself with details. You managed the hardest part. You persuaded the raja to take you with him. All the rest leave to me. You will depart in a few hours.”
“And what am I to do once I get there? Dasharath will be fighting. Am I to manage his camp?”
Manthara shook her head. “His soldiers will handle that. You are simply there to provide your husband some comfort.” That sounded—incredibly boring. Perhaps Manthara sensed my hesitation, because she added, “Was there something else you wanted to do?”
Now that she asked me, I felt foolish. “I… I want to fight alongside him. I know how, I am not some wilting flower.”
Rather than laughing at me, Manthara only looked thoughtful. “I’ve heard that Raja Dasharath has recently grown dissatisfied with his charioteer. He feels that the man is more interested in proving himself with extraordinary maneuvers than listening to commands.”