The complete lack of reaction from him leaves me feeling cold and restless. Had he been hoping that I wasn’t pregnant?
Of course he was. No man wants to have a baby with the woman who accidentally caused his sister to be sold into sex slavery. But some na?ve part of me actually believed he would be happy.
Idiot.
I lie back down in bed and stare up at the ceiling. A couple of stray tears squeeze out of my eyes but I wipe them away quickly.
I can’t let my happiness be dictated by his. It’s pretty clear that despite these babies, our futures are on separate paths, veering away from each other.
That’s okay. I’ll be happy about these babies all on my own if I have to be.
But even as I try to convince myself of that, the worry still nags in the back of my head. Even if Polly is found, will he forgive me? What if Polly is never found? What then? Will he grow to hate his own children like he hates me?
I don’t know anymore.
I don’t know anything.
12
URI
Twins.
In six months, I’m going to have two children.
It’s a mindfuck, but in the best possible way. I just wish I could enjoy it properly. Without all the stress and worry and fear. If only Polly was here and safe, then I could celebrate this news the way it deserves to be celebrated: with fireworks and champagne and the heads of anyone who’s ever dared to threaten my family posted up on spikes in the front yard.
The moment Dr. Grigory has driven away, I head into my office and start pacing. It takes a few circuits around my office before I start to process everything that’s just been confirmed.
I’m going to be a father. I genuinely thought this moment would happen years down the line—but now that it’s upon me, I feel ready. This is a chance for me to redeem myself. This is a second chance for all of us.
And by all of us, I mean my family.
Alyssa is not part of that.
She can’t be. She doesn’t qualify. Not after her part in Polly’s abduction. She may be the mother of my children, but that’s where it ends. There’s no way I can trust her again after this, and that quashes any kind of future we might have had together.
But fuck me… there’s still that aching voice in my head that wants it.
That’s why I’m pacing. The war between what I have and what I don’t. What I want and what I can never allow myself to acknowledge.
My head is not on completely straight before I pick up my cell and call Nikolai.
“I still haven’t found anything, brother. I told you I’d call if—”
“I’m not calling about that.”
Nikolai falls silent for a moment. “You sound weird. Is everything alright?”
“I just had Dr. Grigory come in to examine Alyssa.”
“Grigory hasn’t retired yet? What happened to Emily?”
“She was getting a little too close to Alyssa,” I explain impatiently. “That and the fact that she didn’t tell me about Alyssa’s condition.”
“What condition?”
“Alyssa’s pregnant.” I’m met with stunned silence on the other line. It makes me wish I’d waited to tell him the news in person. “Nikolai? Did you hear me?”
“I heard you,” he says softly. “Is this… is this for real?”
“Grigory just confirmed it. I saw the ultrasound and everything.”
“You saw the baby?”
“Babies,” I correct. “I’m gonna be a father to twins.”
“My fucking God!” Nikolai exclaims. “Are you serious? You are. You’re serious. I’ll be damned… Is this good news or bad news?”
“In a vacuum, it’s good news.”
I hear Nikolai take a low breath. “Well then, shit—congratulations, man.”
“I need you to keep an eye on her. Make sure she sleeps properly, eats well. It shouldn’t be a problem… since you’ve already been doing that.” The bitterness edges into my voice more than I would’ve liked. “My only concern is that those babies are born healthy. Then I can deal with Alyssa.”
“What is that supposed to mean?”
“That’s my concern, not yours.”
“Uri, c’mon, brother. She’s not just your neighbor now; she’s the mother of your children. Don’t you think you’re being a little too harsh on her?”
“No,” I growl. “I haven’t even begun to be too harsh on her.”
A smarter man would take my tone as warning aplenty—but not my brother. “This is not her fault, Uri. She was trapped in that basement for weeks. Of course she was going to try to escape when she had the chance. She had no idea if she could trust you.”