“Which means it was something you should have told me,” I say through clenched teeth. “What has this relationship been to you?” I ask. “Has it just been about sex?”
“No,” he says quickly. “Lilly, you should fucking know it’s not just about sex.”
“Well, that’s what it seems like to me.”
He steps back, looking insulted. “It hasn’t been about sex. It’s way deeper than that for me. I fucking told you I love you, and I haven’t said that to anyone.”
“Then maybe you don’t know the meaning of love.”
“I do,” he growls back at me. “Because I haven’t said those words to anyone else, means I know how impactful they are, how important they are. I saved them for the right person, for you, because I know, deep in my fucking soul, that you’re the person my heart was supposed to fall for.”
I place my hand on his doorknob and twist it. “If you loved me, then you wouldn’t have left me to fend for myself today. You would’ve realized that today trumped your insecurities, and you would’ve done everything in your power to be there for me. But you weren’t, and as I said, Keller, that’s unforgivable.”
I move past him, open the door, and leave, heading right back the way I came, my eyes puffy and still tearing up as I make my way through the tunnel. When I reach the picture frame, I knock.
Runa opens the door and says, “Coast is clear.” She helps me back into my room, where I sit on my bed, my body feeling empty.
“Here, let’s get you out of this,” Runa says as she carefully takes off my hoodie and sweatpants. The whole time, I stare at the wall. Even as she helps me lie down, I don’t say anything. After I’m tucked in, she sits on the side of my bed and says, “You know, Miss Campbell, it’s within my job responsibilities to take care of you, to make sure you have everything you need, and to be a guide when need be. It’s not a requirement to act as a friend or a confidante. It’s frowned upon to grow too close to the one you’re serving.” She brushes a stray piece of hair out of my face. “But I can’t help but feel drawn toward you. You remind me very much of my sister who I lost just five years ago.”
I look up at her now. “I’m so sorry, Runa. I didn’t know you lost a sister.”
“I did. And she was vibrant and beautiful, just like you. She had the world at her feet, and the possibilities were endless. But with one wrong decision, one dark night, we lost her. I’m trying to tell you that you have the world at your feet with so much to offer to this country. I’m not sure what you might be going through with Keller, who by all means is a wonderful man inside and out, but don’t let the devil swoop in when you have so much promise moving forward. You’re strong, Miss Campbell. You might think you need him, but you never did. A man doesn’t define your ability to stand on your own two feet. Your brain and your heart do. Perhaps continue to use them in the right way.”
I nod, my lips curled in together as I hold back my tears. “Thank you, Runa.”
Chapter Twenty-Four
KELLER
On a deep breath, I walk into Theo’s office chambers and shut the door behind me.
This morning, I received a text from Henrik stating that Theo wanted to see me in his office at seven in the morning, no later. I didn’t have to read into the text to know what it was about.
I was in fucking trouble, because not only did I let down Lilly, but I also let him down yesterday.
I’m still struggling with the conversation we had last night. It was . . . it was eye-opening. Everything she said was right, but she forgot to mention that I was a coward. Sure, I was taking care of security and ensuring everything was in check, but I also avoided Lilly. I knew it was going to hurt her, that she was going to be devastated that I wasn’t there, but I stayed away, for my selfish reasons, and the entire night, that’s all I thought about—how I fucked up—and I’m not sure there’s any way I can make it up to her.
But I plan on doing that.
First thing’s first, apologizing to Theo.
“Take a seat,” Theo says as he points to a chair across from him.
The room is deathly silent as I move across the dark blue Persian rug and take a seat in an upholstered chair that I’ve sat in many times before, but never under these tense circumstances.
“Care to explain where you were yesterday?”
I shift in my chair and grip the armrests. “I was ahead of the parade, ensuring all security was in place.”