I thought tonight we’d be inviting Tilly back to dig inside the Darling’s head.
I’m glad that we’re not. I’m glad the Darling is all right.
Dew has collected on the moss that grows between crevices. It’s a cold night and Darling shivers.
Diving into the ocean won’t help that, and neither will crossing worlds.
We toe the edge of the cliff as the ocean wind cuts in. Darling’s hair billows around her.
“This is much higher than it looks from down below.” Her arms are tight over her midsection and she hasn’t gotten closer than ten feet from the edge. “I don’t think I can do this. Is this how you brought me here?”
“Yes.”
She chews at her bottom lip.
“Just think, when we get there, you can stay. You never have to come back here.”
Her face falls and my gut clenches.
Is that what I want?
Is that what she wants?
I barely know her and yet she feels familiar.
And the thought of forgetting her once she’s gone…
My chest burns.
“Come.” I offer her my hand. At the very least, I can promise to be by her side. She slips her hand into mine. Her fingers are ice cold.
“So we just jump?”
“Yes.” I urge her closer to the edge.
“Are there rocks down there?”
“Yes, but that’s why we’ll take a big leap.”
“And then what?” She frowns up at me, worry lines furrowing between her brows. “Do we swim? Do we dive?”
“The magic will take care of it for us.”
She snorts.
“You just have to believe,” Kas says and then he jumps.
“Oh my god,” she says on a hiccupping breath. “I can’t.”
“You must.”
“Why?”
Bash jumps next. The wind switches directions and a lock of hair shoots across Darling’s face. I bend down to tuck it behind her ear. “I’ve got you. All right?”
I swear I can hear her heart pounding over the pounding of the waves.
“All right. Fine.”
“Good girl.”
I take us toward the edge. Her grip is tight on mine the closer we get.
“Ready?”
“I guess.”
“One.”
She trembles beside me.
“Two.”
Her chest rises and falls with quick breaths.
I don’t get to three before we’re leaping off the edge together.
This is the only way I can fly these days and it’s fucking exhilarating.
But if the Darling is right, by this time tomorrow, I will be flying amongst the stars.
30
WINNIE
When I come up for air, I’m screaming.
There are no waves. No wind. But we’re in water. This water is shallow and brackish and it takes me a second to recognize it as Emerald Pond in the park down the street from our old Victorian.
I’m home.
I’m home.
So why am I dreading it?
We trudge out of the water, me and Peter Pan and the Lost Boys.
It’s dark here too and crickets and pond frogs chirp and croak in the night.
“This way,” I say and move us to the sidewalk that’ll take us to the street.
We’re all silent as we walk, soaking wet and on a mission. It takes us less than ten minutes to reach the Victorian. Somehow seeing my house with Pan and the boys makes one or both of them feel unreal.
Like they shouldn’t exist in the same space.
We go up the cracked and crumbling front walk. I try the door and find it unlocked. That’s unlike my mother. She always remembers to lock the doors.
When I push the door in, it creaks on its hinges. The house is dark and quiet save for its normal settling, like old bones creaking.
“Mom?” I call out.
There’s no answer.
We go down the hallway and the boys stay behind me.
My great grandmother’s trunk is in the living room beneath the bay window.
Except when we reach the doorway, we find Mom there with a man shorter than me, and several more just like him. He’s got a shock of dark hair on his head and big, wide-set eyes with pointed ears.
“Brownie,” Pan says on a growl.
“Pan,” the little man says.
“Why are you here?” Pan asks. There is a very clear edge of suspicion in his voice.
The Brownie steps forward. “Tink didn’t want you to be king and I dedicated my life to her.”
“But how did you know it was here?” Pan takes another step.
Vane and the twins match his movements, flanking Pan.