It’s rough and impossibly gentle.
Lustful and so much more.
Consuming and not enough.
So we do it again. And again. And I know I will always want Jack Westwood.
Chapter Thirty-One
35 Days Missing
Elodie Fray
In the soft gold light of morning, Jack slides between my legs. We are naked and he is glorious. ‘This is it for me,’ he says, lifting a lock of my hair from the pillow and twirling it between his fingers.
‘What about all the other women?’ I ask, the feminist in me weeping.
‘Placeholders.’
And the relief is absolute because I am not a single fuck, a disposable one-night stand, a toss-away blonde, but more. Something important. Something lasting.
‘I’ve always wanted you,’ he tells me.
‘I didn’t know.’
He snorts.
‘I didn’t!’
‘I knew if we just had some time alone … Away from Crosshaven. Just us. I knew it would fall into place.’
‘Why didn’t you ever tell me how you felt?’
‘I wanted to. Then Noah came along. I was playing the long game. I wasn’t going to risk telling you anything until I knew you were ready.’
‘I thought you were a man of risks,’ I tease.
‘Not when there’s so much to lose.’ He kisses me. It’s long and slow and makes me want more. He murmurs against my mouth, ‘How far will you go?’
‘Mmm.’ I make a dramatic show of thinking hard. ‘Couple of steps?’
He nips my bottom lip playfully. ‘How far will you go?’
I shrug one bare shoulder. ‘Three, maybe four steps … if you’re lucky.’
He sinks his teeth into my skin, and I am whooshed into memories from last night: gripped cotton sheets, skin on skin, and hips moving in a rhythm that’s all our own. ‘How far will you go?’
I give in to him, so he’ll give in to me. ‘All the way.’
He thrusts into me again. ‘Elodie.’ His voice is hoarse with pleasure, as if the word has been dragged from him.
We spend the morning tangled up in each other; vines at the bottom of an olive grove. His arms are around me, thick and strong. I lay my head on his hard chest, feeling the rise and fall.
When he’s asleep, I slip into one of his shirts and go downstairs to make breakfast. All that’s left of the storm is a fine mist of rain and the egg yolk sun spilling lazily across the sky. I’m waiting for the panic of having slept with my best friend, something I’d sworn to everyone, to myself, I’d never do, but it doesn’t come. I’m giddy and happy and full of love. Being with him is as easy as breathing. I can’t believe it took us so long.
I gather all the ingredients for pancakes, but I can’t remember the flour to milk ratio, so I grab Jack’s laptop from his bag and google a recipe. Then, out of curiosity, I google my name. Until Jack changed the fuse the day he came back, I’ve been without TV, totally shut off from the world with no idea what’s being said about my case. I click on the first link. It’s a video … of Jack. His face is freezeframed. I stare at it. At the frown lines between his eyes, drawn in concern, his rumpled hair. Behind him is my house, cordoned off by tape. I see a flash of uniform in the background; a policeman standing by the front gate. Anticipation sours into trepidation because he’s lied to me. He said they’d asked him to film the appeal, not that he’d already done it. Why has he lied?
I hit play.
‘If Elodie was with me now, I’d hold her and never let her go, but we have no idea where she is. It’s the not knowing that’s killing us. Elodie would never take off, she’d never worry anyone like this. He has her somewhere and …’ He breaks off, looks down at the floor, visibly upset. I never knew Jack was such an excellent actor. If I didn’t know the truth, I’d eat up every word, every minor chord in his voice.
‘Allegedly, there was a man harassing Elodie weeks before she went missing,’ says the off-screen anchor woman. ‘What do you know about that?’
Jack looks directly into the camera. ‘I think it was him. The police had the right guy. He’s been following Elodie for weeks. She was terrified. He’s absolutely involved. As soon as they find some evidence, he’ll be locked up. We need justice for Elodie. For her family.’
Suspect … who are they talking about? There can’t be a—
‘And how are the family coping?’
He pushes his fingers back through his hair and shakes his head. ‘It’s been hard. On everyone. And now with Meredith in hospital … it’s all become too much. We just need Elodie home.’