“I did, but now I’m all finished.”
“Go Rye-Rye’s house now?” He dipped his head twice in those deep, emphatic nods, his grin splitting wide and showing off two straight rows of his tiny teeth.
A thread of worry tugged at my spirit. I had to be careful with this. It wasn’t only my heart that was on the line. Kayden adored Ryder, and I couldn’t stand the idea of stealing that bond from him over a stupid choice on my part.
But how could it be stupid?
How when Ryder had grinned at me in that sly way the whole time he and Ezra had been sharing their lunch? Not when he’d stolen a secret touch, brushing his fingertips along the outside of my thigh under my dress when I’d placed his food in front of him.
Trembles rocked at the memory.
God, it sure felt like something.
“That’s right. We’re going to go to Uncle Ryder’s house.” It came out a little breathier than it should.
My mother caught it, care woven into every line on her face. “How is it going over there?”
“Good.”
Worry followed it. “Has Ezra heard anything more about this breakin?”
“No. I really think it was someone who was looking for something easy to steal, and they took off once they realized it was actually an occupied house they were breaking into. I don’t think we need to worry about it.”
Except not worrying about it meant that it was safe for us to go back.
Rejection billowed through.
I wasn’t ready for that yet.
The problem was, it didn’t have anything to do with being cautious about returning to my house.
It had everything to do with the man who would be waiting for us at his place.
Mom’s head angled a fraction to the side. Barely enough to notice, but enough to know she’d picked up on something. “And how was your date last night?”
“Good.”
A throaty chuckle rolled from her. “My, my, aren’t you just full of the adjectives this afternoon? Don’t you think you could do a little better than that? You did promise to tell me all about it this morning, and then you dropped Kayden off so fast I barely caught sight of your face.”
I let go of a slight giggle. “Sorry, it was just a long day. The date was…fine.”
Her brows lifted, and that time I laughed. “Brad’s a nice guy, but I don’t think there are going to be any wedding bells in our future.”
“No sparks, huh?”
“Not even one.”
But I sure had felt one later. I had to bite back the flush that threatened to steal across my skin.
“Well, that’s too bad, but I’m glad that you at least got out and tried. It’s been a long time since you went on a date.”
She looked at Kayden then.
I hated how all of them speculated. How I’d kept it like a dirty secret.
It wasn’t like I thought of sex as that. It was just where my mental state had been at that time. How it’d left me feeling gross after.
The depths of the heartache that I’d been lost in, how desperate I’d been to erase it and fill it.
“I guess now that the café is on its feet and Kayden is getting a little older, it’s time for me to have a little fun.” I managed to keep it light.
She hooked her shoulder on the wall and crossed her arms over her chest. “I’m thinking it’s time for a lot of fun.”
“Mom.” I laughed, shaking my head as I set Kayden on his feet, then I sent her a wry arch of my brow. “As if you’re one to talk. I don’t think I’ve ever known you to go on a date in my entire life.”
“You never know, this old girl might get a wild hair and decide to start looking for a man herself.”
“I hope you do. You deserve to be happy.”
Her smile was soft. “I am happy, Dakota. You and your brother and sister make me happy. Our little man right here who loves to keep his gammy company makes me happy.”
Her gaze was tender as she looked at my son.
“And I’m happy, too,” I promised her.
“You are, but I’ve also seen the hole inside you, Dakota. One that clearly is longing to be filled. It’s the only reason I’ve been pushing you.”
I didn’t know that vacancy had been so obvious.
“I’m trying, Mom, and I’ll be okay, no matter what. I don’t want you to worry about me. I’m stronger than you think.”
She clucked a gentle sound. “Not worry about you? Impossible. And I know how strong you are. You make me so proud. I don’t think you have the first idea. How I see my fierce, brave, kind girl. You’re the whole package, Dakota.”