I leaned back to look into her face, desperately needing to see what was in her expression—did this mean as much to her as it did to me? Was this new for her too? Different? I didn’t know the words to ask, how to pose the questions, and so I looked for answers in her eyes. I became caught in the spell of her gaze before her lashes lowered, and she took my hand to led me to the bed.
When she lay back, I moved over her, keeping my weight on one knee as my other parted her thighs. “Here we are,” I murmured, repeating the words she’d said to me at the maze. Finally. Finally. As the word echoed in my head, it felt bigger than just the wait I’d endured to make Kira mine. It felt as if it summed up something I’d waited to feel for so very long. All my life.
Finally you’re here. With her.
“Yes,” she said. “Here we are.”
I couldn’t stay still another moment. I rolled my hips against hers and we both moaned, her head tipping back into the mattress. Her hands came up to my head and she raked her fingernails over my scalp, causing me to moan in pleasure.
My gaze ran over her beautiful body, and for a moment I almost didn’t know where to begin. I knew what brought women pleasure, what brought me pleasure, and what resulted in a mutually fulfilling experience. But with Kira, it all went out the window. I tried to remember what I should do first and where I should move on from there, but it all fled my mind, so all I had to draw upon was instinct. I could only focus on the heaviness of my own arousal and the heat of her soft flesh beneath me. I felt unsure and unskilled, as if Kira were the first woman I’d ever touched.
I’ve done this before, I reassured myself, but the words felt false. I wasn’t sure of anything anymore. I could barely remember my name.
She lifted her head and brought her mouth to mine, and suddenly I felt anchored again. God she tasted good. Everything about her was fresh and sweet and soft, and I felt like I might never get enough. I angled my head so my tongue could fully penetrate her mouth and she made a deep sound of approval, her tongue meeting my own to twist and tangle as her pelvis thrust upward onto my throbbing cock, and her soft breasts pressed against my chest. I grunted at the delicious impact and broke from her mouth, trailing my lips down her throat and licking at her hardened nipples, first one and then the other. I rubbed and bit softly and then soothed with my tongue until she went wild beneath me, gasping and pressing her body into mine. God I love that.
“Kira,” I moaned. I wanted to worship her. Every secret spot, every sensitive valley, each tender curve. I nudged her gently until she flipped over, mewling softly as I kissed down her spine, inhaling the feminine scent of her skin, breathing her in. I licked the tiny dimples above her buttocks and then feathered my lips over her ass cheeks and down to the backs of her knees and up again. I’d lost all control, surrendered completely to the dictates of my body. The sounds she made had me wild with want, desperate with love for the sweet, sexy woman beneath me.
“Kira,” I whispered again. It seemed my entire vocabulary had been reduced to that one word.
She turned over, and I moved my hands down her body, stroking, shaping, molding as she arched up, offering herself to me. I wanted to know her, every part. I leaned down and kissed the inside of one thigh as her hands again raked through my hair. “Please,” she gasped as I brought my tongue to her swollen clit and licked around it for several delicious minutes, my body growing even hotter and harder at the gasping sounds of her pleasure. I couldn’t take it any longer. I was going to orgasm without even being inside her, and I desperately wanted to cover her body with my own, to sink inside, to pump and thrust into her hot, slippery softness. But I also didn’t want it to end. It felt like I’d been waiting all my life for this and now that it was here, I didn’t know whether to rush toward it or make it last. “Grayson,” she mewled as she pulled at me, making the decision.
I smiled as I settled my weight on top, our eyes meeting as I rolled my pelvis over hers, my cock aching with need.
Kira gripped my shoulders, a look of pure desperation on her face. “Please,” she said again, her voice raw.
“Yes” was all I could manage, my mouth returning to hers, our kiss wild as her hands stroked my arms, my back, my chest, seeming to be everywhere. Yes, yes, yes. Somewhere in the recesses of my muddled brain, I thought, What is this? If this is lovemaking, then I’ve never done it before. If this is lust, then I’ve only experienced the halfway version of it. This, this was like dancing with lightning—making love with a woman I loved. I pulled back only momentarily to look into her eyes as her hands gripped my shoulders and I entered her slowly. She blinked up at me, her expression the most wonderful mix of desire and impatience.
“Kira,” I murmured again, pressing myself inside her. Her body was warm and wet and soft, but so tight I could barely fit myself inside. I gasped out a groan, shaking for control, as I pressed just a little bit farther inside. She lifted toward me as if I were going too slowly for her, and despite my desperate need, a smile tugged at my lips.
My God, she’s enchanting.
My God, she’s mine.
I entered her a fraction more and Kira let out a small whimper, wrapping her legs around my hips. I pressed deeper, finally sinking all the way inside her on one final thrust. Her eyes fluttered closed, her lips parting as she let out a small sigh. Her gaze met mine again as I started moving, and the intimacy of staring into her eyes while I was joined with her became almost too much to bear. I felt overwhelmed with love, with lust, with emotions I couldn’t even identify, all glittering around me, infusing my skin like magic. Her breath was coming faster and faster, her hips meeting mine thrust for thrust, and I struggled to hold back the pleasure that swirled through my abdomen, drawing my balls up tight, prickling my skin.
I vaguely heard myself whisper words to her that were not words but merely emotions put into sound—they were disjointed, raw, and they came from the very deepest part of my heart.
Her hands skated down my back, exploring until they came to my ass, and she gripped it as I moved inside her.
“Faster,” she moaned, and I felt the hairs prickle on my nape at the excitement of that single command. I picked up the pace, thrusting into her harder, my breath coming out in sharp exhales. I had no idea where I ended and she began. When she let out a small gasp and I felt her muscles begin to contract, I leaned back slightly to bear witness to her surrender. I watched with wonder as she came undone, this woman who had once resisted me and still challenged me at every turn, this woman who fascinated me and pushed me to my limits and always kept me guessing. My wife.
“Kira,” I groaned one final time as I burst apart in a shattering climax, stars shimmering before my eyes as the pleasure peaked. I sagged limply into her, my head resting in the crook of her neck as our breathing slowly, slowly returned to normal. Her hands still ran up and down my back, and I needed her touch, shaken from what we’d just done and the unfamiliar weight of loving a body and a soul.
After a few minutes, I rolled off her and gathered her in my arms, staring blindly up at the ceiling fan above, reeling from having experienced something that made a sad mockery of every sexual encounter I’d ever had before. Because you never loved them. You love her.