‘That’s an excellent question,’ says Mike. ‘Perceptive, gets right to the heart of things. It is all written down, but I don’t always stick to the script.’
‘You’ve earned that right over the years,’ says Joyce, and Mike agrees.
‘Gets me into trouble from time to time though,’ says Mike. ‘They made me go on an impartiality course in Thanet.’
‘Good for you,’ says Elizabeth.
Ibrahim sees Joyce take a sneaky peek at the notebook in her handbag.
‘Do you ever wear any special clothes when you read the news?’ asks Joyce. ‘Special socks or anything?’
‘No,’ says Mike. Joyce nods, a little disappointed, then takes another look at her book.
‘What happens if you need the loo during a show?’
‘For heaven’s sake, Joyce,’ says Elizabeth.
‘I go before the show starts,’ says Mike.
Fun though this is, Ibrahim wonders if it isn’t time to kick off this evening’s proceedings himself. ‘So, Mike, we have a –’
Joyce places a hand on his arm. ‘Ibrahim, forgive me, just a couple more things. What is Amber like?’
‘Who’s Amber?’ says Ron.
‘Mike’s co-host,’ says Joyce. ‘Honestly, Ron, you’re embarrassing yourself.’
‘I do that,’ says Ron. He says this directly to Pauline, who, in Ibrahim’s opinion, had very deliberately sat next to Ron at the start of dinner. Ibrahim usually sits next to Ron. No matter.
‘She’s only been there three years, but I am already starting to like her,’ says Joyce.
‘She’s terrific,’ says Mike. ‘Goes to the gym a lot, but terrific.’
‘She has lovely hair too,’ says Joyce.
‘Joyce, you should judge news presenters on their journalism,’ says Mike. ‘And not their appearance. Female presenters, particularly, have to put up with that a lot.’
Joyce nods, knocks back half a glass of white, then nods again. ‘I do take your point, Mike. I just think that you can be very talented and have lovely hair. Perhaps I’m shallow, but both of those things are important to me. Claudia Winkleman is a good example. You also have lovely hair.’
‘I’ll have the steak please,’ says Mike to the waiter now taking their orders. ‘Rare-to-medium rare, err on the side of rare. Though if you err on the side of medium, I’ll live.’
‘I had read you were a Buddhist, Mike?’ Ibrahim spent the morning researching their guest.
‘I am,’ says Mike. ‘Thirty-odd years.’
‘Ah,’ says Ibrahim. ‘I had been under the impression that Buddhists were vegetarian? I was almost sure.’
‘I’m Church of England too,’ says Mike. ‘So I pick and choose. That’s the point of being a Buddhist.’
‘I stand corrected,’ says Ibrahim.
Mike has started on his second glass of red, and seems ready to hold court. This is perfect.
‘Tell me about this Thursday Murder Club, then,’ he says.
‘It’s fairly hush-hush,’ says Ibrahim. ‘But we meet up, once a week, the four of us, to look over old police files. See if we can solve anything they were unable to.’
‘Sounds like a fun hobby,’ says Mike. ‘Looking into old murders. Keeps you busy I bet? The old grey cells ticking over? Ron, should we get another bottle of this red?’