‘Can you feel their presence, Livi?’ whispers Cibi. ‘Because I can. I can see Mumma in her best dress and Grandfather in his suit. He’s holding a bunch of gladioli, and .?.?.’ Her voice breaks.
‘And Mumma is smiling, Livi,’ says Magda, squeezing Cibi’s shoulder. ‘It’s that smile she used to give us before saying goodnight.’
‘Usually it’s only their absence I feel,’ says Livi, her eyes shining. ‘But tonight, that space is filled with my happiness. I think that’s what you mean, Cibi, by their presence?’
Cibi nods, then looks at her youngest sister. ‘I was four years old when you were born, Livi, and I remember it clearly.’
‘I remember it too,’ says Magda. ‘Even though I was only two.’
‘You don’t!’ says Cibi. ‘How could you possibly?’
‘Well, I do. Father took us both in to see the new baby.’ Magda looks at Livi. ‘You were so tiny, like a newborn kitten.’
‘Don’t start all that again, it’s my wedding day,’ says Livi, laughing.
‘Well, Father let me hold you,’ continues Cibi. ‘I had to sit down in his big chair and he carefully laid you in my arms.’ All around them the wedding is winding down: guests are leaving and dirty plates are being stacked. ‘He told me that having a new sister is a bit like keeping a special secret.’
‘I don’t remember that,’ says Magda.
‘See?’ says Cibi. ‘You were too young. Anyway, with special secrets, you have to keep them forever, that’s what he told me. They have to live inside you.’ Cibi touches her heart. ‘There is nothing that anyone can do to make you give up your secret. And that’s how Magda and I were to keep you safe.’
‘You have kept me safe,’ Livi says, taking her sisters’ hands. ‘But you mustn’t give up now, OK?’
‘Maybe just a little,’ jokes Magda. ‘I mean, Ziggy might have something to say about it.’
‘Don’t even joke,’ chides Cibi, serious. ‘Husbands don’t stand a chance with us around.’
*
As she drifts off to sleep that night, Cibi recalls the day of Livi’s birth in even greater detail. Livi’s blanket was soft and yellow. Their mother, exhausted, offered her only a weak smile when she was allowed in to see her. Cibi worried she was dying, until Father reminded her that Mumma had delivered a whole baby, and she was allowed to be tired. She had sat on her mother’s bed, holding her hand, and Mumma had told her to give thanks to God in her prayers that night for the ‘kitten’。 And Cibi had.
Just as she’s falling asleep, she recalls one more detail: while she was praying, her father had come into the bedroom she shared with Magda, and told her it was time to go to sleep, that God would be around tomorrow too, to hear her thanks. God would be around tomorrow too.
Cibi’s eyes flick open. She reaches for Mischka’s hand. God is here today.
*
The next morning, Livi and Ziggy are woken by the calling of the rooster, loudly proclaiming the dawning of a new day.
‘I can’t believe we live in a goat shed,’ Livi announces, looking around the windowless room.
‘I promised you it wouldn’t be for ever. You deserve a palace, fit for a queen, and that’s what I’m working towards,’ Ziggy tells her, pulling her close. He kisses each of her cheeks and then her mouth.
‘I would just like some windows,’ manages Livi, before she kisses him back.
Once dressed, they open their front door to find two large crates of oranges sitting on the ground. A third crate is covered by a white linen cloth, which Livi removes to reveal a platter of food and a small note: Your wedding breakfast! Blessings on your marriage, from Saadiya, Leah and family, it reads.
The couple take their breakfast to a couple of tree stumps in the clearing around their hut and eat in joyful silence, savouring every mouthful of the warm bread, cheese, hot coffee and slices of orange.
‘So this is married life,’ says Livi, wiping her mouth. ‘I think I like it.’
‘I like it too. And in the spirit of sharing our stories,’ says Ziggy, pouring more coffee, ‘there’s something I need to know.’
‘Ask me anything,’ says Livi. Ziggy sets down his cup and takes her hands in his and, for a moment, Livi feels unnerved by his sudden focus as he meets her eyes. ‘What is it?’
‘Livi, I am on your side now. I find this stuff hard to talk about, and you don’t, so please be honest with me. Last night you cried yourself to sleep. I don’t want to think it’s because .?.?. well .?.?. because of anything I did .?.?. we did. I just .?.?.’ Ziggy is blushing.