“Alyssa…” I raise my head when she says my name. “Why aren’t we home?”
I consider telling her the truth, but I don’t want her to worry about Sobakin. She’s had enough worry for a lifetime already. “It’s just an extra safety measure that your brother decided to take. We’ll be back at the estate in no time, I’m sure.” She’s still wary, so I clear my throat and add, “Uri said you used to come here when you were very little.”
She nods. “I remember it from pictures. Feels like another lifetime ago. Everything does.”
I grab her hand, intertwining her pruney fingers with mine. “If you want to talk about it, you know I’m here for you.”
“I know. I just… I don’t think I can just yet.” Her bottom lip trembles. “I was so scared that I’d never see any of you again.”
“Me, too,” I admit. “The last few weeks without you were torture. I’m so glad you’re back, Pol. I’m so glad you’re safe.”
We fall quiet again. The only sound is her breathing and mine and the plinking of water against the sides of the tub. Then her stomach rumbles.
I smile. “Can I get you anything to eat?”
“Chocolate,” she mumbles. “I kept dreaming about chocolate.”
I get to my feet, grateful for something to do. “You got it. I’ll be right back, okay?”
Uri is the only one in the kitchen when I get there. He looks up at me in alarm, more scared than I’ve ever seen him before. “Is she… Did he…？”
I shake my head. “She’s hurting, but I think… I think she’ll be okay.” I step closer to him and cup his face. “You’re an amazing brother, Uri. You brought her back home.”
“But is it too late?” he wonders.
I shake my head again. “She’s still in there. She’s just been through a lot. We need to give her time. We need to be there for her.”
“Thank you, Alyssa,” he says quietly, his eyes heavy with the weight of his words. “For taking care of my sister as though she’s your own.”
I place my hand on my stomach. “These babies make us family now.”
He bends down and kisses me gently on the lips. And for the first time in weeks, this kiss is free from guilt or sadness or fear.
This kiss feels like a new beginning.
It feels like hope.
35
URI
Alyssa radiates exhaustion when she slips into our room that night. That’s clear enough even in the dark. There’s moonlight streaming in through the gable windows and it pours onto her face. She looks like an angel. A tired angel, yes, but still as beautiful as the diamond-encrusted sky outside.
I lean off to the side and turn on the bedside lamp. She yelps and whips around in place. “You’re awake,” she murmurs when she sees me.
“Couldn’t sleep.”
The truth is, I could sleep. Tonight is the first night in forever that I feel like I could close my eyes and pass out for days and days.
I just didn’t want to sleep without her.
“How’s she doing?” I ask instead of saying any of that.
“Sleeping.”
She starts undressing, shucking off her dress and discarding it onto the divan in front of the bed. When she turns to the side, I admire her silhouette. She’s so gorgeous in the half-shadows, in the beams and patches of silvery moonglow. She’s flawed and flawless and perfect and mine.
As she crawls into bed, she adds, “It took a while. She was tired, but I think she’s scared to sleep. Nightmares.”
I nod, doing my damndest to ignore my stiffening erection. “Understandable.”
“I think she was relieved to be in normal clothes,” Alyssa mumbles. “She ate a lot, though it took a while. Then we stayed up talking for a bit. I did most of the talking. It just felt like she wanted to listen to normal things. Household things, pregnancy things. Stuff that can’t hurt her. I—”
When she interrupts herself with a yawn, I raise my eyebrows. “You need rest, too, Alyssa.”
Her face screws up with irritation. “Polly needs me, Uri. She has to come first for a while.”
“You’re pregnant.”
“I’m fine.”
Her fierceness gives me just an inkling of the kind of mother she’s going to be. Strong, independent, deeply protective. A mama bear in the making. A lioness guarding her young.
“Don’t worry about Polly tonight. She’s just down the hall. If she has nightmares, I’ll be there.”