I clutch onto the wheel, running a finger across the sensitive throttle paddle. “Hey, Noah?”
“What’s up?”
“Do you have an extra battery in the garage?”
“Of course.”
“What do you say about testing the car out again?”
Noah smirks. “I thought you’d never ask.”
36
Santiago
Something inside of me changed during my time on the racetrack. It’s as if everything clicked into place for me the moment I drove an F1 race car again. No car in the world can match that kind of speed, and all the fancy cars I have are only cheap imitations of the real deal. I forgot what the high after the race felt like. To have my skin itching from the rush building underneath, begging to be let out.
Driving earlier today fed the part of my soul that was starving for attention. The same part that desperately wanted to feel useful again. To feel needed and wanted.
I struggle with disbelief as I shower and then meet with the crew to discuss test-track statistics. Chloe busies herself with embroidering while I spend time with Noah and James, reviewing tapes and strategies. Every smile she sends my way has my chest warming. Her presence keeps me grounded because my mind threatens to burst from all the information.
I drive us back home from the racetrack on autopilot, not bothering to say a single word. Chloe keeps quiet, staring out of the window, giving me peace. I appreciate her for it. Hell, I appreciate her for all of it. Without her pushing me to be better, I wouldn’t be in the position I am now. I wouldn’t have been able to accomplish what I did without her because she makes life lighter. And it’s about damn time I show her how thankful I am for her.
I pull into the garage and shut off the car. Neither one of us moves for minutes, both trapped in our own heads.
“That was fun.” Chloe breaks the silence, looking over at me with her blue eyes.
I smile. “It was.”
“Do you plan on doing it again sometime soon?”
“I already booked a testing session for tomorrow morning.”
“Really?” Her lips gape apart.
I nod, my grin expanding. “Really.”
She claps her hands together. “I knew you could do it! You only needed to believe in yourself!”
“You were right.”
“Say it again.”
“You were right. Are you happy?”
“Delighted!”
I step out of the car and walk around the hood to open Chloe’s door. “I have something I want to show you.”
She takes my hand, and I pull her out of the seat.
She follows me through the garage and into the house. I keep moving until we stop in front of a door I’ve kept locked for far too long.
She bites her lip. “If this isn’t a Red Room of Pain, I’ll riot.”
“What?”
“Never mind.” She scoffs.
I open the door with the key I haven’t used in far too long. With a flip of the switch, all the lights turn on.
“Oh. My. God.” Chloe steps around me and walks inside.
Trophies of all shapes and sizes line the shelves from floor to ceiling, shining under the spotlights. They’re all the reminders of my past, dusty and neglected after years of abandonment. Pictures of my family, friends, and crew break up the space, displaying some of my proudest moments.
Chloe walks up to a brightly colored trophy resembling an alien spaceship. She runs a finger across the metal, swiping a line through the dust. “Wow. I knew you were good, but I didn’t realize how good.”
My chest puffs with pride. “This is a glimpse at what I did before.”
She sneezes, making a plume of dust fly into the air.
I wince. “Sorry. It’s a bit messy right now.”
“Please don’t apologize. This is amazing.” She gives each trophy special attention, reading off the race and year.
I lean against the wall, enjoying her amazement. Any discomfort I used to feel whenever I entered this room is absent. For the first time in what feels like forever, it doesn’t bother me to be surrounded by my past success. Instead, it fuels the beast inside of me that wants to return.
It’s the reason I came in here today and invited Chloe along with me. Now is the time to consolidate the racer I was then with the man I am now. Rather than fight it, I want to accept every single part.
“Why are you showing me this?” She stops in front of my first World Championship trophy. The massive piece still shines after years of abandonment. It’s the trophy that started my entire journey—the one that not only changed my life path but my sister’s as well.