Uh . . . what? Penny looks at me with panic and confusion as a wave of fury beats through me in seconds.
First, he’s going to be a dick to me.
Then he’s going to have his hands all over her stomach.
And question my ability to make my girl come . . .
And now this?
Oh no, he fucking doesn’t.
Not on my goddamn watch.
My hockey aggression rises to the surface as I stand from my chair and say, “We didn’t ask what you wanted. We’re telling you what we want to happen, and as people who are paying your goddamn bills, you will provide us with a service. Now tell us the sex of the baby, you big pec-ed motherfucker.”
The words flow right out of me, unfiltered, straight from the inner beast inside me as my fists clench at my sides.
This guy wants to try to tell us what to do. Well, he’s going to have to go through me first.
“Eli.” Penny tugs on me.
“No,” I say to her. “I’m not going to let this guy dick us around.” I pick up the sonogram wand, shove it at him, and say, “You fucking tell us if this baby has a vagina or a penis right fucking now, or I’m going to show you what it’s like to be defended by me on the ice.”
“Eli, please.”
Big Pecs holds his hands up and says, “Slow down there, big guy.” Throwing down the big guy, yeah, I’ll show him just who the big guy is. “It’s a joke I play on my patients. It’s just a joke. Of course I’m going to tell you the sex of your baby.”
You would think that would defuse me, but it doesn’t.
“It’s not a fucking funny joke. Usually, people laugh at jokes. Do you see anyone laughing? Not to mention, it’s incredibly unprofessional. You’ve been a total nightmare this entire visit, and it’s taking everything in me not to slam you against the wall for the way you’ve spoken to me, the way you’ve degraded me in front of Penny, and this—”
Penny tugs on my arm. “Eli. It’s okay.”
“It’s not okay, Penny. He’s been dicking us around.”
“Eli.” Her eyes meet mine. “He’s been joking this whole time.”
Wait . . . what?
Big Pecs holds his hands up still, looking more startled than anything. “Penny asked me to give you a hard time, said you were feeling inferior about your chest compared to mine. I thought it was funny, so I went along with it.”
She . . . uh . . . she what?
I glance down at her, and she winces. “Sorry.” She attempts to smile. “Got . . . you.”
I sit in my seat, nostrils flared, and turn toward her. “I hate you.”
She chuckles. “No, you don’t.”
“Right now. I do.”
She wraps her hand behind my neck and brings me to her, where she presses a gentle kiss to my lips. “You don’t hate me,” she whispers.
I groan and kiss her one more time before saying, “No . . . I don’t.”
When we part, Big Pecs holds his hand out to me, and reluctantly, I give it a shake. “Sorry, but it was all her idea. For the record, huge fan, man. Sorry about the loss. I was really hoping you guys could bring The Cup home this year.”
Still salty toward the man, I say, “Yeah, well, next year maybe.”
He nods and then clasps his hands together. “And I guess congratulations are in order. You’re having a boy.” He turns on the monitor and circles a portion of the baby. “Right here, clear as day, he’s spread-eagled showing off his manhood.”
And just like that, the anger and irritation drain away. An odd sense of pride surges through me as I look closely while Penny says, “Just like his father.”
I chuckle as she loops her arm around mine.
Big Pecs prints out a few pictures and then lets us clean Penny up in private. She reaches for the wet towel, but I stop her and take the cloth in hand. “You, ma’am, are in so much fucking trouble.”
She lets out a long thread of chuckles. “I’m sorry, but things have been so weird and up and down. I haven’t pranked you in a bit. I really wanted to lighten things up between us.”
“Lighten things up? Penny, I almost checked your doctor into the wall.”
She covers her mouth and chuckles some more. “I think I saw steam come out of your ears, but I’ll say this, it was really hot seeing you stand up for me like that.” Her hand falls to my cheek, only for her thumb to pass over my bottom lip. “Really freaking sexy, Eli.”
I wiggle my eyebrows at her. “Turned on, are ya?”