Something inside me deflates. 揑 assume your client is a congressman??
He nods with a gleam in his eyes. 揑t抯 going to get a ton of press.?
That抯 all he sees right now梩he attention this case will bring the firm梬hile all I see is that I抦 about to become someone like Aronson. I抣l be the person defending Fiducia. It will be me sitting in a deposition implying Lauren is a slut to cast doubt on her testimony. But how much worse is that than taking custody away from Dennis Roberts or telling Sophia Waterhouse how to make sure her ex loses the kids?
I ask my father for the weekend to think about it and he agrees, as if he already knows I抣l say yes. I suppose I already know this too.
揧ou抮e welcome to stay with us, by the way,?he says as I抦 leaving. 揑抦 sure you抣l want your own place eventually, but in the meantime卼hat commute from Manassas will kill you.?
And so it begins. He抯 already finding ways to make this more than a job. I wonder if giving my mom that money was simply another of his tactics, if he gambled on me coming to the firm in response to his show of goodwill.
The air outside is bitingly cold as I walk to the parking garage, the sky solid gray and unyielding. DC goes from one extreme to the next: six months from now it抣l be so humid I won抰 be able to walk down the street without my clothes sticking to me. I抣l miss the weather in LA. I抣l miss other things even more.
It takes an hour and a half in traffic to get back to my mother抯 apartment complex. I groan quietly when I hear voices on the other side of the door. I suppose Ed is here. I抦 not likely to make the best impression today.
I force myself toward the living room卆nd freeze. Ben is sitting on my mother抯 couch梛acket off, collar unbuttoned, hair boyishly rumpled.
The sight of him breaks my heart all over again. I loved him so much. I still love him even now, despite what he did. But I抦 not the same person I was before梙e made sure of that.
揥hy the fuck are you here??I demand.
揙h, Gemma, be nice,?my mother chides. 揌e flew all the way out to talk to you.?
I ignore her. My mother抯 insistence on being nice to everyone has gotten her nowhere. 揧ou flew all this way for nothing, then,?I tell him. 揋et out.?
My mother slides from the room as he rises, his face as angry as mine. 揑f you抎 just answered your goddamned phone, this would have been over last night.?
揑 don抰 want to hear it, Ben! You had your opportunity to talk to me before that fucking announcement and you chose not to.?My voice cracks and I dig my nails into my palms to hold myself together. 揧ou抮e a liar. There were a thousand signs this was wrong梩he way you never invited me over or introduced me to anyone梐nd I ignored them all, but I抦 done ignoring them, so go back where you came from.?
I turn to walk away and he grabs my arm. 揟hey抮e making you partner.?
I stare at him blankly. It can抰 be true and honestly匢 don抰 even want it anymore. Fields intentionally humiliated me yesterday by announcing Ben and Craig抯 promotions at that meeting, so fuck him. I still want to crush the boys?club, but I抣l crush it from the outside in. 揃ullshit.?
揟hey weren抰 going to,?he says. 揑 found out the other night. I agreed to head up the San Francisco office for a year if they made you a partner once we won, but I thought I抎 get a chance to discuss it with you first. I had no clue Fields was going to do that. I really thought the announcement was going to be about you.?
I want to continue believing it抯 all a lie, but he抯 too smart to tell one I could easily disprove.
I shake him off. 揧ou were pulling away. I saw it.?
揘o,?he says, running a frustrated hand through his hair. 揑 was sick over the situation and desperately trying to figure out how to fix things, Gemma. And wishing I could discuss it with you and knowing I couldn抰， not 憈il the case was done. You wouldn抰 even have wanted me to tell you that before we went into the negotiations.?
I want to argue, but he抯 right. If I抎 known, it would have unnerved me. Instead, I went into settlement feeling indomitable and it showed.
揧ou抳e never once invited me to your place,?I insist, as if the whole bit about making partner is irrelevant. And it is. There are too many other pieces of this that don抰 fit. 揧ou didn抰 want me to meet your family or your friends, and then you put off going to HR when I suggested it.?
揧ou spin a story in the courtroom better than anyone I know, but the way you narrate your own life sucks,?he says, eyes flashing. 揃ecause you know why you haven抰 met my friends, and I was the one who brought up HR months ago, so where does that fit into your theory about what a prick I am??
I laugh angrily. 揝o did Kyle. Look where that got me.?