He purses his lips. “Right, and that’s why I need to check it out. It’s not going to get any cleaner just sitting there.”
My hands are trembling. I place the cup of coffee down on the kitchen table before I drop it. “I just don’t feel comfortable driving out there. After everything that happened, you know?”
He looks at me in surprise. “Really? It was eleven years ago.”
We did, in fact, just pass the eleven-year anniversary of that horrible night. “Yes, really.”
He lays down the spatula he has been using to flip the pancakes. “Well, I don’t know what I’m going to do then. I don’t have a driver’s license, so how am I supposed to get out there?”
“I…”
He frowns. “Could you at least give me a ride? You don’t have to stay or go inside. Just drop me off.”
I hesitate.
“Please, Brooke?”
I feel a stab of guilt. The poor guy doesn’t even have a driver’s license, much less a vehicle. All he wants to do is go back to his childhood home so he can get it back in inhabitable conditions.
“Fine,” I say.
But even as the words are coming out of my mouth, I know I will live to regret them.
Chapter 49
Shane scores big points with his pancakes. Josh eats about eight of them, and with a full mouth, declares them to be “the best pancakes ever.” Shane could not possibly look happier when he says that.
“Can I grab some cleaning supplies to take out to the farmhouse?” he asks as he’s clearing away the food from the table.
“Sure…” I don’t want to tell him that I had been hoping he might change his mind.
“Thanks so much for doing this, Brooke.”
He rests a hand on my shoulder and gives it a squeeze. I squirm, since Josh is still at the table. Yes, we slept together last night, but doesn’t he understand that we have to be careful what information gets fed to our ten-year-old son?
Sure enough, Josh’s eyes widen slightly at the sight of Shane’s hand lingering on my shoulder. But he doesn’t say anything.
“So,” Shane says. “When can we get going?”
“Going where?” Josh pipes up.
Shane slides back into one of the seats at the kitchen table. “Your mom and I are going to this really cool farmhouse at the other end of town. I used to live there a long time ago.”
“Oh,” Josh says. “Cool.”
“Do you want to come?” Shane asks.
I suck in a breath. I had been thinking Josh would stay behind while I drove Shane out to the farmhouse. But to my surprise, Josh bobs his head enthusiastically. “Yeah!”
“Oh, honey,” I say quickly. “You don’t have to come with us. It’s going to be really boring. We’re not even going to go inside.”
“But I want to go,” Josh pouts.
I guess this is going to be a family trip.
Shane heads outside to shovel the driveway, and I gather cleaning supplies from the house. I don’t know entirely what to bring, and I’m worried that the entire house will be filthy beyond words. There isn’t carpeting, so I don’t bother with the vacuum. I bring the mop and bucket, lots of cleaning fluid, some rags, and two rolls of paper towels. Shane is going to have his work cut out for him.
After I’ve got all the supplies, I go to grab my car keys to throw everything into the trunk. I keep my keys on the bookcase right next to the entrance to the house, on the fourth shelf from the top, right in front of Webster’s dictionary. Except when I go to reach for them, they’re not there.