“Oh, don’t fool yourself, darling,” he said. “Everyone has a price.”
“Listen, Uncle-ji,” I pointed to the time on the dashboard. “I don’t want to miss my flight, okay?”
He turned on the ignition and carried on driving toward the airport. We didn’t exchange another word.
TWELVE
When I told Arjun that I wasn’t scared of him, it was mostly bravado. The truth is, I knew that man could harm me in ways deep and long lasting, whereas I could hardly ruffle a hair on his head. But there was one thing I could do. I could, finally, reach out to Naima. I texted her the day after my return.
I’m back. How’s chotu Billee?
Oh yay. B’s a fluffball as always.
I’ll drop him off tonight?
Yes please.
“You okay?” she asked when she saw me a few hours later.
She set Billee’s carrier down and unlatched it. He emerged, sniffing cautiously before we commenced our rituals of reunion.
“Hai chotu Billee. Welcome home,” I cooed and petted him. He let out a little meep in return and instructed to touch noses.
“You look tired,” Naima said. “Jet lag?”
“A little. What’s this?” I asked, pointing to Billee’s expanded tummy. “You didn’t play with him?”
“He doesn’t like to play. Only wants twenty-four-seven belly rubs.”
“You have to make him. Look.”
I found a ribbon toy and waved it around in the air. Billee raised his head and looked at it with rounded pupils for a second before flopping over on his back.
“Told you. So, what did you get up to? Did you see Humayun’s Tomb or whatever?”
“I saw so many things, and I need to tell you about all of it, but first, oh my god, the invite. It’s beautiful.”
While I was away, Naima and Azeem had set a date. The wedding was in six months, and she’d sent me the invite that morning. I lingered on the topic because I wanted to make up for hurting Naima. Also, I didn’t want to jump straight into my news without properly honoring this development in her life first. Whether I approved or not, I’d decided, was irrelevant. In fact, I figured that if things did go badly （which they would）， she’d be more likely to come to me afterward if I supported her now.
“I’m excited,” I continued. “We should start dance practice soon, there’s barely any time.”
She scrutinized me. “Are you sure you’re happy about this?”
“Naima,” I embraced her, “so happy.”
She softened with relief. “Oh, thank god, ’cause you’re right. There’s so much to do. So much to fill you in on. I got worried, you know, while you were away, that I’d been replaced in the best friend department. Tell me if I have, okay? I can take it.”
“Well, firstly, never. But also, truth is, I’m not sure Shiba and I are friends anymore.”
“Oh no, why?”
“It’s a long story. Actually, Naima, about that. There’s something I need to show you.”
I flipped open my laptop, plugged in the yellow USB, and showed her the audio file.
“It’s a couple of hours long—”
“Please don’t tell me you two recorded an album.”
I laughed. “No. Nothing like that. It’s just, I’ve been uncovering this whole … situation. It’s bizarre. Surreal. And I need your help. I wanted to tell you earlier, but I didn’t have the words.”
“What is it?”
“It’s all in here. The whole story, start to finish. Would you listen to it?”
“All of it?”
“Please.”
“Can’t you just tell me?”
“I wouldn’t know how. And some of it is just … it’s just not stuff I want to repeat. Just take it home with you. I’ll make you a copy.”
“I want to listen to it now.”
“Yeah?”
“At least the beginning. Just make us some tea, and I’ll sit here and listen.”
And so, after swearing her to secrecy, I handed her my headphones.
“Can I listen without?”
“If you want to.”
“I’d prefer it that way.”
I went to put the kettle on and Naima pressed play. When I returned with the mugs of tea, I heard myself repeating Naima’s own words.
“You are searching for the reasons for your discontent outside yourself, when the discontent itself is the reason for the discontent.”
Naima hit pause.
“I didn’t say that.”
“I mean, maybe not that exactly, but definitely something like that.”
“It sounds like you’re taking the piss out of my livelihood! Why are you so cynical?”
“I wasn’t taking the piss.”
“Do you mention how I told you Mercury was in retrograde the day you met Adam?”
“I don’t think so. I can put it in if you want.”
“Obviously put it in.”
“Okay, I will. I really wasn’t taking the piss, by the way.”
“Well, even though you’re not portraying me in the best light, I’m still flattered that you started with me.”
“Who else would I start with?”
“Correct answer. Now go do some work or something, it’s weird to have you hovering over me while I listen.”
I went to my room, leaving the door ajar so I could listen to Naima listening to me. I heard myself recounting my relationship with Adam, our trip to Pakistan, his confession about the Centre, and then my visit to her flat before my interview. She hit pause again at this point and popped her head into my room.
“Is that really what we asked for in our manifestations?”
“I think so.”
“Hmm, it’s good to remember. I should write them down, stick them up on my wall. Oh, but I have to make sure to amend them over time. It’s not good to have your manifestations set in stone—”
“I don’t mean this in a bad way, Naima, but you seem to be most interested in the bits involving you. Are you even listening to the rest?”
“Of course I am. It’s about the Centre, isn’t it? I can tell.”
“Yeah.”
“Okay, so quiet then. But hey, listen, are you hungry? Shall I make us sandwiches?”
“I can heat up some daal chawal?” I offered. “Does that work?”
“Perfect.”
“Great.”
“By the way,” she added, “what’s up with that ‘I wish I’d had an arranged marriage’ stuff? Do you really believe that?”
“I dunno. Just popped into my head. You see my logic, though, right?”
“Not at all. You know those matches were based on things like caste, class, skin color, right? It’s all about keeping the money in the family. You can’t be romanticizing that shit—”
“Naima, okay. Maybe. But it’s better than romanticizing the romance shit. That’s what you do.”
“What does that even mean?” She laughed and threw a cushion at me.
“I don’t know. But this isn’t the time. Just … keep listening.”
And so she kept listening while I heated up our food. I handed her a bowlful, and she responded with a thumbs-up.