Declan: You both spoke?
Cal: He called me last week out of the blue.
Me: What did he say?
Cal: He asked if I needed help. ME.
Cal: Wonder who I should thank for that awkward conversation? Jim, Jack, or Johnnie?
Declan: I warned you what would happen if you got out of control again.
Not this again. Declan already forced Cal into rehab during college. It’s the trigger point that pushed their already weakening relationship to its breaking point. Declan might have done it out of a place of love for our brother, but Cal has never gotten over it.
Me: Did he ask you anything about your letter?
Maybe he was trying to prey on Cal because he thought he could get the best answers out of him. They’ve always had the better relationship out of us three.
Cal: No. I don’t think he knows about ours.
Declan: Let’s keep it that way.
Good. One less obstacle in my way. The thought of going back to Chicago usually eases my discomfort, but it only adds to my already upset stomach. For the first time, it doesn’t feel like an easy choice anymore, and I’m not sure what to make of that.
My first idea to get Zahra’s attention is through her love of food. It’s worked in the past, so I might as well put my theory to good use.
I find her right where I want her—in her cubicle without any Creators around us.
She stares at her computer before typing away in a blank document.
I drop the paper bag on her desk. “I come bearing an apology dinner.”
She slides the bag to the corner of the desk without bothering to look away from her screen. “I’m not interested.”
She continues clicking away at her computer. I grind my teeth together, unsure how to get her attention if she won’t even look at me. Food should have had some effect on her, especially if she’s hungry. Yet, it seems to only work if she actually wants my company.
“How about some apology cupcakes I made myself? Ani gave me her recipe.” I grab the plastic container out of the bag and place it closer to her.
Okay, fine. Ani baked them under my supervision but whatever.
She looks over at me. Her eyes remain glued to my face. “Are you here for work-related reasons?”
I frown at the coldness of her tone. “No.”
“Then get out. I don’t want to talk to you.”
Shit. This version of Zahra is new. I think it’s worse than how she reacted after I made my stupid comments about her mentorship program.
“At least give me a chance to explain. I didn’t go about things the right way the first time, but I have a reason.”
“There’s no reason in the world that is good enough.” She stands, grabs the bag of food, and shoves it in my arms. She tucks the container of cupcakes on top of the Chinese food, watching to make sure she doesn’t ruin the icing. I don’t deserve that niceness, but she gives it to me anyway because she’s just that damn good.
I’m nothing but screwed up—both in my actions and in my way of thinking.
I hate the glare she sends my way. I’m more interested in making her smile, and I feel extra shitty that I’m the reason behind her anger.
If only you had confessed sooner…
“Zahra, I shouldn’t have lied about Scott. I used him as a way to—”
My voice is cut off by her packing up her backpack and shutting off her computer. “Where are you going?”
She doesn’t bother to look at me. “I’m going home. Maybe you should do the same.”