Hello, knife to the gut.
That shit smarts, even coming from my sassy daughter.
I watch my phone all night, waiting for a call, for a text to come through that gives me a chance to offer her a real apology.
And just as my little bee predicted, nothing happens.
I stare at the screen until after three in the morning with my eyes bleary and bloodshot before I drag my sorry ass to bed.
Sleep doesn抰 come easy.
Especially when I can smell Eliza.
It抯 all in my head, I know.
My sheets were washed since the last time she was here, but I swear they抮e still tormenting me with her scent.
Heartache is a cruel visitor. It always clings the most when you desperately want it gone.
It reminds me that I抳e done the unthinkable, turning into a lovestruck fool.
Emphasis on fool when I floated the l-word梑y text like a chump梐nd of course she didn抰 return it.
My brain rewards my brooding with a feverish slideshow that tastes like the Hawaiian trade winds and tender lips.
Eliza in my arms.
Her smile in my sunlit eyes.
Her tongue radiating passion in my mouth.
Her legs wrapped around me so tight I抦 going to explode.
I wake up in the worst state梙ard, angry, and exhausted.
I know she hasn抰 called or texted before I bother to look at my phone.
God fucking dammit, I hope she抯 at work today.
Because if she抯 not, Destiny is right.
It抯 over, and then my only option is some high-paid cupid setting me up with another arranged relationship. Because the first one worked out so well.
I sit up and bury my face in my hands, swallowing a groan.
Only six a.m. and I抦 already fucking gutted.
Snarling, I punch her contact and call her.
Silence.
Happy Monday, I text. I抎 greatly appreciate it if you抮e available this afternoon for a quick, informal talk with Gina and myself about our winter drink options. Christmas comes earlier every year.
She doesn抰 respond. Hell, reading that back, I wouldn抰 either.
揑diot,?I mutter.
By the time I抦 showered and heading into work after letting Destiny off at the aquarium, I抦 so tense I wonder if I had a staring contest with a Medusa.
I check my email from the back of the car like always.
There抯 no resignation or nastygram from HR about Eliza yet.
Maybe she抯 just hanging me out to dry.
Should I intrude on her space? Or will that just upset her more?
Yeah, never mind. If I抦 even asking the obvious, it抯 probably too late to worry.
Eliza Angelo has had enough of my shit.
I blew it spectacularly, and now I wonder if I抣l ever be whole.
21
Overcaffeinated （Eliza）
揧ou could just talk to him,?Dakota says, her eyes flashing with amusement.
I抦 on her couch, boneless and staring up at the ceiling.
揌ow will that help again? He抣l either confirm what I already know梬hich is I抦 not good enough for his smug, billionaire face梠r he抣l just say what I want to hear.?
揥hat if it抯 number two??She pours a cup of tea and slides it over.
揙h, God. You抮e making tea for me now? That means it抯 really bad.?My jaw hangs open as I lift the drink and listen to her laugh. I couldn抰 count how many times I made her coffee and scones back when we were neighbors. 揂nyway, you know I抣l just get sucked back in. It抯 a vicious cycle. This is Derek all over again梬ithout Derek.?
揌e抯 not married. I抦 pretty sure he抯 younger and hotter, too.?
揃leh. I抦 not sure if that makes it better or worse. I mean, I抦 not his sidepiece, but at least there was an obvious reason why Derek couldn抰 commit. He had a wife and a family. I抎 almost rather not be good enough for a man because there抯 someone else in the picture than just not be good enough for him period.?
揝o, what do you want to do??She smiles wickedly. 揊YI, I still have that serving spoon ready for his balls. Or even better, I bet I could get Lincoln to snag another trained raven. How does a whole month of getting pooped on sound? Every time he steps outside, I promise.?
揇akota, no. You抮e a mother now. You don抰 get to go full Edgar Allan.?I sigh. 揑 don抰 know, but I don抰 think I can keep working there…？
揙h, crap. Are you sure? This is like your dream job梠r at least a big step to your real dream. Just because it didn抰 work out, it shouldn抰 cost you everything.?
I shrug, wrinkling my nose. 揥hat抯 the alternative? Keep the job at the expense of my dignity? Continue to report to him every day? Half the office gossip already revolves around Cole Lancaster. I抣l have to hear about every new girl he抯 with…？
揑t抯 too early to give up. Linc and I broke up once.?
I laugh. 揌ow could I forget? I was ready to kill him for you.?