Nothing makes the uncomfortable feeling go away. All my rationalization tactics fail, and I’m stuck staring at the ceiling, wondering if I made the right choice. It sure as hell doesn’t feel like it.
Not even a little bit.
I thought I could get information out of Ani about Zahra’s recovery, but she is ignoring me. Every text I’ve sent Ani has gone unanswered. I’m going a bit crazy since Zahra took a whole week off after she was discharged from the hospital.
All I want to know is if Zahra is feeling better. But Ani didn’t show up to our usual meet-up spot last night, and I was stuck eating my pretzel and hers. The ripple effect of my actions is starting to hit me like a tsunami.
I’ve resorted to stalking my buddy at her workplace because I hate the fact that she’s mad at me. If she were anyone else, I wouldn’t care. But Ani’s grown on me during my time at Dreamland.
“Hey.” I tap on Ani’s shoulder.
She tenses before turning around. “Hi. Can I help you with picking out some candy, sir?”
“Come on, Ani.” I pretend her words don’t bother me.
Her frown adds to the growing tension in my shoulders.
“I don’t want to talk to you.”
“Too bad. I’m your boss.”
She makes a disgusted noise as I grip her elbow lightly and take her to the empty back room of the candy store.
“Spit it out.” She stomps her foot.
The fist around my heart tightens as she shoots me a hard look I’ve never seen on her before.
“I thought we were friends.” Ani and I built a bond over the last few months, and I don’t want her pushing me away. I’ve grown to like her as a friend. The idea of her not talking to me anymore makes me sadder than I care to admit.
She shakes her head. “That was before you hurt my sister.”
“So what? We’re not friends anymore?”
“Nope.”
“You don’t mean that.”
She scowls. “Zahra’s my best friend and you made her cry.”
The inhale I take burns my eyes. “Your sister and I are—”
“Done. She told me.” Ani’s bottom lip wobbles.
“I didn’t mean to hurt you too.”
“I helped you hurt her. With the pumpkins, and New York.” Her eyes shine from unshed tears.
Fuck. Ani feels responsible for my actions? I never meant for her to carry the burden of my decisions.
“None of this is your fault.” I place my hand on her shoulder and give it a squeeze.
“No. It’s yours because you’re a big baby who can’t admit you like her.”
I can’t hold back my sad laugh. “If only life was that simple.”
“You told me excuses are for losers.”
Damn. I never thought she would use my own mentor advice against me. I had told her the same words in the context of trying to move out of her parents’ apartment and become independent.
It might seem like an excuse to her but I have my reasons.
She sighs. “Thanks for helping me and making me feel better about moving.”
Is she seriously trying to give me the brush off right now? “Ani—”
“You’re not my friend or buddy anymore. I quit.” She lets out a heavy breath.
Her rejection stings. I’ve genuinely enjoyed spending time with her. We bonded over many things from being the youngest sibling to our love for pistachio ice cream.