This place is so beautiful.
I never gave Neverland much thought while my mom ranted about it. I never wanted to believe in it.
But she was right—there is magic here. There’s magic in the beauty of it. And real magic too.
Down below, a fire is burning in the stone fire pit and there are easily two dozen people down there, most of them my age. Or at least, they appear to be my age.
There’s a spirited card game going on at a round table and on the other side of the bonfire, a boy is playing the ukulele beside another boy with a guitar.
“Where did all of these people come from?” I ask.
Cherry pulls me over to the railing so we can look down on the party while we talk. Flickering lanterns hang from wrought iron hooks dotted around the clearing.
“This house is massive,” Cherry explains. “You’re staying in what’s known as the loft. Vane, Kas, and Bash live up there. The rest of the Lost Boys live on the main floor. There are a lot. I honestly can’t even tell you how many.”
“But where do they come from?”
She shrugs. “From town. From your world. From Hook’s side. Lots of places. Lost Boys are just misfits, the ones who don’t belong or who never wanted to grow up.”
“Do they have magic too?”
“Not usually, no. Pan doesn’t let the fae in. Bash and Kas are an exception.”
I look over my shoulder and through the glass door to the kitchen. Kas is explaining something with his arms held wide and Bash is laughing at him.
There’s more to their story, I’m realizing. And I desperately want to know it.
“I keep hearing about this town. Where is it?”
“That way.” Cherry points back toward the kitchen and I’m assuming far beyond it. “But Pan probably won’t let you go there.”
“How big is this island?”
The guitar player picks a more upbeat tune and the ukulele adjusts to the beat.
“Pretty big. It would take you a half day to get to the other end by foot.”
So maybe like ten miles across if I had to guess.
That at least gives me something to wrap my head around.
“Come on.” Cherry starts for the stairs, but I linger at the balcony railing.
Several vines have taken hold in the stone and bright purple roses bloom from them, perfuming the air with a heady, sweet scent.
Two days ago I was terrified of going mad just like my mother and now I’m on an island in some other realm—allegedly—surrounded by the fae and vicious boys drinking faerie wine.
How quickly and suddenly things can change.
But I still don’t want to go mad and I think that whatever Pan means to do to get inside my head is exactly how it happens.
It makes me wonder what my mom went through when she came here. Pan made it clear that he and the Lost Boys never touch the Darlings, but clearly, they did something to them. Otherwise there wouldn’t be a legacy of insanity in my family tree.
Can I help him find his shadow without subjecting myself to the brain melt?
I take another sip of the wine and it immediately goes to my head and loosens the knots between my shoulders.
Alcohol makes everything better.
I drain my glass and return to the boys and hold out my cup.
Kas eyes me, considering.
“Please?” I say and give him an innocent stare.
Bash laughs and shakes his head.
“Fine.” Kas uncorks the bottle and gives me a generous pour. That same flame returns at the thought of anyone caring what I do or don’t do and it makes me want to test the strength of it, see how taut I can make it.
“Thank you.” I smile at Kas and whirl around and go on the hunt for Cherry. I’m beginning to like this place. Maybe more than I should.
Cherry and I are playing cards with some of the Lost Boys. I don’t know their names and they never asked mine. The boy beside me is short with red hair and he smells like cigarettes and mischief.
His hand is beneath the table, resting on my thigh. Everyone is handsy here, I’m realizing, and I’m pretty sure there was a couple fucking on the other side of the patio just a little bit ago.
This is a place of wild debauchery, a carnival ride that you never want to exit.
I’ve always loved carnivals.
The rides and the mischief.
The boy’s hand slips further up my thigh and my skirt rides up and I giggle with excitement.
I don’t know how much wine I’ve drunk. It doesn’t seem like enough, but maybe it’s been too much.
“Gable!” Cherry yells and slaps her cards on the table. The others groan.