I let out a long sigh. She was beautiful, and when she smiled like that, it was so obvious that owning her own bookstore was her dream.
And now I was running it into the ground.
I snapped the laptop closed and shoved the image from my mind.
Half an hour later, the timer on the oven dinged and I pulled the pan of roast veggies and chickpeas out.
揝omething smells good.?My dad walked into the kitchen. It was what we had most nights before we both picked up our books and read at the dinner table.
揌ey, Dad??I set the pan on the stove and pulled a couple plates down.
揗mm??He opened the cutlery drawer and pulled out forks and knives.
揑 was thinking.?I kept my gaze on the food as I transferred it between two plates. 揟here are some great bookstore social media accounts. They take nice photos, they make book recommendations, and they抮e a free way to advertise.?He was quiet and I spared him a glance. 揂ll the bookstores have them,?I continued, setting the plates down on the table.
He sighed and took a seat across from me. He gave me a sad, tentative smile. 揌oney.?
With that word, I knew. My stomach sunk. 揑 think it would help boost sales.?
His expression strained. 揥e抳e had this conversation before. Pemberley抯 charm is that we don抰 do things like everyone else.?He waved his fork. 揟hese big box stores with their fluorescent lights and escalators? You know what they sell??
I tried not to roll my eyes. 揝carves.?
揝carves.?His eyes widened. 揅andles. And you know what else I抳e heard they sell??
I waited.
My dad glanced around the kitchen as if there were people in here who would overhear him. 揚ersonal items.?
I frowned. 揥hat kind of personal items??
His face was going red. He cleared his throat. 揗iri Yang told me she saw a vibrator.?He barely whispered the word.
I pressed my lips together so I wouldn抰 laugh. 揥hy was Miri Yang telling you about vibrators??
He shook his head. 揥e don抰 want to be like those big box stores, Hannah. Pemberley has a family-business charm. That抯 how your mother wanted it.?
Well, there it was. Couldn抰 argue with that, could I? Anytime I wanted to improve the store, this was his final playing card. That抯 how your mother wanted it. I could practically hear the door slamming shut. It wasn抰 my store, it was my dad抯 and my mom抯， and I just worked there. It wasn抰 my place.
I opened my mouth to say something to my dad about how we should try something new, but my throat knotted and my mouth snapped shut. I wasn抰 good at this part, the arguing part.
揧ou haven抰 been inside in a while.?
His gaze zeroed in on his plate and a crease formed on his forehead. He shook his head. 揑抳e been busy these days.?He took a bite of broccoli and waved his fork at me. 揑 know you have it covered.?
I bit back another retort. Busy? He hadn抰 been inside the store in a while because my mom抯 ghost lurked in every corner.
Unease moved through my stomach, and I stabbed a cube of roast yam. Every night, I came home and ate dinner with my dad at the table. After, we抎 read our books on the couches in the living room with our mugs of tea. He抎 drink Earl Grey and I抎 drink peppermint. At ten o抍lock, he抎 yawn, give me a kiss on the forehead, and go to bed, and at eleven o抍lock, I抎 get into my pajamas before getting ready for bed myself.
It was the same every night, and it would be the same every night for the rest of my life. For the last seven years since I came home from university, I抎 worn the same clothes, eaten the same food, woken up and gone to the bookstore most days. I had the same long, straight blonde hair, often tied up into a ponytail. When my glasses broke a couple years ago, I had bought the same ones again.
Nothing had changed, not in the store and not with me. My chest hollowed at the thought. Was this how the rest of my life would go?
No, it wouldn抰， I realized, because the bookstore wouldn抰 be around much longer if things continued the way they were going. Panic streaked through my mind again.
揑 forgot to tell you,?my dad said, standing and taking my empty plate to the dishwasher. 揧our uncle Rick needs a house sitter for the summer, so I抦 going to stay there for a bit. His neighbor fell through because they sold their house.?
My uncle lived on Salt Spring Island, a small island off the coast of Vancouver. Every summer, he sailed up and down the coast of British Columbia while his neighbor took care of his house. He had a couple goats and cats who needed daily feeding.
揧ou抮e going to be gone the whole summer??I blinked behind my glasses. 揟hat抯 a long time.?He抎 never been away this long. I抎 be home alone the entire summer.
A worried expression came over his face. 揂re you going to be okay here by yourself??