I never thought what it might be like for him, someone who doesn’t have parents or siblings, being included in a family dinner with a close-knit family. I didn’t notice when my dad called him son, but I guess that’s not something I’d generally take note of. But I can genuinely sense his appreciation, the way he feels accepted within my family, and it reminds me to thank my parents later for treating him like one of our own.
“No need to thank me, I should be thanking you.”
“For what?” he asks, stepping closer and taking my hand in his. The subtle move makes my pitter-pattery heart skip a beat. Maybe Mom was right. Maybe there is something more between Eli and me. Maybe he does look at me a certain way and has just been hiding his feelings in the hope of keeping the peace between us.
And now that he takes another step closer, all I can think about is . . . should I attempt to see if she was right?
“I’m saying thank you for being so open and honest with my parents. I know they needed the reassurance that everything is going to be okay.”
“And do you believe everything will be okay?” he asks as his fingers gently brush a strand of hair behind my ear.
I wet my lips, and his eyes follow the movement as I slowly place my hand on his chest. I’m not sure what’s pulling us together, I’m not even sure if I’m dreaming this up, this connection we have, but I’m letting myself fall into it.
Between the absolutely sexy vulnerability he showed tonight and how his smile lit up the night, the whirlwind of emotions is messing with my heart and mind.
“With you by my side, yes, I do believe everything will be okay.”
“I’m not sure you know how much that means to me.”
“Well, it means a lot to me what you said tonight.”
He reaches up and touches my cheek. “I meant it all.” And then he says, “Should we watch some Ozark to end the night?”
“I’d like that.” And I’d like so much more. I slide my hand nervously up to his shoulder and then behind his head. His eyes remain fixed on mine as I quietly ask, “Can you, uh, unzip the back of my dress for me?”
I watch as his Adam’s apple bobs right before he nods. “Sure,” he answers in a gruff voice. And then his hand slides around me. He grabs my zipper and slowly pulls it down for me. His fingers drag along my skin as it’s exposed.
“Thank you,” I whisper.
When I should move away to go change, I don’t. I stay fixed on him. On his grateful eyes. On his strong jaw. On his enticing lips.
Just kiss him, Penny.
What could go wrong?
He’s holding you close. His hands are on your hips. This means something. This proximity.
Just dive in.
See if there’s more.
You won’t regret it. I know you won’t . . .
A blast of courage tears through me, and before I can stop myself, I wet my lips again and sift my fingers through his hair just as I stand on my toes and press my mouth to his.
I kiss him.
I kiss the mouth that I’ve missed for the past few months. The mouth that has sent me into a tailspin of unrequited desire. The same mouth that scoured my body and made me come harder and faster than any mouth ever has before.
I take what I’ve wanted.
Unapologetically.
And for a moment, his lips caress mine. He kisses back. Yes, he wants me. And his grip on me grows tighter . . . right before he pulls away, putting a good foot of distance between us.
Breathing heavy, hand digging into his hair, he shakes his head. “Fuck . . . I . . . I can’t, Penny.”
He can’t?
My heart plummets as I feebly ask, “You can’t what?”
He motions between us. “I can’t do this.”
The hope. The belief that there might be something more, the idea we could be a couple, all blows up in smoke. Poof. Gone. Right in my face.
I was proven wrong.
My mom and Blakely were wrong.
All this time, I thought he possibly thought more of me, but it was all in my head.
“I’m s-sorry,” I say, taking a step back. “I, uh, I just thought, well . . . never mind what I thought.” I take another step back.
“Penny—”
“No, it’s fine.” I smile at him, but I can feel just how fake it is. I take a step toward the hallway. “I got caught up in the moment. You know, hormones and all of that.” I nervously laugh and move backward again, but in my retreat, my heel snags in the entryway rug, and I tip backward, landing flat on my ass. Embarrassment washes over me as the top half of my dress falls off my shoulders.