Followed by a jolt of irritation, because I would love to dance to it and I can’t, at least not with the man I want.
And now I’m angry. At myself. Angry for not letting myself live my own life. All this time I was trying to spare Case’s feelings, and now I realize what a crock of shit that was.
I’m not a petty person—I honestly don’t think too hard about what I do next. I’m just tired. Tired of watching Ryder from across the room all night and not being able to talk to him.
Tired of having to send sly texts about how much we want to bang each other.
Tired of not being able to hold his hand.
Tired of not being able to throw my arms around him, like the night he protected me from the creepy elevator guy. I should have hugged him then, but I didn’t. All because I was trying to be respectful of my ex-boyfriend’s feelings.
My gaze drifts toward Ryder’s group. They’re howling over something Shane just said. Well, Beckett, Case, and David are howling. Ryder, of course, is chuckling quietly because he’s not a howler. No, he’s too cool for that.
So, no, I truly don’t mean to be petty, but this song is beautiful and the sight of him takes my breath away, and soon my legs, of their own volition, carry me toward the group.
“Hey,” I interrupt, touching Ryder’s arm. “Come dance with me.”
CHAPTER FORTY-ONE
RYDER
One hundred percent
WELL.
I sure wasn’t expecting that.
Gigi has spent months hiding me from the world and now she’s asking me to dance in front of all our teammates?
I’m stunned speechless for a moment.
Then I shrug and say, “Sure?”
I keep my expression shuttered and my response vague, because I don’t know how I’m supposed to react. If I’m supposed to treat it like a friend asking another friend to dance. Or a peer asking a peer.
Or my girlfriend asking her boyfriend.
Case’s eyes narrow as Gigi takes my hand.
She tugs on it, and I follow her instinctively. I’m so crazy gone for this woman that not following her isn’t even an option.
When we reach the dance floor, I dip my head close to her ear. “I don’t dance, baby.”
“You’ll be fine.” She places one hand on my shoulder and clasps the other in mine.
She peers up at me with the most beautiful smile, and I’m dumbstruck again because she’s so gorgeous I don’t even know how to function in the face of that smile.
“Put your hand on my waist,” she says, so I do.
She moves closer, the top of her head tucked beneath my chin. The flowery scent of her shampoo drifts into my nose. I breathe her in and get high.
“What is this?” I ask, trying to concentrate on pressing matters rather than how good she smells and feels in my arms.
“Just dancing with my boyfriend,” she answers.
I don’t even want to look in the direction of our friends. I can feel their stares on us. I imagine that particularly prickly sensation tightening my skin is courtesy of Colson.
“Is this some sort of power play?”
“No.”
We move to the slow tempo set by the orchestra. I recognize the song as a classic rock ballad.
Gigi tips her head back to look at me. “This was my parents’ wedding song.”
That startles me. “Really?”
“Yeah. It’s the first song they ever danced to.” She moistens her lips, blushing before averting her eyes. “I heard it just now and…I don’t know. I knew I wanted to dance to it with you.”
That does something to my heart. I don’t know what. I don’t understand half of the emotions she elicits in me. Whatever this one is, it just feels right.
We continue to sway, doing a little turn, during which I catch a glimpse of Colson’s blond hair and suspicious eyes.
“Case is going to have questions,” I warn.
“I don’t care. I came to the realization tonight that I can’t live my life worrying about his feelings.”
She’s right.
But she’s also very wrong, because he’s my cocaptain and I am worried about his feelings. We’ve only recently become friends. And I’m already grieving the loss of that friendship as Gigi and I turn again and my gaze locks with his. I can feel the surrender that pervades my face. The defeat. Because I can’t hide how I feel about this woman anymore. And he knows it.
His blue eyes darken. Suddenly, he’s breaking off from the group. Stalking toward the dance floor. I expect him to confront us, but all he does when he gets within earshot is hiss, “Fuck this,” and then brush past us and march out of the ballroom.
The song changes to something more up-tempo, as if the violins and cellos also feel the urgency of the situation.
“Shit. I gotta go talk to him,” I tell Gigi.
She bites her lip. “I know.”
“He’s my teammate.”
“I said I know.” She drops her hand from my shoulder and pulls me away from the floor. “Let’s go.”
We catch up to him at the valet stand, where Case spins at our approach and glares.
“Case—” Gigi starts.
“Fuck you both,” he interrupts. His face is red with fury.
“Hey,” she says sharply. “Come on.”
“How long has this been going on?” He angrily gestures between us before his gaze fixes on me. Accusation burns there. “How long were you pretending to be my buddy while you were going after my ex?”
“That’s not how it happened,” I say quietly.
“When did it start?” he demands.
I glance at Gigi. I don’t know how she plans to play this. If she’s going to lie or not. I’ll back her up either way.
But she’s honest. “September,” she tells him. “After my exhibition.”
Case recoils. “That long?”
She nods.
And I’m momentarily floored myself because I can’t believe it’s been three months. It simultaneously feels like I just met her yesterday and like I’ve known her forever.
Case looks like he wants to hit me. I know it because he plasters his arms to his body, fists clenched to his sides. He’s doing everything he can to control the violence simmering beneath the surface.
“You fucking asshole,” he spits out. “You warned me you were a dick. I should’ve believed you.”
I swallow a sigh. “I barely knew you three months ago, man. We weren’t friends.”
“Yeah, until we were.”
“It’s my fault,” Gigi intervenes. “I told Ryder not to say anything, okay?”
His incredulous gaze shifts to her. “I can’t believe this. He’s my teammate, Gigi.”
Regret floats through her gray eyes. “I didn’t plan this. It just happened.”
“You could’ve stopped it once it did. Taken a step back.”
“Why would I take a step back? You and I aren’t together anymore.” She sounds frustrated. “I made that more than clear every time we talked. I didn’t lead you on.”
“I know that, but did you even consider showing me a modicum of respect by not banging my teammate?”
“Respect? Are you kidding me right now?”