Misha wants me to be his . . . consort? Or is that what he wants them to think? My instincts tell me it’s more of the second than the first. Misha is kind and gorgeous, but more likely he wants access to this power or has some plan to use any perceived relationship with me to increase his own standing in Faerie politics.
Finn arches a brow. “And what does that have to do with me?”
“You’re protecting her. Everyone knows it.”
“It’s the least I can do.” He turns back to the view and leans his forearms on the railing. “After everything.”
“Has she visited your dreams again? Since . . .”
He shakes his head. “No. I don’t think she intended to that time. Her magic was surging through her transformation, and her mind latched onto me as a way to make sense of everything.” He drags a hand through his curls, making a mess of them. “Sebastian really loves her—deceit or not.”
“Yes, well . . . what did love ever do for us but mess with our plans?” Pretha asks, and Finn grunts in agreement. “I should go,” she says. “I need to say goodbye to the female I love and pretend that I’m okay sleeping alone while she’s under the same roof.”
Finn arches a brow. “You don’t have to sleep alone,” he says softly. “Amira has her own chambers. Everyone knows she’d happily make room for you in her bed.”
Pretha closes her eyes and swallows hard. “I decided long ago that I would rather be lonely and miserable than be her mistress. I can’t fault anyone who would’ve chosen differently, but for me . . . it wouldn’t be enough. It didn’t seem fair to enter into an arrangement that would leave me feeling angry and bitter toward her and my brother.”
Finn gives her wrist a final squeeze. “Sleep well.”
After Pretha leaves, I find my way back into the corridor and wait several minutes before stepping out of my shadows. I take a deep breath as I feel myself turning corporeal again, and then I join Finn on the terrace, my boots clicking against the stone floors with every step.
“I forget how beautiful the nights are in these lands,” he says before I have a chance to explain my presence or why I snuck through his wards—not that I have a good explanation.
I join him at the rail. “They are stunning. Better than home?”
A small, sad smile curls his lips. “No. Nothing’s better than home.”
“I bet you’re anxious to get back there.”
His eyes meet mine, and the wariness I see there is like a stone settling in my gut. “I’m anxious to be doing something that gets us closer to a solution. The palace itself . . .” He shakes his head. “Going home is always an emotional quagmire, one I’m never eager to rejoin.”
“Why’s that?”
Finn’s mouth twists unhappily. “It’s irrelevant. All that matters now are answers.”
“Answers about what?”
“About the children. About my people. About what we do now. We are a court in shambles.”
And that’s all my fault. I let the words sink into me, let them settle like stones in my gut. “You really think Mab will have a solution?”
He nods. “I think the Great Queen would go to untold lengths to protect her court, but especially to protect it from Seelie rule.”
“And you’d accept her solution if it involved letting someone else sit on the throne? Even after . .
. everything?”
He swallows. “Believe it or not, I want what’s best for my people more than what’s best for me.
Right now, what’s best is a kingdom that survives.” He shakes his head. “My life is less valuable than that of an entire court. If I didn’t know that, I should be ashamed to ever believe I could rule.”
“You must really despise me then,” I say softly.
Straightening, he turns to me slowly. “Not even a little, Princess.”
“You should. My life is no more valuable than yours, yet my beating heart is the reason your court is in shambles, as you say.”
“I don’t see it that way.” Lifting his face, he turns his attention back to the night sky, and the silence sits heavily between us. “Are you prepared to see him again?” he asks.
“I saw him once already.”
Finn arches a brow. “Let me guess—when you asked him to dismantle the camps?”
Nodding, I lean on the rail and watch a bat circle in the distance. “Does it ever get easier? Being connected to someone like this?”