I forced a laugh. 揙f course. I抦 an adult.?
Later, in my room, I flopped face-down on my bed. I could sense the dress抯 presence, even tucked in the dark corner beneath the bed.
Two minutes later, I reached over my shoulder to zip it up before turning to gawk at myself in the mirror. Th閞鑣e had guessed the sizing correctly and it fit me in all the right places.
Wearing this dress felt like a joke, though. Like when people put sunglasses on a baby and everyone laughs.
Here I was, nearly thirty years old, and I had nothing to show for it. I still lived with my dad, I had accomplished nothing, and I抎 never been in love. I抎 never had a boyfriend. I抎 never been to Europe or Australia or New York, like the characters in the books I read.
One day, Hannah Banana, you抮e going to find your true love, she would always tell me, right in this very room, usually with a book in her hand. I remembered her soft smile as she tucked me in. You抮e going to find someone who makes you feel incredible, and you抣l wonder where he had been hiding this whole time.
I was the one who was hiding. The love of my life would never find me behind the stacks of books in my dusty old store.
A picture of Avery and me at her wedding sat on my dresser. We were smiling at each other, and she radiated happiness. Last year, Emmett had convinced Avery to be his fake fianc閑 while he ran for mayor. He had come into my bookstore and asked me to help him pick out a ring. The care and attention he had put into finding the perfect ring? It was never fake for Emmett. On their wedding day, she and Emmett couldn抰 take their eyes off each other. They still couldn抰。 I had watched her fall in love with him, watched as they became the most important thing to each other.
I wanted that, too.
A rock landed in my stomach.
My mom would be so disappointed in me. I crossed my arms over my chest, remembering how driven she was, how passionate and excited about the shop she was. She抎 see my sad little life and wince with disappointment, or worse, embarrassment.
I studied the dress and ran my fingers over the coarse sequins. I wanted to be worthy of this dress. I wanted to make the shop profitable again. I wanted to find someone to fall in love with.
I stared at my reflection for one more moment before opening a drawer and pulling out a piece of paper and a pen.
Before 30:
1. Save my failing bookstore.
Since my dad was stuck on keeping the store in the nineties, I would have to get creative.
2. Find my true love.
I cringed at how cheesy that sounded. No one would ever see this list.
I glanced at my reflection again. The sequins reflected pinpricks of light on my bedroom walls.
3. Become a hot girl.
The sparkly dress was a hot girl dress. If I wanted true love, I had to go out and get him. I couldn抰 sit in my bookstore with my boring sweaters and wait for him to show up.
This was so stupid.
A thought struck me, and I raised an eyebrow.
Wyatt knew hot girls. Wyatt didn抰 really date, but I had seen him with women a few times, and they were always drop dead gorgeous. Shiny hair, perfect makeup, stylish outfits out of a magazine. Hot girls.
The image of him in my bookstore earlier that day flashed into my head. Hot people attracted other hot people. That was a fact of life. And Wyatt? He had girls falling all over him.
The funny thing is, he didn抰 seem to care. He only cared about surfing.
Which made women want him even more. I frowned and narrowed my eyes. I was onto something here.
I chewed my lip before writing the last one.
4. Make Mom proud.
A rock formed in my throat, and I blinked tears out of my eyes. There. I said it. I knew she抎 look at my life now and wish I had done more.
Alright, enough moping. Once I was in my pajamas, I reached for my laptop on my desk and flipped it open before pulling up a Scandinavian music video.
After a few videos, the tension in my stomach unraveled and I settled into bed. I grinned, watching a video by one of my favorite Europop artists, Tula. She was a tiny woman with a lot of hair and enormous eyes. In this video, she dressed as a mermaid, perched on a rock with a scaly tail, twisted her fingers in her long green wig while she sang in Finnish. Behind her, muscular mermen stood in the ocean, dancing and thrusting to the music. Some held trident spears, some wore fishing nets as capes.
God, I loved Europop.
The video cut to a close up of one of the mermen, and I nearly fell off my bed.
My mouth hung open as Wyatt Rhodes thrust against the air behind Tula.
My eyes were saucers as I scanned over the same muscles I had seen this afternoon in the store. Except these muscles moved under silver body paint, with decorative scales glued on.