“Well, it doesn’t sound like you have much choice then. If you’re not living life the way you want, you’re dying anyway.”
“I’m fucking scared, Max.”
“Of course you’re scared. But you gotta talk about it if you’re going to get past that. If you don’t deal with it, you’re just giving your fears more power. You can’t let shit fester.”
My brother frowned. “I don’t want to fucking die.”
“You’re not going to die. Have you gotten a second opinion yet?”
He shook his head.
“Alright. That’s where we start. Does Mom know?”
“No. And you’re not telling her either. She’s barely over losing Dad.”
“So, what? You just plan on having the surgery and not telling anyone? In that case, you’ll definitely die, even if the surgery is a success. Because Tate will kill you.”
Austin smiled sadly. “Not yet, okay? I don’t want anyone else to know—at least until I figure out what I’m doing.”
“But you’ll get a second opinion and let me go with you?”
Austin nodded. “Fine. But promise me you aren’t going to say anything.”
“I’ll do you one better. I won’t say anything, and I promise I’m not going to let you die.”
CHAPTER 23
* * *
Georgia
“I’m in love with Max.”
Maggie’s eyes flashed to me and back to the road. “Well that’s nice to know. But where the hell did that come from? We’ve been together since I picked you up to go to the warehouse at six o’clock this morning. I’ve tried to prod you into talking about things a half dozen times. And you pick now to spring that on me? At nine o’clock at night, after a fifteen-hour day, when we’re five minutes away from your apartment?”
I smiled. “Sorry. It’s been a long few days, and I haven’t slept well. I’m really tired, and normally the only thing I want to do when I’m exhausted is crawl into my own bed and knock out. Gabriel and I have argued over it more than once. Like when we’ve rolled out new products, and I spent every night working really late? He would tell me to come stay at his place, but I wouldn’t because I just wanted to be in my own bed. I’m exhausted right now, but I would rather go over to Max’s apartment and snuggle and sleep with him and his two dogs that snore than have my entire bed to myself. And it made me realize that a shitty night of sleep with Max is better than a good night of sleep alone, and that’s because I’m in love with him.”
“I’m happy for you. I don’t know Max well, but I like him a lot, and I’ve had a good feeling about the two of you from the beginning. You may not understand hockey, and he might not know much about running a company like you do, but you have a lot of the important stuff in common, like self-awareness and ambition. Gabriel always thought he was ambitious, but there’s a big difference between wanting things from life and being willing to put yourself out there to make it happen, you know?”
I nodded. “Max would never get upset because I wanted to work sixty hours a week. He’d try his best to distract me, but he’d also be excited to hear what I was working on.”
We pulled up in front of my building, and Maggie double-parked. “So where does this leave things with Gabriel?”
I sighed. “I have feelings for him. I can’t deny that. We have a long history together, and there was a time I was sure he was right for me. But now I know I’d rather take a chance on Max than be with Gabriel, even if he is willing to commit to me and is coming home in six months, and Max is moving three-thousand miles away.”
“Welp, you know the old saying. If you love something, set it free. If it comes back, it’s yours. If not, go fuck yourself because you were an idiot for letting it go in the first place.”
I laughed. “I feel like that should be a new message option on one of our cards.”
“Damn straight. I’m poetic.” She smiled. “So what’s your plan? I know you have one. Because God forbid you make a decision and not have a twelve-page, outlined work plan for how to execute it ready in your head.”
“I need to talk to Gabriel first—tell him we aren’t on the same page, that I don’t want an open or closed relationship with him anymore.”
“And Max?”
“I’m praying he and I are on the same page. There would obviously be a lot of logistics to figure out. But maybe he can stay with me in the offseason, and we can take turns visiting during.”